Cant get over it

[GOLDSPACESUIT45]

Cant get over it...to me its too soon...i wont take it..cause MJ had plans and new projects!! MJ had alots of new projects!! There alots of things that needed to be done..dang it.

[indranee]

I know how you feel. :(

[MJfan10]

Same here :(

[MJRockssMyWorld10]

i no how you feel,
dont worry you will come around, soon enough
things just take time to "settle" in
:hug: x

[Rockin.]

:(

I know, I've been on a low like this the past few days.

I've been on a positive for a while but it's hit again.

[Courtney]

I know what you mean. I've been really emotional this week. I haven't cried that much since July.
Just hang in there hun. :hug: Keep the L.O.V.E. for Michael. He's not going anywhere.

[MJRockssMyWorld10]

yer I know love, everyone has it, i hate it
your happy chappy one mintue positiive about everything
then you just feel like you havee hit rock bottom
and thing about all things negitiive and thing of all the bad things that have
happened over the last few months,
but sometimes we have to go threw that patch in order to feel better and carry on

hope your ok xx

[MattyJam]

I feel like I've reached a whole new layer with how I feel about it. The shock and disbelief has gone and is now replaced with immense sadness. Sadness that I will never see him again and sadness about just knowing he isn't around anymore. It wasn't even about the music really, as great as that was. But he hadn't done anything in almost ten years. I think it was just so great knowing that someone so legendary and iconic and so truly unique was still with us. This world is so magic-less without him.

:(

[MJRockssMyWorld10]

if anyone needs to talk feel free to pm me x

[Rockin.]

By the way, since the support forum on here was closed a seperate support forum was created for members of this board.. here it is, you'll see many familiar people there: http://mjjsanctuary.freeforums.org/member-support-guidance-advice-f3.html

[Loopy]

I feel so very sad today, and have done for the last few days. really can't pick myself up. What is there now?? I am never going to see him again - it will be 6 months on Xmas day and i don't know how i am going to cope. Feel so sad.........

[dangerous_88]

Every time I think I am over it , I just can't... I hate the " - 2009 " .... What is that? His expiration date?

I am sick of missing him. I will never ever get over this. Ever.

[ShadowMaster]

i don't know if it's just me that's going mad...people told me:"it's gonna be ok...the pain will eventually go away, you'll see. time heals everything." yet i find myself here ...5 months later not knowing when has all this time went by... i find it hard to stay connected to reality as all i see around is gloomy and superficial...and fake. yet on the inside ... it's love and pain. a pain that instead of going away like i was told...and like i told myself so many times, it seems to grow bigger with each day that goes by. a pain that makes me feel old and i really don't know how i'm going to pull myself out of it... my nature is happiness and laughter...it's written even in my name and i never thought it will ever be so hard to smile. Michael..where are you ? my eyes are looking desperately for you ...but all i catch is glimpses...in my son's eyes...in the very first ray of light that shines announcing a new day... in the face of the moon that seems to guard me as i listen to your voice at night... i find you in the poems i write while i cry... i miss you endlessly and i don't think there are words to express this accurate enough... i want to dive once more in that ocean of love you blessed this world with... i love you...

[Autumn II]

i don't know if it's just me that's going mad...people told me:"it's gonna be ok...the pain will eventually go away, you'll see. time heals everything." yet i find myself here ...5 months later not knowing when has all this time went by... i find it hard to stay connected to reality as all i see around is gloomy and superficial...and fake. yet on the inside ... it's love and pain. a pain that instead of going away like i was told...and like i told myself so many times, it seems to grow bigger with each day that goes by. a pain that makes me feel old and i really don't know how i'm going to pull myself out of it... my nature is happiness and laughter...it's written even in my name and i never thought it will ever be so hard to smile. Michael..where are you ? my eyes are looking desperately for you ...but all i catch is glimpses...in my son's eyes...in the very first ray of light that shines announcing a new day... in the face of the moon that seems to guard me as i listen to your voice at night... i find you in the poems i write while i cry... i miss you endlessly and i don't think there are words to express this accurate enough... i want to dive once more in that ocean of love you blessed this world with... i love you...

What an absolutely beautiful post! Made me cry (again), but thank you for writing it. You gave words to how a LOT of people feel.

[MIST]

I found this E-card on the animal rescue site.
http://www.therainforestsite.com/clickToGive/viewecardsample.faces?siteId=3&ecardId=760

Yesterday I went to a church and the priest talked about the light is bigger than darkness.
MJ had many proiects and was so alive before he left us.
Of course it was hard work but he was going to do shows again, and music and seemed to be happy about it.
With so many outsold concerts with no new music he must have known he was loved.
We will miss him forever but remember in the darkness there is the biggest star that ever existed on this planet.

[Louise.]

