Does anybody cry every single day??

bubbyduck4MJ

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It seems whenever I think deeply about Michael.. I just cry.. so I often put myself in denial about the truth or not thinking about it simply to get through it all, that's often how I cope with everything in my life that hurts. It's hard because I am a deep thinking person so I hate switching that off but I think sometimes we need to. :(

I love you all. and I am so sorry this hurts so bad. I think December has been hard because of the holiday season. I couldn't fathom how Christmas day would be okay because of 6 months, it was harder because my family doesn't understand so I couldn't talk to anyone. I know the day after I was at the beach and spent a lot of time collecting shells and writing his name, he is just in my heart always...
 

Tin Angel

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I cry in silence every single day and to me is worse, I don't let myself cry in front of people, they don't understand.
I send everyone a very big hug, especially for you, Billie Jean. We love you. :hug:
 

MJsBollywoodGirl7

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I still do cry over him every single day. Both on the inside and outside. Well there was that one day during this month where I didn't cry over Michael at all. Only because I have spent that entire day just being way too tired to want to cry over Michael. It was the only day where I had skipped. I was just crying over Michael nearly an hour ago. I am just so very miserable now that I no longer have Michael in my life. Which is why I am doing something which is something I will never thought I will see myself do. And that is drowning my absolute misery in food now. I will eat sometimes these big plateful of food. And I am not even hungry. I will never know any happiness and joy ever again. That was forever taken away from me on June 25th 2009. All I am going to know now is anger, sadness, and misery. Every single morning I wake up just feeling miserable now. Because I will look at my MJ posters in my room and it just a reminder of where he is now. But there is no way I am taking those posters of mine down. If anything I am slowly turning my room back in to a total MJ shrine again. It feels like it is something that I have to do now. Plus my room is the only place in the house where I feel the most closest to Michael.
 

xo_lola_xo

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Oh dear God this is so terrible.

I'm praying for Michael and everyone who is affected by his death.

I LOVE YOU ALL.
 

Eichhoerndli

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I don't cry everyday. I often cry when I see him on television, especially now with the end of the year coming. Because I know they're gonna bring something on him, I'll watch it and then I always have to cry. I don't know how long this is gonna last. but on the other hand I fear I will forget him If I don't cry anymore.I miss him so much and still can't believe he's gone.
 

Alyssa

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i dont cry all the time, just rant to myself, and sometimes make random videos talking about Michael, you know getting it all off my chest! i sit alone in my room at nights and pray to michael and talk to him. then sometimes i do cry, and cry like a mad woman.. :/
 

*Billie Jean*

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Aww.. My heart's really hurting... I've had some hard moments yesterday. I cried a lot... Every night I find it so hard to sleep, because I keep thinking about Michael. I don't know what else to do. I cry, cry, cry... It hurts. It is worse than any physical pain.. my heart is full of sadness. My eyes actually are burning from crying so much. It's still so surreal. I can't and don't want to believe he's gone. :weeping:

Love and hugs for you all..
 

oceanborn

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Hugs to you all guys :hug:

I thought I was doing better for a couple of months, but now I'm getting really depressed again. Don't know why, I guess it's because of letting go the year 2009... The last year Michael was here with us. I just can't believe it. I can't accept it.
Today I found myself crying on the buss on my way home. I was listening to one song of Enya on my mp3, called "May It Be" and it just reminded me of Michael... It made me think that that all this is so final, I should accept it and we are so helpless in front of everything that happened.

Will we ever be healed? Who would heal our broken hearts ? :cry:
 

twinklEE

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I sometimes think I'm a coward for not having ended my life already after his passing. I want to meet him soon. It's so hard to live in a Michaelless world. I just want to be where he is - wherever that is.
 

Tin Angel

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I sometimes think I'm a coward for not having ended my life already after his passing. I want to meet him soon. It's so hard to live in a Michaelless world. I just want to be where he is - wherever that is.

I feel the same. :cry: I don't know where he is but I wanna be there. :cry:
 

Tin Angel

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The thing is that I only need Michael to be able to live... :cry: So I want to go with him.
 

