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PEople taking advantage of his kindness

Nen

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One thing that I have been wondering since becoming a new fan is, we know Michael was a good hearted caring gentle person, and it was genuine. How then, did he not get completely taken advantage of all the time?
There are plenty of people out there just wanting to leech onto someone like that, and just use them for what they can get out of them. I know I have experienced it and it really isn't good.
He did sometimes, I read the GQ article about the child molestation accusations from that Chandler guy, and in this instance it seems to me that he really did get the kindness he showed to that boy thrown back in his face.

I guess what I really wonder is how did he not become a cynical bitter person because of this? It is hard once you have been "burned" so many times to not become that way. Did he just give a lot, and found out along the way through hard experience who he had to stay away from, and who he could trust?
 
I think he did become skeptical and dare I say even a bit paranoid as the years went on. And could you not be? As you said, he'd been burned by children, whom he loved so much. He dealt with people suing him for the most ridiculous reasons. People who interviewed him and seemed to be on his side, turned out to make him look real bad in front of millions around the world. I think he did become a bit cynical, but the remarkable thing is that he never lost his faith in humanity. In the 60 Minutes interview, he still defended Gavin (2nd accuser) saying that he was a good kid and the accusations weren't coming from him, but from someone else. He never failed to see the good in things and people. Thats how I think he managed to go on each day. I think he focused on the positives: his kids, his craft, and his fans. But I don't think he ever fully put his trust in anyone after the second trial and that Bashir interview.
 
Re: People taking advantage of his kindness

Yeah I don't see how he could really fully trust most people, especially after the trials. I bet he felt really betrayed. Its just sad how so many will take advantage/push kind hearted people to get what they want.
 
The level of kindess that Michael showed astounds me. I love him for being so compassionate, forgiving and kind, but i wish he got more aggressive and outwardly pissed off more. He gave away so much.
 
Nen said:
I guess what I really wonder is how did he not become a cynical bitter person because of this? It is hard once you have been "burned" so many times to not become that way. Did he just give a lot, and found out along the way through hard experience who he had to stay away from, and who he could trust?
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I think he did turn bitter at the end. He sold Neverland and never wanted to see it again. That coming from him is a brutal change in his heart and mind. I do think he lost his faith even in kids a little bit by the end (with the exception of his own children).
 
D.S said:
The level of kindess that Michael showed astounds me. I love him for being so compassionate, forgiving and kind, but i wish he got more aggressive and outwardly pissed off more. He gave away so much.
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I think he was trying to be the opposite of Joseph, who was those things. I've also noticed that some of the people he hung around weren't pushovers like James Brown, Paul McCartney, Madonna, Frank Sinatra, and Lisa Marie. But Mike had to be aggressive & ruthless to some extent, you can't really make it in show business by being nice and submissive all the time (unless you're Mr. Fred Rogers, lol). Show business has always been shady. Back in the old days, it was mostly run by the mafia & crooks, today it's conglomerates and businessmen who are still crooks.
 
He wanted to believe that all children are innocent. Knowing children are his softspot, greedy people used that against him.
 
I just don't see how like you say DuranDuran, how he could not have to be somewhat aggressive especially in the music industry where I am sure many wanted to push their own agendas on him.
 
VanX said:
I think he did become skeptical and dare I say even a bit paranoid as the years went on. And could you not be? As you said, he'd been burned by children, whom he loved so much. He dealt with people suing him for the most ridiculous reasons. People who interviewed him and seemed to be on his side, turned out to make him look real bad in front of millions around the world. I think he did become a bit cynical, but the remarkable thing is that he never lost his faith in humanity. In the 60 Minutes interview, he still defended Gavin (2nd accuser) saying that he was a good kid and the accusations weren't coming from him, but from someone else. He never failed to see the good in things and people. Thats how I think he managed to go on each day. I think he focused on the positives: his kids, his craft, and his fans. But I don't think he ever fully put his trust in anyone after the second trial and that Bashir interview.
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Gavin was and still is a nasty piece of work. However, what goes around comes around Gavin.
 