Hugs to you all. :cry: :hug:

[elusive moonwalker]

its been 5 months why would anyone be over it. u never get over losing someone like this

[xthunderx2]

its been 5 months why would anyone be over it. u never get over losing someone like this

I agree with your post.....I am not over it either...:sad:.....It is going to take along time to get over losing Michael...I feel as though I have lost apart of my soul...:(

[Michael Jackson Moonwalk]

Guy's it hasn't been that long.....the pain and sadness and everything else are still very much present. As I understand it, grief tends to go through bouts. Sometimes I think I'm coping, whereas other times I'm just absolutley shocked and I freeze with the realisation of it. Especially when I think of how close he was to the concerts, and how close we were to seeing him...It's never going to be the same again. Life goes on, but it's not the same. Magic-less is the word. We lost something, the whole world lost something so precious and irreplacable and it's still VERY raw. For me it will always be something I carry with me.

HUGS to all :better:

[Mariajoaosilva]

i don't know if it's just me that's going mad...people told me:"it's gonna be ok...the pain will eventually go away, you'll see. time heals everything." yet i find myself here ...5 months later not knowing when has all this time went by... i find it hard to stay connected to reality as all i see around is gloomy and superficial...and fake. yet on the inside ... it's love and pain. a pain that instead of going away like i was told...and like i told myself so many times, it seems to grow bigger with each day that goes by. a pain that makes me feel old and i really don't know how i'm going to pull myself out of it... my nature is happiness and laughter...it's written even in my name and i never thought it will ever be so hard to smile. Michael..where are you ? my eyes are looking desperately for you ...but all i catch is glimpses...in my son's eyes...in the very first ray of light that shines announcing a new day... in the face of the moon that seems to guard me as i listen to your voice at night... i find you in the poems i write while i cry... i miss you endlessly and i don't think there are words to express this accurate enough... i want to dive once more in that ocean of love you blessed this world with... i love you...


HUGSSSS.I know so well how you are feeling!
You just read my soul with this post.
God Bless you.

[lovelymj]

It won't be over......

[jfleenor2]

We'll probably never get "over it", but we'll learn to cope. I'm going between some happiness -- when I listen to some of his songs, or see a pic of his sweet smile, then sadness, then anger! It really sucks!!! I want Murray in jail!!
Magic-less........... :(

[cleopatra09]

i have never been waiting for the time when i get over it !

it hurts, it really hurts more and more every day,
but i don't care, this pain makes me feel him,

and if this pain is the only way to feel him inside me,
i would love this pain and will be looking for it in every minute of my life...

[Nar]

This is MICHAEL JACKSON we're talking about. I doubt a year could pass, let alone 5 months with anyone who loved him, for things to settle.

There are many times I wake up now and think to myself... I made some really good friends on MJJC. And that is probably the only thing that's keeping me going with some optimism. Because if it werent for you beautiful people...who knows what I'd be doing today.

But yeah, I feel it too. The strange emptiness. Its a devastating reality. Its going to take more than a mere 5 months for something of this magnitude to settle.

All I could say is to stay strong. I promise you, theres still something to live for. Theres still something to help us keep moving forward.

But it is without doubt, we will all be feeling that sudden emptiness. Because many of us, though we keep saying we know he's gone, tend to forget he is. I always tend to refer to him in the present.

He was such a special soul.
But you are all special souls too. I've a great feeling many of you will play as his successor in different areas of your life. A great reminder that love is the most important thing in the world.

[MJstarlight]

Every time I think I am over it , I just can't... I hate the " - 2009 " .... What is that? His expiration date?

I am sick of missing him. I will never ever get over this. Ever.

I know me too im scared to move into the year 2010.. It scares me so much :cry: It still feels like a big nightmare, not real at all :no:

[Suzie B]

I feel such unbearable sadness too. I used to suffer badly from anxiety problems, got loads better then since 25 June I have been in a terrible state. I keep going to work, carrying on with life but it feels like all energy, excitement, happiness and wonderment has been taken away from me, its like it went with him. I miss him. Also every now and then I keep researching whether he could be somewhere on this earth, whether there might just eb a glimmer of hope but that's just me wishing and hoping for the impossible. Its so hard this pain in our hearts, I really understand you all and even though I am not always able to come on here I will try to come on this forum as much as possible so I feel that Michael is in my life today and so we can share our thoughts.

[dangerous_88]

Guy's it hasn't been that long.....the pain and sadness and everything else are still very much present. As I understand it, grief tends to go through bouts. Sometimes I think I'm coping, whereas other times I'm just absolutley shocked and I freeze with the realisation of it. Especially when I think of how close he was to the concerts, and how close we were to seeing him...It's never going to be the same again. Life goes on, but it's not the same. Magic-less is the word. We lost something, the whole world lost something so precious and irreplacable and it's still VERY raw. For me it will always be something I carry with me.

