'In this world there's much confusion"...

Hi...I haven't posted here in almost 2 years...I didn't want to do it again. I'll just make an exception now, following this tragedy, with some thoughts that I didn't know where to integrate, whether in the Main section or the speculation section. I chose the latter, and I'll have to add the disclaimer first that with some of the lines below, my intention will not have been that of judging or throwing stones (except for at the real enemies in Michael's life, which doesn't include the fans), but of having tried to see all of what happened from the perspective of witnessing/trying to witness a most difficult destiny, however exceptional, that couldn't really have been avoided in the end. So, if I come across as judgemental or insensitive at some point, it is actually fairly objective in my view, as I'll try to explain. It's very long, but very important in my view....I apologize in advance for the length and mispellings, I wrote this very fast. And in a way for the thread's title..the first thing that came to my mind.


Michael Jackson…He was in no way out of it..

A man calling people in the middle of the night to tell them Happy Birthday on Father’s Day (like he did with Will I Am just 5 days before the tragedy), he’d tell Akon (as he put it) to eat, drunk water and exercise), talked about an environmental song (with Deepak Chopra about 3 days before) and how excited he was about that, reading and getting inspired by the poems of Tagore, talking to Chopra’s son 3 weeks before about Kim Jong and the kidnapping of those 2 girls, what he could do to help saving them…the producer he contributed with for the creation and release of a clasical album; and basically many others confirming he’d talk to them in the early hours…; him being involved in virtually every aspect of TII, visually, musically, coreographically, creatively (including for merchandise) and even technically (not because Ortega and Philips said that only, but because of him really being involved now more than ever and wanting that, once he saw the concept of the show coming to life more and more it being obvious from the ideas and plans the crew revealed)…; instructing people, the dancers, the band to perform a certain way…Frank Dileo, I think, or sb else, said on his last night (…) he ate, drank orange juice and hot water (or tea), told him he was ‚happy’ and that it is their time again..Karen Faye also says he was happy..this was in no way was he a junkie with no knowledge of what’s going on around him. And these tidbits are only a small part of what he must have still done and said. In fact, those past few months and weeks he had devoted himself so much to so many things…doing so many things in one day: being a father, exercising with Lou Ferrigno, getting ready for the rehearsals, working on his albums in paralel and other projects….altogether having to deal with too many problems and pressures and lawsuits and even health problems and sleeping problems to be able to deal with without taking medication.

When was he ever out of it or isolated, when he’d always respond to his fans, signing aurographs, inviting them in, and even ackowledging his paps, and he’d participate at the family meetings (Mark Lester spoke about how he and the children were present at a Janet’s party at a restaurant about 3 weeks before his passing..Marlon said he saw him in May last, on occasion of hteir parents’ 60th marriage anniversary, and was there for Family Day too)… Wouldn’t a person with so many responsibilities and tasks need their privacy from time to time, finding comfort in his own home, away from the rustle and bustle and paparazzi and fans hysteria all around him? Andif he didn’t feel like seeing the family sometimes was because Joe Jackson and some brothers were always pushing the reunion tour down his throat…Yes, they did. And just like Joe said, he didn’t want to show his suffering to them. The man was forced (he couldn’t t say no, as he didn’t want to disapoint anyone and hurt his family) to accept the reunion…they were to do it eventually November 14 this year..He made at one point the statement he didn’t want a reunion with them. The pour soul had already been pressured into accepting a contract with AEG. He wanted the family to just be family to him. In the past he accepted touring the Victory tour, yielding to the pressures, although he felt like hell and didn’t want to do it, so he imposed the condition of donating his earnings to charity; he also responded to pressures from his family to go to the Gordy and Taylor Gala in ‚94..when he was more dead than alive. But, as always, could he refuse his family?…The 2001 concerts, where he was more dead than alive..worse than ever, he agreed to do the reunion. When the paps asked him at one point on his way from the dermatologyst’s office (3 weeks before the tragedy) if he will perform with his brothers, he said „Yes!” in a slightly and naturally vexed way, like to say „Now leave me alone!..”…many family members, including Janet (who said he was the one ‚on the fence’ with regard to the reunion) pushed him into doing that…And many were like „If he doesn’t do that with his family..or take them with him on stage, he’s so selfish…or just a has-been). Like that bodyguard said…those pressures were always on his shoulders, and you’d think at least his family would care for him only, as their flesh and blood. So, why wouldn’t he isolate himself at some point from all that? He’d always tell them he loved them, as they have said it, and they knew, everythime they saw him they knew. Jermaine said it. Marlon did, Tito did too….why wasn’t that enough?..If some claim they had an intervention planned for him (saying that to the tabloids also, what a wise choice!...), then why would they also pressure him as always for that reunion? La Toya and Jackie also spoke of that plan during one event. They had been asking him since forever. What kind of an intervention was that, if there ever was one, since Jermaine himself seemed unaware of his medical record or problems and genuinely so? He would've been the first to intervene, if that was the case, since he said he hates any form of medication. Would the intervention pressures then sound like: "Michael, seek help, but please do that reunion with your family!".........??...And they said were eager to see him on stage at the TII shows too before.....it doesn't make sense....but the reunion pressures.