Sirena

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I still am. I haven't even skipped a day. And I have no clue when I'll get to the point where I don't cry everyday & it's a couple times a day. I just wrote some poetry about Michael like 5 minutes ago and cried while I was writing it. My tears fall, my heart is aching..though many months have passed, I still can't accept the truth that he is forever gone. I miss him more everyday. I miss him in every way. I am dying on the inside. I miss him with every piece of heart I have left.. :weeping:


AW... Billie Jean!! I did for about 3-4 months. About November or so - I stopped. Sometimes I cry - sometimes just a tear comes out.

He's with GOD now - and someday when our time comes when it's SUPPOSED to come, Michael will greet us with open arms & say "I love you more."

I've avoided things that make me break down. TO THIS DAY - I have not been able to watch the movie "This is IT" - not because I protested or anything like that, it's because it HURTS.

AND THE HURT IS REAL.

Mourning someone is like having an incurable chronic illness. Some days are better than others, but then there are days that are unbearable.

Hang in there, Billie. WE all know the pain - and we are all suffering with you.
 

*Billie Jean*

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Wish I could come here and say great things but truely I am fallen fast.. I am in tears over everything, I dont know what to do.. I can't bare this pain any longer - it's just too much.. I just want to die, too. :weeping:
 

*Billie Jean*

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AW... Billie Jean!! I did for about 3-4 months. About November or so - I stopped. Sometimes I cry - sometimes just a tear comes out.

He's with GOD now - and someday when our time comes when it's SUPPOSED to come, Michael will greet us with open arms & say "I love you more."

I've avoided things that make me break down. TO THIS DAY - I have not been able to watch the movie "This is IT" - not because I protested or anything like that, it's because it HURTS.

AND THE HURT IS REAL.

Mourning someone is like having an incurable chronic illness. Some days are better than others, but then there are days that are unbearable.

Hang in there, Billie. WE all know the pain - and we are all suffering with you.

Thanks. But it's too painful to bear. I'm so tired of trying... :weeping:
 

prettygirlmj

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AW... Billie Jean!! I did for about 3-4 months. About November or so - I stopped. Sometimes I cry - sometimes just a tear comes out.

He's with GOD now - and someday when our time comes when it's SUPPOSED to come, Michael will greet us with open arms & say "I love you more."

I've avoided things that make me break down. TO THIS DAY - I have not been able to watch the movie "This is IT" - not because I protested or anything like that, it's because it HURTS.

AND THE HURT IS REAL.

Mourning someone is like having an incurable chronic illness. Some days are better than others, but then there are days that are unbearable.

Hang in there, Billie. WE all know the pain - and we are all suffering with you.

I agree with you in everything. I went to see This Is It three times and all three times I had to walk out because the pain was too much. I barely lasted 10 mins into the film all 3 times. It's too soon for me. I understand why the family refuses to see this film. It's just to painful. Talking about it now I am crying.
 

amyzabeth

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Yes, I cry everyday. I try to hold in the tears but sometimes I just can't.. :( I just have him on my mind too much. Like when I think about how much sh!t he went through in his life I get really mad and then I cry "anger" tears. Or sometimes I think about his kids and get all sad, and then cry. So it just depends I guess....
 

MJsBollywoodGirl7

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I sometimes think I'm a coward for not having ended my life already after his passing. I want to meet him soon. It's so hard to live in a Michaelless world. I just want to be where he is - wherever that is.

So do I. I sometimes still wish I had died in that horrible car accident I was in when I was 16. This happen back in October of 1996. That way I will be up in Heaven with Michael right now. Instead of having to live through this constant torturous hell now. All that I can do now is just hope I die at an early age. They say the world is going to be ending on December 21st 2012. I so wish that had happen already. So I can finally be with my beloved Michael. I can't even begin to tell you of just how sad, miserable, and depressed I am now without Michael in my life. I had actually forgotten now of what it is like to be genuinely happy. The only person that can make me genuinely happy again is for God to give Michael back. But other than that I really got no more reason to ever really be happy ever again.
 
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