HUGS to all :better:

Exactly. Magic-less. Don't want to make anyone depressed or anything,but to me, life has lost its special something. I was in some bad period these 3 years,a lot of stress and this year it was all going well. I said to myself - I am finally happy, getting what I want,what I deserve... And then it all crumbled down that night. I stood there, and said, wait - so this is my life? Can't I take another scenario? And ever since I've been watching and saying - this is not me. Not my life. I want a new chance. For me, for all the people in the world as me, for MICHAEL. We are good people. We deserved good things. And we got this eternal sadness...

I guess it all just comes to his immortal art. And everything about his character and being.

And it's all like this:

"At the end of my life, I'll look back on my life, and I know that my life was good. I went after what I wanted. And I never really got it. But it don't matter at all."


We just need to learn that it really doesn't matter. I hope we learn soon. And I hope we learn together.

[Michael Jackson Moonwalk]

A few posters, including me have used the word MAGIC-LESS to describe the way life and the world feels without him. Magic was one of Michael's favourite things, and he used that word alot. I think it's the perfect term to describe this state. We have to live in a magic-less world, and still remember the magic that was created. It echoes forever.

:better: Love to all of you...

[Mia]

Yeah!

[Billie_Jean09]

Just posted in another thread this.............I still think that I am going to wake up from this nightmare and say ''Oh my goodness............Michael Jackson died''.............it isnt real.............it cant be..........5 and a half months on.........:-(
Sadly is is real. I have better days.......acceptance..........then days like today when denial is a lovely safe place.........until reality hits home......
Hugs to everyone.
xxx

[MarielovesMJ]

It still shocks me, I will never get over it. :cry:

[ruchie]

It gets much harder when Christmas , New Years ,Valentines Day and Easter are about to come around and being that he started celebrating Christmas with his children and probably went to New Years parties,I know all of his family and friends will feel the emptiness that we fans feel. I just can't believe that it will be 6 months on Dec 25 that this wonderful loving caring man has been gone.Yes,His Music and Good Deeds will carry on but his physical presence in real time will be sorely missed by all. There's not a day that's gone by that I haven't stopped thinking of him and what could have been and what he could have been doing around this time but even though we have these memories of him, he's with us wherever he is, always in our hearts and I know you fans will always remember how much he loved us. He's smiling now from Heaven ,so when Christmas comes,Say a prayer,You might hear his voice if you blankout your mind from stress just for a minute and smile too when you hear him speak in his soft voice letting you know he loves you.. Hey ,You might hear him say Merry Christmas.... Just listen..

[blue_eyed_belle]

Cant get over it...to me its too soon...i wont take it..cause MJ had plans and new projects!! MJ had alots of new projects!! There alots of things that needed to be done..dang it.

OK, firstly I wish to point out that I feel exactly the same way. This pain just won't go away. If I stop visiting MJJC, it gets worse. If I continue to visit the site, I spend hours on here (not good when you have a degree to complete, as I'm sure many of you will know!)

Michael had so much still to give, but there was a purpose behind the TII concerts. A meaning to his new songs. They were to show love, compassion. To spread the message that this world needs healing. Personally I thought that this was conveyed brilliantly in the film - Kenny clearly put across the message, mixing such energy with passion and emotion. This was not MJ's final few days - they were the beginning of something new. Of a world where people think more about their treatment of others as well as the planet. Michael 'did his duty' before he lost his life :cry:

I sincerely believe, because I have to believe, that Michael's plans and projects were in place to spread the message that he's been spreading for years now. Heal the World - we are in a mess, and we all need to get together and try and put it right. I hope that in future we will be able to get together and make a difference, just like Michael did.

Mr. Michael Joseph Jackson, I love you and your fans very much :) x

[FunkeyJay]

I feel your pain. I mean, I know how you feel. I just can't get over "it". I don't understand what happened. I know what happened. But why? There are times where I seem to forget what happened, like I have a piece of my past back. Watching good ol' Mike and feeling good, but it doesn't take long and reality comes back. Yesterday hit me very hard again after watching Spike Lee's video. I can't believe that this wonderful & beautiful human being is not here... I feel like this statement is far away from reality. And no one seems to understand. Except fans. I miss Michael so much. I was looking so forward to see him, I wanted to turn my dreams into reality. I even told my mother when I have seen Michael I could die, because there's nothing left I want to see. I was so damn happy. I'm actually a very happy person, but "something" is missing in my life. I miss Michael so much... :cry:

[Gwyneira]

Mhm. It's like Michael's passing is now a fact in my brain. I know this. Sometimes I can even casually think about it without getting very upset. But whenever I REALLY think about it, WHY it happened and the people he left behind and the things he wanted to do... it just doesn't get any better. The pain is always there and very real. Death is a part of life, people have to accept that. But premature death doesn't have to be. And I will never be able to accept Michael dying, because it wasn't supposed to happen. End of. There can be closure.