(2)


He accepted the AEG ill-fated 02 concerts first after 2 years of repeated refusals…then he thought about the children seeing him in concerts and fulfilling his many fans’ wishes of touring again, and if he was still on it, he might have as well spread out a very important message for the world, that we’ll lose it soon if we don’t do something about it…at the press conference, he looked so stressed out and wanted to appear the opposite, and had the air of doing the concerts solely for the purpose of pleasing the fans, as he looked slightly disgusted at the idea of touring again…imagine the tremendous pressure. He wanted to surprise everyone with 2 albums he was recording and working on since 2005 or 2006, even though he always made music…when many didn’t even believe he was doing sth, and kept telling or yelling he’s lazy, a has-been, a retiree old man…and now as a junkie, apparently, or a person aut of it, without real concerns for his own life. When he risked it for us, he wanted to stay alive for his children and fans, who were his world..when those notes appeared from him, many thought they came from a drunkard or sth, sign that his messages and, at times, his love seriously, weren’t taken that seriously and says that so to make sure we hadn’t forgotten him….when he seriously loved us more and said repeatedly how we were his inspiration and lifelong support, and without whom he would have been gone a long time before. Naive? I don’t think so. He was more conscious of everything and everyone than all. He would pay attention to even a blade of grass, a strand of hair. On exiting the car, before announcing the 02 concerts, his attention diverted to a nearby car; he would stop to analyse and see and even feel everything. But he couldn’t monitor everything like God can. He had to focus on too many things and did so great at that…unbelievably well. On being a best father, on his creativity, on music, then the concerts, on further planning to help other people, create more places for abandoned or ill children, like Tohme Tohme sais, on working on so many different projects…and all that up until his very last day, until he dropped. So how could he monitor everything, really? When it’s almost unreal how he could be so focused on so many things, even unimportant or that others would forget about or not pay attention to. And he was indeed excited about life..he wanted to sat awake for the world, for his children, for life whom he valued so much and clinged to it so hard. In spite of the almost neverending ordeals and roadblocks that would kills or demonize anybody. How could he see who was real and who was not? When he’d fire many because of that…and he would get sued left and right, so he’d entrust others to handle things for him better, he’d entrust those claiming they’d protect him with handling his business and personal affairs while he was so BUSY doing everything else…And is it his fault that he chose to trust people and had the bad luck to gather so many crooks? When he wanted to see the good in all people and even inspire them to be better people, but he had to take chances if he wanted to do all these things, too. So he took them and got burned. He risked his reputation to offer unconditional love and support to children and their families, listening to his pure, good heart instead of reason..instead of confort. What a „diva” he was..