DuranDuran said:
I think he was trying to be the opposite of Joseph, who was those things. I've also noticed that some of the people he hung around weren't pushovers like James Brown, Paul McCartney, Madonna, Frank Sinatra, and Lisa Marie. But Mike had to be aggressive & ruthless to some extent, you can't really make it in show business by being nice and submissive all the time (unless you're Mr. Fred Rogers, lol). Show business has always been shady. Back in the old days, it was mostly run by the mafia & crooks, today it's conglomerates and businessmen who are still crooks.
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Well said.
 
Seven said:
He wanted to believe that all children are innocent. Knowing children are his softspot, greedy people used that against him.
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And this is where the problem lay. Michael was use do to dealing with crooks and thieves in terms of adults (He told Randy that when Rand wa upset about someone badmouthing Randy. Michael said that is the nature of the business.); however, when people used their children to falsely accused him, that was where everything hurted the most.
 
Nen said:
One thing that I have been wondering since becoming a new fan is, we know Michael was a good hearted caring gentle person, and it was genuine. How then, did he not get completely taken advantage of all the time?
There are plenty of people out there just wanting to leech onto someone like that, and just use them for what they can get out of them. I know I have experienced it and it really isn't good.
He did sometimes, I read the GQ article about the child molestation accusations from that Chandler guy, and in this instance it seems to me that he really did get the kindness he showed to that boy thrown back in his face.

I guess what I really wonder is how did he not become a cynical bitter person because of this? It is hard once you have been "burned" so many times to not become that way. Did he just give a lot, and found out along the way through hard experience who he had to stay away from, and who he could trust?
Click to expand...

I think he did become skeptical but also deep down knew that there still are some nice people out there. I'm a kind person and get walked over lots myself. At times I've thought 'I might as well be a b*tch, I'll do better' than I know that deep down that is just not me and I can't stop being nice whatever people say or do to me. Michael stayed true to himself and that makes me love him even more.
 
DuranDuran said:
I think he was trying to be the opposite of Joseph, who was those things. I've also noticed that some of the people he hung around weren't pushovers like James Brown, Paul McCartney, Madonna, Frank Sinatra, and Lisa Marie. But Mike had to be aggressive & ruthless to some extent, you can't really make it in show business by being nice and submissive all the time (unless you're Mr. Fred Rogers, lol). Show business has always been shady. Back in the old days, it was mostly run by the mafia & crooks, today it's conglomerates and businessmen who are still crooks.
Click to expand...

He wasn't a push over, its just when Michael spoke out he was silenced by the record company not helping to promote him(and now possibly killing him for money...) and the media turning against him after false allegations http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aW1T1DZdWrA

It is right what you say about the industry, I used to work in it and do deal with it still today as a music photographer and its a shame that music has to be part of a business at all but because music appeals to most people and is a natural creative reaction and touches the soul, a lot of money is made from that. I suppose too that Michael would not have reached so many without having the platform given to him by a major company to promote his work and to put on the type of tours that he did. At times though now I wish he had been a smaller artist who helped charities and had a happy family life away from the spotlight, for his sake and the children's sake not ours.
 
myfavouritewintercoat said:
He wasn't a push over, its just when Michael spoke out he was silenced by the record company not helping to promote him(and now possibly killing him for money...) and the media turning against him after false allegations http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aW1T1DZdWrA

It is right what you say about the industry, I used to work in it and do deal with it still today as a music photographer and its a shame that music has to be part of a business at all but because music appeals to most people and is a natural creative reaction and touches the soul, a lot of money is made from that. I suppose too that Michael would not have reached so many without having the platform given to him by a major company to promote his work and to put on the type of tours that he did. At times though now I wish he had been a smaller artist who helped charities and had a happy family life away from the spotlight, for his sake and the children's sake not ours.
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I remember in the early 80's an interview with Robin Gibb of the Bee Gees and he was saying that Michael did not need what was happenning to him with Thriller i.e. the massive fame. At the time (as a very young kid) I dismissed his views. Looking back, I think he was right.
 
Seven said:
I remember in the early 80's an interview with Robin Gibb of the Bee Gees and he was saying that Michael did not need what was happenning to him with Thriller i.e. the massive fame. At the time (as a very young kid) I dismissed his views. Looking back, I think he was right.
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George Harrison kind of had this idea himself. He always said being in The Beatles was a nightmare and he hated being famous. When they broke up, he rarely did a lot of public things. When John Lennon was assassinated, he became even more reclusive.
 
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