[Sarah_MJ]

Same here. Seems like everything has changed since Michael's gone. And I wish so much that he would come back and everything's like it used to be. Just knowing he's there and gives love to the world. Michael has always been a light for me. This will continue forever, but in the moment it just hurts because I miss him so much.

Hugs to all of you guys...

[bubbyduck4MJ]

I hadn't even clicked that 25th December Christmas day will be 6 months :(

[SIDEWALK]

still hasn't even sunk in yet :(

[andythemisfit]

I don't think I will ever get over what's happened either. I was so depressed yesterday, just missing him terribly. :(

[cyberjackson]

Wow we can all relate to you. I can.:(

Happy one day...sad the next. It just makes me sick with depression to know that Michael's body is just resting in a casket somewhere on this cold hard planet. I know his spirit is very much alive, but it's just not the same anymore.:no: Yea people celebrate his music and dance... but Michael the HUMAN BEING. He was a lovely man. He was so different and unique. Very special and he shone like.. I am just rambling. But if I don't talk about this, I'll go insane (to where it's scary). :cry: I am scared without Michael. I feel naked, empty, alone, and just afraid. His smile would make my day, his voice was so sweet, and his eyes were so deep they could peer right into your soul.. and his aura was so big. His love was like no other. I know he is watching over us and his family. I look at the clouds more, and look at the sunrise trying to find some sweet sign from him. I do this because it's so beautiful..like he was, and it's kind of calming. I feel like I am going crazy. MICHAEL I MISS YOU!!!:cry::boohooI just want to hold him and show him love, and never let go. I'll never let go of Michael.

Sorry guys fo going on.. thanks for listening.:(

[Em_Mj]

I wanna just wake up, 26th June, one month away from me seeing MJ. This has all been an awful long nightmare!

[AlvaMJJ]

I don't know how to get over Michael's death when all I think of is I WANT HIM BACK!
It's impossible. My need for him is stonger than ever.

All I Do Is Think Of You (The Jackson 5)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcYS7Q9LzWY



I wanna just wake up, 26th June, one month away from me seeing MJ. This has all been an awful long nightmare!

I want this, too.

[PrincessMichaela]

I've never cried this long a period for anyone. I still can't believe it. And I do not understand it. Why him? Why does he have to be gone? I want him back so badly. Why, why, why?

[Cinnamon234]

Sometimes i'm okay, other times it hits me really hard. I will forever be sad about Michael's passing. There's no really "getting over" it for me, at least not completely. I'm coping better, yes absolutely, but there are times still when I cry over him. The sadness will be always be there.

[Michaelismagic]

I just cant stop crying
I'LL NEVER LET GO
:cry:
:cry:
:cry:

[Louise.]

Today's just one of those days that I feel really crap. :cry:

[cyberjackson]

:no: I don't know what to do or how to heal. I'll never heal. Everyone here feels the same. The only thing we can do is be here for one another. I can't let him go.:( I'm gonna cry now..

[MJstarlight]

^^

me too :cry:

[MicHil]

they told me i'm going through a phase...

this time i tell them "I dear god hope so"

it's not going away. I'll never get over it... i can't even cope with it.
i don't care about his projects i don't care about his new whatever. i care for him to be happy and the blessings to be there for his kids.

[GOLDSPACESUIT45]

we wont get over it ..nope never

[AnnieRUOkay89]

I ask myself this everyday, friends think I'm crazy because I just feel so depressed sometimes. Its almost like apart of me is gone, my heart feels empty at times, it's terrible. I wish to be able to handle it someday, but I just can't stop missing him. :cry:

[MJsBollywoodGirl7]

I am missing Michael so much now. That I can't even begin to describe of how much I miss him. I am stuck back in to my state of deep depression and sadness because of it. Plus I have been noticing the one thing I thought I will never see myself do. That is turning to food for some kind of comfort. I am an emotional eater now. Because of what has happen to Michael. I hate knowing that I am gaining all the weight that I had lost during the summer back. I just totally stopped eating during the summer. Because I really took what had happen hard. But you know I really don't care now if I gain all the weight that I had lost back. I will never be able to get over what has happen to Michael. I have never lost anyone that I love to murder before. And it is worst for me now because I think about death all of the time now. Cause I just want to be with Michael so much now. Since I can't kill myself all I can do now is just wait and hope I die of an early age. So I can be with my beloved Michael.

[BunnyHead]

I agree 100%

I honestly cannot get over it, I am so much disbelief and saddness.

I never thought I would see the day come, the words "r.i.p Michael Jackson" just don't seem right.

The only way that I can be be somewhat happy is watching his music videos, interviews etc etc because I never want to let him go. Some assholes tell me "Your obsessed with his music, your obsession is unhealthy, your not a family member so get over it"
No one is acting like they are a family member, but if you grew up on MJ's talent, warmth and intelligence the way so many people did you might understand.