What better people to choose? His brother , Randy, had a partner that wanted to push him into a project DURING the trial, causing him a lot of distress, and that is only one example, as Joe Jackson had his shady people he claimed reliable, like that Majestik guy or Rowe, who didn't have anyone's interests at heart but theirs, and did other bad business choices with the whole Don King-Victory Tour organization fiasco...it's well known the family weren't business experts, and Michael only wanted a family, not business partners. Even his longtime nanny, Grace Rwwamba (sp?), ended up betraying him. Her loyal friend did her best to defend her friend, not Michael, after the leak of that interview (even though she said „many” things of what transpired in that interview weren’t true), when she, the nanny, was the one who went to London to a journalist and tell her biased side of story..typically of what a disgruntled employee would say. So what did she think: „I’ll go to Daphne, a most sensationalist journalist and trust her as a friend with my story, and she’ll never tell a word”. Wth?…Really?…Out of all people on the planet. Before his 02 concerts, before the chance of a new life for him, in an obvious attempt to smear his name like too many others that claim they loved him. Not to mention one showing their true colors that way wasn’t totally reliable, so she was sacked. She was paid for her services, and when seeing what afanatic she was in her youth, prestige also was involved. People lose their minds when Michael jackson fires them. „I tried to save him”..sure, everybody did. Everybody were his saviours, he was a freaking, braindead wreck. Just like Tohme Tohme said, that he tried to protect him (and was the money-obsessed snake who told the auction people to take more items than necessary, as they’d ‚bring more money’, causing him to use strong words in the suit on behalf of MJJ Productions to get them back for him, seeing he was busted), Randy Phillips, Raymone Bain, some more alleged friends..everyone acted as they were his saviours, when all they cared was money and prestige first of all. They all tried to „save” him and claimed they were his best friend. And he put all his trust in them..

Who the hell to really trust?…You become confused after having so many people telling you different things, you have to fire some, than hire some others, than fire these too, as they weren't reliable or were crooks, then re-hire the old ones, like he did recently too...And one wastes so much time dealing with such pressures from all possible sides...you don't know anymore...not just that, but there is no one really having your best interests in the biz world. And if he had admitted publicly or to the fans he had deep pains from all these pressures and insecurities (as is only normal to have, because of everything that happened to him ever since he was little), all the media would’ve caught fire, the titles would’ve gone (as though they didn’t already): „He is a has-been for sure. He’ll soon die. No concerts, no nothing. The end is imminent”..and he still would’ve lost, it would’ve been unprecedented scrutiny, causing panick among the fans, not to mention to the sufferer himself. Others would’ve said „I knew he couldn’t do it..I never thought he would anyway”, or if he himself said ‚no’ to the concerts..he’d think he had let down the fans and that was the last thing he wanted…He'd often swallow his pains and try to stifle them while performing, avoiding at all costs to display his pains to the world. ”Don’t disapoint the audience!”, the magical words from Joe Jackson would’ve resounded in and hit his head again..just like they did when he learned about the terrible false allegations in ‚93, yet he kept on performing on stage, or after he fell with the bridge in ‚99 and broke his ribs and almost died…Just like during the trial, when although he was strong, he was hurting endlessly…Just like he forever did. Just like now….It would’ve been devastating for him knowing people worry, it would’ve caused him panic attacks and he would’ve pushed himself even harder to show his strength and do it for those who love him…At least he passed doing what he loved…adjusting to the idea he would go to London eventually, and to the too many concerts he’d have to make..because he had the children and his fans by his side and the world in his mind, and he’d leave something unforgetable for them..He binded his soul to his work to achieve immortality.

(3)

He passed trying so hard and suceeding also in performing again, as he could, with better than ever stage and song ideas, with stronger than ever messages..though he didn’t have to. He had a message all along, a voice all along that too many ignored or didn’t know about. In the position he was in…it’s like he couldn’t win…and the media, in spite of such a tremendous sacrifice, they don’t even acknowledge it…How could a man survive and live for 50 years in spite of so much distress, many betrayals, health problems…you have to numb the pain and one still wouldn’t have made it this long. In a way, medication helped him all along somehow. Yes, they did. Because feeling pshysical and emotional pain of the depth and urgency he suffered would’ve damaged the heart more rapidly than anything..physical pain, for instance, it is felt in the heart too, especially when it’s ruthless. And he was in the business for 43 years, always making music. Nobody from the media is mentioning the need for those medication. As for the stronger ones, the doctors will somehow pay for this one way or the other. If not in this life, then in the next life. He wanted to remain alive so badly for us and show us how much he loved us by working on all those projects. And the greedy people around it made profit of that and pushed him to the max, also knowing his perfectionism. And they appear on TV claiming, all of them how they tried to help him. Liars that they are. As though it would help his image, knowing the media’s and stimes the general public’s distorted perception of one who had to take medication..but they call them drugs with a purpose, to portray him a mindless junkie. If they really cared about him, they wouldn’t claim to have been friends and feel the tabloids like that with stories, even exaggerated things, also collected via hearsay, AND not mentioning anything about the reason for which he took medication…just that he got pumped. As though he’d have a conscience and strength to pay attention to things like even the less audible questions (i.e. while in his car, answering fans’ questions and telling them to take care and watch their hands…)…why did Tito have to speak up, too?…and most likely having his replies distorted….why go to tabloids, God?…Michael was the most intelligent of all….