It hurst so much because I feel like if people didnt falsly dog him so much, he'd still be here. It's like watching school bullies pick on someone and break them down.

It's hard to cope with.

[januska]

Early in the morning six months ago I received a message saying RIP Michael Jackson. I remember getting out of my bed and turning on my computer just thinking "What? What? What? No. No. No.." The bad news were already everywhere and I spent hours reading it over and over again visiting many sites that were all telling the same story.. Couldn't eat, couldn't believe my eyes, couldn't cry. Over half my life I had loved his music, loved to watch his short films, loved his dancing, spirit, creativity...everything. Loved the man. And though I never got a chance to meet him, I was just happy to know that he was somewhere. I just hoped that where ever he was, he would be happy. And then suddenly...he just wasn't around anymore. That was way too much to really understand.. However, in the evening I went to see some local artists and groups perform and my friend turned out wearing a black MJ t-shirt, black tie and fedora and that was the moment when tears came.. After that I've found myself crying more often than probably ever in my life.
Today I've been thinking a lot about that day and also reading how others felt back then and how they are coping right now..(and yes, I've been crying my eyes out..) It feels kind of good though to know that one's not alone, that others are going through same things. Not a day has gone by without thinking of Michael but obviously some days are better than others. I'm just going to have to think that when more time goes by, there will be more of those good days. Days, when you can say, damn I'm so happy to have loved him and to have enjoyed his incredible talent and to have lived during a time when he was here. So good days definitely don't mean not thinking of him :) And anyway, half a year is really a short period of time when you have lost a special someone. Let's try to stay strong. For our angel..

[twinklEE]

I'm feeling all of you, I can't get over it myself. It's just unbelievable. To say the past year was the worst year of my life is an understatement.

[*Billie Jean*]

I will never be able to get over what has happen to Michael. I have never lost anyone that I love to murder before. And it is worst for me now because I think about death all of the time now. Cause I just want to be with Michael so much now. Since I can't kill myself all I can do now is just wait and hope I die of an early age. So I can be with my beloved Michael.

I know exactly how you feel. I pray that God take me away to where he is.... He has not grant any dreams of mine. He must realize this last wish of me. The hurt of his loss is too huge for me, my heart and soul to endure till it will come for me to go. I do feel as though the world has stopped..or at least slowed down, in some way. A piece of me has definitely gone with Michael. The only way I can find happiness ever again is to be with Michael. And he's in Heaven.

[Dangerous21.1]

i'm like the rest of you, can't get over it, but don't want to at the same time. just wish Michael was still here. 2009 was the worst year of my life by far.

[januska]

Yep, 2009 has been a crappy year even though it started just fine.. :( But unfortunately every new year to come will be one without Michael :cry:

[BunnyHead]

Early in the morning six months ago I received a message saying RIP Michael Jackson. I remember getting out of my bed and turning on my computer just thinking "What? What? What? No. No. No.." The bad news were already everywhere and I spent hours reading it over and over again visiting many sites that were all telling the same story.. Couldn't eat, couldn't believe my eyes, couldn't cry. Over half my life I had loved his music, loved to watch his short films, loved his dancing, spirit, creativity...everything. Loved the man. And though I never got a chance to meet him, I was just happy to know that he was somewhere. I just hoped that where ever he was, he would be happy. And then suddenly...he just wasn't around anymore. That was way too much to really understand.. However, in the evening I went to see some local artists and groups perform and my friend turned out wearing a black MJ t-shirt, black tie and fedora and that was the moment when tears came.. After that I've found myself crying more often than probably ever in my life.
Today I've been thinking a lot about that day and also reading how others felt back then and how they are coping right now..(and yes, I've been crying my eyes out..) It feels kind of good though to know that one's not alone, that others are going through same things. Not a day has gone by without thinking of Michael but obviously some days are better than others. I'm just going to have to think that when more time goes by, there will be more of those good days. Days, when you can say, damn I'm so happy to have loved him and to have enjoyed his incredible talent and to have lived during a time when he was here. So good days definitely don't mean not thinking of him :) And anyway, half a year is really a short period of time when you have lost a special someone. Let's try to stay strong. For our angel..


:( :( :(

This made me tear up

I was at work when I got the news, my co worker came in and said "Did you hear Michael Jackson died??" I was like "WHAT?????????" so we checked CNN right away and it only said he was in cardiac arrest, I froze for a moment and said to myself "I'm going to ignore this because I know if I do he will be okay"...but me being curious because I didnt want to find out any other way..I logged on to CNN and read the news.

I immediatly called home to check on my family because I know how much they love him, I was screaming on the phone with my mom at my desk and one of my co-workers came to comfort me.

I left work early because I could not pull it together, I went home to family because we all needed to be together. I didnt even think to head to Times Square because I needed to get to my family, all we did was watch his videos and celebrity comments all night, I didnt even sleep that night even though I had to work and I had a graduation to go to, it was all about Michael. The following morning I drew tattoos on my family members of the MJJ logo with the words "1958-forever". Coincedently at my sisters graduation they played "Thriller" for one of the slideshows and everyone applauded loud and some graduates broke into the Thriller routine, of course I was crying.

But that whole weekend I saw some of the most unusual things, I saw those weird clouds and they seemed to be shaped like hearts, the next day I saw a solid rainbow
I never ever saw a solid rainbow in my life and I feel like that was Michael letting the world know that he's okay and that he's watching.

[Mahatma]

Yep, 2009 has been a crappy year even though it started just fine.. :( But unfortunately every new year to come will be one without Michael :cry:
That's true, januska. But, do keep in mind that Michael will always be watching. He will always be by our sides no matter what happens. Michael will never leave us, he will forever remain in our hearts and absolutely nothing can change that.

Stay strong for Michael, Jan.

:hug:

[a_silver_lining]

i remember june 25th like it was yesterday..i was surfing the web i had clicked on the TMZ site it said michael jackson dead age 50 i was like what???? so i turned on the tv cnn fox and other news programs were reporting it i was like OMG ..i didnt cry i was vvvv numb like in disbelief i just sat there watching the news all day all night...trying to get it to sink in it finally hit me when i saw them taking his body to the helicopter under that white sheet and flying him to the waiting coroners van,then landing putting him in that vanand driving off..... then the tears came and they really poured as i lie there at night i couldnt stop crying my heart had been shattered into a million pieces...and it will never heal i have lost my favorite singer my musical idol...someone who has been a vvvvvv important staple in my life michael is gone but his legacy will live on in the hearts an souls of all his fans forever~~!!!!!!

[ForeverBeInPeaceMichael]

the question is:

Are we meant to and do we have to get over it?

No, ive told my parents that i never will. His loss truely is so so so massive for us to endure. there is no doubt there.


And now i feel i am comdemned to live with this broken heart and this pain inside just because my parents can't talorate my loss.
it is unfair...

[Tin Angel]

I just don't want this year to end! I don't want! :cry: This is so unfair! 2010... the first year without him, NO. I can't understand this, I can't. :cry: Why the world is still going on??? Michael, come back, come back, please...

[januska]

That's true, januska. But, do keep in mind that Michael will always be watching. He will always be by our sides no matter what happens. Michael will never leave us, he will forever remain in our hearts and absolutely nothing can change that.

Stay strong for Michael, Jan.

:hug:

You are absolutely right. That's a sweet, comforting thought. But it's also kind of bittersweet.. I mean that's all we have now, who wouldn't like to have Michael also truely, physically here? I know it will never be, but at the moment it just doesn't always seem to be enough having him in my heart - after all, he has been there for quite a few years already :yes:

[MJmakesmeDance]

I rarely post on here because it hurts too much. The threads are almost all about Michael in the "past" and it just makes it too real. I deal with it by watching youtube interviews and funny things about him.

Michael I miss you so much. I don't even care if you ever had another concert or album. Just want you here with us. :cry:

Hugs to all of you:better:

[Mahatma]

I rarely post on here because it hurts too much. The threads are almost all about Michael in the "past" and it just makes it too real. I deal with it by watching youtube interviews and funny things about him.

Michael I miss you so much. I don't even care if you ever had another concert or album. Just want you here with us. :cry:

Hugs to all of you:better:
Same here, I try to avoid the pictures section as much as I can. Especially the newer photos of him. It's surreal that he's no longer with us anymore.

:(

[MJmakesmeDance]

Same here, I try to avoid the pictures section as much as I can. Especially the newer photos of him. It's surreal that he's no longer with us anymore.

:(

omg I can't even believe you said "especially the newer photos of him." I feel the same way. I can only look at older pics and LOVE his older interviews because he's so hilarious and makes me smile watching him. :cheers:

[Mahatma]

omg I can't even believe you said "especially the newer photos of him." I feel the same way. I can only look at older pics and LOVE his older interviews because he's so hilarious and makes me smile watching him. :cheers:
I believe we all feel the same way.

He's funny in his newer interviews as well, but it just hurts me because it seems that he's still here with us. I can't really explain it but I think it's understandable.