How can one eat when one can’t sleep properly or forget to drink liquids at times because you’re so engrossed and committed as he was in his work for others?..Especially on the eve of touring, like that former Sony excecutive confirmed, and like Michael himself always had….The „Michael, please tour the USA”, „Please, come to Australia” petitions, „Please, come to Europe”, „Tour Congo..Trinidad” requests and pleadings and petitions didn’t help at all either…It also didn’t help that some fans were showering him with love even after exiting the doctor’s office (which are private visits anyway), him seeing this and being so touched at times, by all that love in general, that he’ll write ‚I am living for you’…such a gratitude that he couldn’t leave it in words only..but in action, too. Action that many fans were requesting, some were even discrediting (like previously in other tours….as though he were feeling too well and still managing to put on great shows). By accounts of medicine people, he wasn’t allowed to tour again after Bad. He had throat problems and could develop cancer on it if he continued to sing and force his voice…he did the best he could so as not to disapoint the audience…again..until he fainted and had to be fed intravenuously. And some wonder why he IV-ed at times, thinking it must have been just medication….So, he had no choice. If he didn’t do the concerts, many fans would be disapointed…I mean, come on…a few dates were moved (that, after few months before, nobody even thought he’d thought of ever singing again, let alone performing too) and some / quite many blamed it on Michael, when 2 months of rehearsals only is way too little for anyone, not to mention for a perfectionist as him…AEG were shoving the concerts on his throar, claiming they cared for the fans, adding more and more, and then immediately starting to sell tickets, with little to no regards over his well-being or opinion or need to practice more…and basically to protect him as they so falsely claimed. He was an insitution, a really big, hard one…Tohme also said he was an institution before he died..than claimed he was his friend…How rapidly people can ‚adapt’ and change their tune…Philips himself said in one interview that Michael said on the phone ‚How many shows do I have do to, Randy?”…and the heartbreaking: „No more shows, Randy, no more shows”…..it was horrible reading those, and Philips was talking as that had been nothing to him. If he didn’t postpone some concerts (or Ortega, or whoever did), and he’d appear rushed at the actual concerts, unprepared, not himself and stressed, people would have moaned again like they did many times before. So he incorporated so many elements to please Everyone, as a fan would want this, a fan that other thing…spectacle, no spectacle, but just music..well, as long as he is there, who needs live music, he’s there..I won’t go to a show that’s not live…I have seen him only 3 times..I’ve seen him once and the show has to be perfect, or I’ll want my money back…There was never pure satisfaction…and now we hear stories like „We tried to save him”, „He look disgustingly skinny” in so many words ect..reading how that fan expressed herself (however concerned she was) and just posting that describtion (in so many words), describing the bones seen through the tight white blouse and expressing disgust basically was beyond inappropriate..but that’s another story. And everyone’s perception can be so different. In those TII rehearsal photos, he didn’t look skinnier than always or even too skinny, he looked exhausted, because working for so many hours and at 50 is a lot, a whole lot…and until the morning, 12 o’clock…which is ridiculous and such a disconsideration for any man’s health. How can a person sleep with the adrenaline risen to the max?….To cope with that much pressure? And he’d say he’d think all the time…With all the visuals alive in the mind, with having to find time for his most beloved beings, his children….How could he please everyone?..if he pleased himself more, and took more care of himself (which he did too, the best he could) lots would call him selfish, of course…And I find it highly disturbing reading how some viewing him before looking so ‚vibrant’ and happy and in control now come up with these conspiracy theories, and that he was actually miserable and isolated and used…and after the ‚story’ of that poster came that they saw him looking „worse” than ever, those saying before that how great he looked are changing their tune…It must be just being wrong at first. Confusion and chaos everywhere.