:(

[*Billie Jean*]

When you think you have no more tears left they just start falling.. I can't sleep at nights, I just look at the sky... and cry... I feel like I'll cry forever! I don't know how to deal with this. I can't find any sense or reason in anything. I know our feelings are still raw but somehow I don't believe I will ever fully recover. :cry:

[Miss_star]

i remember june 25th like it was yesterday..i was surfing the web i had clicked on the TMZ site it said michael jackson dead age 50 i was like what???? so i turned on the tv cnn fox and other news programs were reporting it i was like OMG ..i didnt cry i was vvvv numb like in disbelief i just sat there watching the news all day all night...trying to get it to sink in it finally hit me when i saw them taking his body to the helicopter under that white sheet and flying him to the waiting coroners van,then landing putting him in that vanand driving off..... then the tears came and they really poured as i lie there at night i couldnt stop crying my heart had been shattered into a million pieces...and it will never heal i have lost my favorite singer my musical idol...someone who has been a vvvvvv important staple in my life michael is gone but his legacy will live on in the hearts an souls of all his fans forever~~!!!!!!

that is exactly what I did :( that day was just..horrific...I shudder when I think back...for a while I got flashbacks of that days news :cry: :better:




Cant get over it...to me its too soon...i wont take it..cause MJ had plans and new projects!! MJ had alots of new projects!! There alots of things that needed to be done..dang it.


I feel so very sad today, and have done for the last few days. really can't pick myself up. What is there now?? I am never going to see him again - it will be 6 months on Xmas day and i don't know how i am going to cope. Feel so sad.........


Every time I think I am over it , I just can't... I hate the " - 2009 " .... What is that? His expiration date?

I am sick of missing him. I will never ever get over this. Ever.

:weeping: I know...same here..I understand :cry:


i don't know if it's just me that's going mad...people told me:"it's gonna be ok...the pain will eventually go away, you'll see. time heals everything." yet i find myself here ...5 months later not knowing when has all this time went by... i find it hard to stay connected to reality as all i see around is gloomy and superficial...and fake. yet on the inside ... it's love and pain. a pain that instead of going away like i was told...and like i told myself so many times, it seems to grow bigger with each day that goes by. a pain that makes me feel old and i really don't know how i'm going to pull myself out of it... my nature is happiness and laughter...it's written even in my name and i never thought it will ever be so hard to smile. Michael..where are you ? my eyes are looking desperately for you ...but all i catch is glimpses...in my son's eyes...in the very first ray of light that shines announcing a new day... in the face of the moon that seems to guard me as i listen to your voice at night... i find you in the poems i write while i cry... i miss you endlessly and i don't think there are words to express this accurate enough... i want to dive once more in that ocean of love you blessed this world with... i love you...

wow, that is such a beautiful post :cry: :huggy:

[BunnyHead]

I just made myself sad again because I watched "This Is It" like 45 minutes ago and the ending always makes me cry.

I can't get over it, I just can't do it.

[smile4mj]

Michael is gone in reality but in my fantasy, he is very much alive,healthy and happy and never old in my dream.I need to keep up with this fantasy if not I'm doomed.. I cannot listen to the song gone too soon,speechless..all those sad songs. It'll just ruin my fantasy.. :( I know this sounds crazy but this really makes me feel better :(

[MJfan10]

Michael is gone in reality but in my fantasy, he is very much alive,healthy and happy. I need to keep up with this fantasy if not I'm doomed.. I cannot listen to the song gone too soon,speechless..all those sad songs. It'll just ruin my fantasy.. :( I know this sounds crazy but this really makes me feel better :(

Don't worry, I do the same.

[raz2911]

Michaels death was the first person that I loved who has died and I was numb like others are saying and I had to go to bed before it was publicly announced as I had school early in the morning but I just lay there comforting myself thinking he's gonna be fine and then I heard my mum coming up the stairs she broke the news to my sister first because she would take it better than me but even though I couldn't hear I knew it. She came in the room and said come down stairs. So I went down and it was on CNN MJs dead I cried and cried until the sun came out and was so depressed I had to take a day off school.
I think that no I know that I will remember it forever as the saddest day of my life :cry: :(

[*Billie Jean*]

I'm feeling REALLY bad today. I am sitting here in tears.. I was supposed to be in London today at the O2 at the concert... :weeping: I still can't believe he's gone... My heart is broken. It's so hard. I want to die....just to see him again!

[januska]

I'm feeling REALLY bad today. I am sitting here in tears.. I was supposed to be in London today at the O2 at the concert... :weeping: I still can't believe he's gone... My heart is broken. It's so hard. I want to die....just to see him again!