And was he ever understood fully by people, no matter who they were? When he'd speak about healing the world, appearing on a funeral, talking of serious business, what was more important? What he said, or what was he wearing? Did many really take him seriously when he was repeating like a chatterbox "I love you"?...many would say: "I wish he'd change his speeches, they're all too repetitive"...If he said he hated touring, many would go: 'But that's what an artist is supposed to do...he said he'll stop touring after Bad, then he always came, don't take him that seriously"...when it was confirmed even by that Sony exec..often , people seem to rely on what OTHERS say about him, as Michael, well...he always says the same things, right? If he said he was hurting from the handcuffs or was closed in the bathroom, many would go: "He always exaggerates things...oh, we still love you, Michael"...When he'd cry on stage EVERY time he'd sing emotional songs like "I\ll Be There" or "She's Out Of My Life", most would say he'd fake it, as it's impossible to show emotion every single time you perform the same songs, that he\s a good actor and knows how to deliver...when he was always real...as though he didn't have reason to cry every time. Even his childhood anguish was underestimated, many saying he was a happy kid and that other kids get beaten too, with no consideration on how it's going to affect those children, whether differently or not, some even going as far to defend the beater's actions...When there were rumors of songs like Heal The World to be created, a lot were having cringeworthy moments in their heart and even expressed them, prefering club bangers and not 'boring', 'cheesy' songs that were always meant to educate the masses that don't really listen to anything 'cringeworthy' anymore, as it's not 'cool'. When 'confronted' with the thoughts that there will be more potential songs on his pure love for children, many replies would be "He should know better by now after the allegations than to write those type of songs"..basically limiting his creativity, his soul..everything..as though the unfair trial didn't...when it killed him every day, never really getting over that unnecessary ordeal. That is what he received for showing love and helping people....If he portrayed himself as Peter Pan, many would go 'We should know by now that after seeing the porn mags hiddedn at Neverland, that place was everything but Neverland..and he's no Peter Pan, he's a man"...Really, a man only? That has countless of children toys, Disneyana, an amusement park outside, animals, children's books, hangs around with children a lot and all that he confessed about that and how he showed up to lots of people. That was only an image, right? And as though there should be something disgusting about a man (a lonely one, too, that he was) having adult magazines in his home (as though that were a crime) when he was taken in clubs from age 9 to perform and would see all the nakedness and all sin displayed before him, and he'd still be a real man (because that is what being a real man consists in) to go warn some fans to stay away from intercourse with his brothers. He'd see/hear even his father doing that, and some would find what he had shocking, while others would just call him 'a man like any other'. He was contested and his actions questioned and ridiculed and magnified all the time, no wonder. It hurts that it also had to be the people one would not really expect to do that too. There was a teenager that shared Michael was that loving that he'd even have people like his make-up artist share his bed with him and not for sex, the same as when some children (out there with their families) did the same, them always wanting to come to his room, by the way. So, of course, if women, men and children, animals, objects, whatever it was, entered the doors/gates of his room, in one way or another innuendo would be attached. If he was seen with a woman once: "They're dating, having sex..and he pretends to be innocent"..same with the rest; if Brooke Shields, his friend, said they'd talk in the middle of the night, they'd say "That's just an excuse for him to ask to get laid", and since he talked with many at late hours, men, children, wives of other men etc..it would've probably meant the same, I gather. There was a photo of a young man exiting the gates of his home some months ago, and hell broke loose: 'Michael, you never learn..."....as though, anyone that would be sure there was nothing more than one of the billion visits people made into his home would say that. If he was sued for something: "He isn't perfect, he is not God" would often be heard, without bothering to check for facts or just give that severely betrayed man the benefit of a doubt..When his children were masked (the sole purpose being of him trying to protect them at all costs from the paps), the replies would go: "But they're old enough now".."Can the breathe?".."Poor Blanket".."The masks are ridiculous"....how long would they have to wear them?...If he was having some KFC at times, many would assume he's having it all the time...then go around saying he's so skinny, I wish I could feed him. If he had something on his face, he'd be picked apart in analysis: "What is that, a strand of hair, saliva, a spot?"....and not even after his death can he be left alone....All of a sudden, it's okay to show the children to the world, wonder or proof they're his because their eyes looks similar to his, but wait, I think they actually are Dr. Klein's children, as Paris has his ears; his sex life speculated to the maximum should be an open debate, as he's not here anymore, we should at least be able to talk now...how much money was he owned?..."What did he have in his brain when he died?"..he was anorexic, not, but he looked good, he looked so vibrant, but wait, I told you he wasn't feeding himself and looked all bones and got all pumped up with pills behind closed doors and we tried to help him.....we told you he wasn't well, just like people on TV always say now, like it's some sort of a rage.

Will this ever stop?....Does it sound too harsh now? It's the reality, sorry to say it, but it is. Fact is, he and his actions, and his pains were never pondered on and understood fully by anyone but his children who really loved him unconditionally. The outer world always asked for something, however big or small, in spite of the much genuine love that was sincerely spread out by them.

He wasn’t given a choice. He might have had one if he was not notorious and would, therefore, have, somehow, more people looking at him and him only for who he is really, where he wouldn't have to look over his shoulder every time. A man with so many responsibilities and drawn into so many directions all at once couldn’t be given a choice. Even if he didn’t do a thing anymore and focused on his health (though no one here can predict he could’ve survived for sure in spite of that, because he had more problems than he could remember…so many lawsuits that many were filing for pure greed..any heart could give up just like that..) and his children entirely, he would have been followed everywhere all the time….and he wouldn’t have been able to just sit..he would’ve wanted to do things for the fans one way or the other…And if shady crooks were blackmailing him one way or the other, telling him that it’s a do-or-die thing, which it was….the stress level can’t be stopped…with so many lawsuits also started by so many crooks, with an ever-hostile media and too few genuine friends…and he fought like madness all the time. How could anyone survive this..and for as long as he did? He fought until he dropped, just like he’d dance until he dropped, helped others until he had foresaken himself and loved in spite of being hurt…it was a responsibility felt deep within him that was his destiny, a vow and he couldn’t help being sacrificial. Like he also told that executive, if helping children with all his heart meant they’ll see that as a thing worthy of jail time…then so be it. He wasn’t naive. To this world, maybe. But in God’s eyes, he was a most beloved child, worthy of praise. One can’t bring more criticism of that nature to such a genuinely good soul..who wanted to desperately see that there can be good people in this world, in spite of initial perception…to connect, and, perhaps even more than this: he couldn’t be a million people to monitor everything and everyone, so he he had to trust somebody, in order to make the great things he did. He was wise, as he would’ve preferred to die than let anyone down or feel he couldn’t do more. And for such a good, rare man, there are always many demons crawling…and his innocence and purity of soul and self-control (that was discredited and still is by many, unfortunately, even those which you wouldn’t expect) remained intact and even flourished. It was inevitable. He clung unto the wonders of childlike innocence in some ways which at times were deemed as obssessive (i.e, when he’d request, for instance, to the fans: „Please, send me more pictures of children…”) just for this very point: to preserve and nurture this most important aspect of life so many others take for granted…because the temptations, oportunities to become a wasted, unaware person, a dead one or just like the rest that tried hurting him were endlessly large…so again, pressures at every step, visible, invisible. He clinged on to innocence. He kept buying toy planes, being amazed at what little children are, at colorful balls, butterflies or pyjamas. He clinged on to things many deemed weird, when in fact were most purest and natural for one in his unique situation to survive. There is no real way to explain how difficult his life has been..and for some to be amazed that he would need medication (not drugs, like the media wants to spin it, meaning substance abuse)..he would need it for too many reasons. And he still lived for 50 years. And without a really genuine friend or soulmate or someone who could feel at one with would…and by the accounts of many who spoke to him in the middle the night, he was so lonely, and being betrayed so often would deepen that emptiness inevitably…That incredible heartache was in one way or the other too big…that as tragic as it may sound, only God would take it from him. And He did.

But he was happy, too…and the media will never acknowledge that. He was happy even on the day before his last one…seeing the concept of the shows coming to life…Practically all those people have a point somehow: he was both happy and sad or less energetic…he was happy knowing he’d serve his fans and the world again and excited to be given that oportunity….sad and fearful that he may not be good enough, stronger than ever so he’d push himself more and more for such a tremendous responsibility, with a show that was to become his best ever…and with the most fervent will to succeed…There was so much love, and so much hate too…So he was a Superman, not from the point of view that he was superhuman, but of one withstanding so many ordeals from enemies with such dignity, power, faith, love and innocence, and wanting to please and help as many as he could before himself, and all the children, and he did so much of that. He did more than one would think possible, and whatever happened to him in this life was his destiny. „And then I tried to please them so, / But how far can this pleasing go?”….Bless his soul…




This was, I guess, just a general cry out to the world...and the effect of feeling horrible after the flight of such a rarest soul. The contents of the world to me now are gray..