:cry: Oh no, can't even quite imagine how you're feeling since I never got tickets to TII..I have no words..
Just..never forget he is still there for you, he's in your heart no matter what. Try to stay strong. :better:

[amyzabeth]

i don't know if it's just me that's going mad...people told me:"it's gonna be ok...the pain will eventually go away, you'll see. time heals everything." yet i find myself here ...5 months later not knowing when has all this time went by... i find it hard to stay connected to reality as all i see around is gloomy and superficial...and fake. yet on the inside ... it's love and pain. a pain that instead of going away like i was told...and like i told myself so many times, it seems to grow bigger with each day that goes by. a pain that makes me feel old and i really don't know how i'm going to pull myself out of it... my nature is happiness and laughter...it's written even in my name and i never thought it will ever be so hard to smile. Michael..where are you ? my eyes are looking desperately for you ...but all i catch is glimpses...in my son's eyes...in the very first ray of light that shines announcing a new day... in the face of the moon that seems to guard me as i listen to your voice at night... i find you in the poems i write while i cry... i miss you endlessly and i don't think there are words to express this accurate enough... i want to dive once more in that ocean of love you blessed this world with... i love you...

Wow, :cry: what an amazing post. I'm sitting here crying while reading it. I feel the same way. People who don't understand how I feel say it will get easier, but it hasn't. I feel worse on some days. Sometimes I feel like I have to put on a mask, or a fake smile to give people around me the impression that I'm doing okay so they won't think I'm crazy. Ahhh I just miss him so much. I think about how he isn't going to be around to see his children grow up and stuff and that just kills me. :boohoo:

[*Billie Jean*]

:cry: Oh no, can't even quite imagine how you're feeling since I never got tickets to TII..I have no words..
Just..never forget he is still there for you, he's in your heart no matter what. Try to stay strong. :better:

Thanks, Januska. I guess part of my problem is that I don't want to get over it. I don't want there to be a time when I feel ok that he's not here, cos it will never be ok. :weeping:

[januska]

I guess part of my problem is that I don't want to get over it. I don't want there to be a time when I feel ok that he's not here, cos it will never be ok. :weeping:

I agree, it will never be ok, especially when you consider the way things happened.. :cry: I don't see a way to get over it either, but - really slowly - I'm starting to see a way to kind of live with it, to kind of accept what is and that it can't be changed. It's a bit difficult to explain.
I still want him back, I do. But I'm trying really hard to convince myself, that Michael wouldn't want anyone of us to stop living because of what happened to him. I strongly believe he would want us to keep living and to keep giving everything we have to make this world a better and more beautiful place. And then, maybe one day we will see him again..:angel:

[*Billie Jean*]

I agree, it will never be ok, especially when you consider the way things happened.. :cry: I don't see a way to get over it either, but - really slowly - I'm starting to see a way to kind of live with it, to kind of accept what is and that it can't be changed. It's a bit difficult to explain.
I still want him back, I do. But I'm trying really hard to convince myself, that Michael wouldn't want anyone of us to stop living because of what happened to him. I strongly believe he would want us to keep living and to keep giving everything we have to make this world a better and more beautiful place. And then, maybe one day we will see him again..:angel:

I still haven't accepted it. I feel lost and confused. It's like I don't want to accept it,but so many people keep talking about it, so I have no choice but to. Even when I listen to songs that are suppose to make you feel good and dance like "Off the Wall" & "Rock With You" I start crying, and I get so depressed. One song that makes me the saddest though, is "Heaven Can Wait". I feel really sad everyday, sometimes I feel like crying every second. It hurts but I've been trying my best, that's all I can do. I don't understand how this could ever happen to beautiful Michael. :weeping:

[januska]

Even when I listen to songs that are suppose to make you feel good and dance like "Off the Wall" & "Rock With You" I start crying, and I get so depressed. One song that makes me the saddest though, is "Heaven Can Wait".

"Heaven Can Wait" is one of those songs that I can't listen to at all any more :no: One time I tried but..you could just as well rip my heart out of my chest and stomp on it..:cry: No can do.
Somehow it's better for me to watch concerts and stuff instead of listening to his albums, because when I see him perform I can easily fool myself into believing that he's still here with us. (Ok, I didn't realize it sounded that crazy until seeing that written...) So for a while I can just sit down and enjoy his amazing talent. Too bad no video lasts forever :boohoo

[*Billie Jean*]

"Heaven Can Wait" is one of those songs that I can't listen to at all any more :no: One time I tried but..you could just as well rip my heart out of my chest and stomp on it..:cry: No can do.
Somehow it's better for me to watch concerts and stuff instead of listening to his albums, because when I see him perform I can easily fool myself into believing that he's still here with us. (Ok, I didn't realize it sounded that crazy until seeing that written...) So for a while I can just sit down and enjoy his amazing talent. Too bad no video lasts forever :boohoo

I am sitting here as I write this watching the live History show from Munich and Michael is singing "I'll Be There" and I still find it hard to beleive that he is gone. It doesnt seem real, I am waiting to wake up and find it's been a nightmare.. I feel so numb... I can't sleep..eat.. do anything I can only cry and be miserable :( I just don't know how I can go on living without the love of my life. Michael was everything to me. I'm still in denial about the whole thing. It just feels like I'm stuck in a sick and twisted nightmare that I can't wake from. My whole world has just collapsed. :weeping: