Michael Jackson's Curls.

The gorgeousness is just ridiculous. It will forever just destroy me that he didn't like the way he looked. It breaks my heart. He was breathtaking!
I know. Most people, I think, suffer from insecurities especially around their physical appearance. And our looks are never the most important thing about us. But, yeah, I also feel sad that Michael just couldn't see it. I understand why, of course I do. It's not hard to work out what's going on here. But, my god, the man was truly a work of art. I wouldn't have wanted him to be all up himself but I wish he could have at least understood what we can all see even if he couldn't quite accept it. Cos it sounds like he could not even *understand* that people found him beautiful.

That hurts. It probably shouldn't but it does.

Aww I hope you find it! I know this is redundant, but whenever you do find it again (I have full faith you someday will!) please share it (with the annotation that it's the one that got away lol).
If I ever find it, you'll all know about it. I'll probably create a freakin' thread for it, lol.
 
TheBadTour65.jpg
 
I know. Most people, I think, suffer from insecurities especially around their physical appearance. And our looks are never the most important thing about us. But, yeah, I also feel sad that Michael just couldn't see it. I understand why, of course I do. It's not hard to work out what's going on here. But, my god, the man was truly a work of art. I wouldn't have wanted him to be all up himself but I wish he could have at least understood what we can all see even if he couldn't quite accept it. Cos it sounds like he could not even *understand* that people found him beautiful.
Yeah I totally agree with all of this. Of course I wouldn't want him to be arrogant. I think part of his undeniable charm is the fact that he was shy and didn't fully understand why he had the effect on people that he did. But I wish he could have been at peace with his appearance more. People talk so often about the things he chose to change about himself, but there is so much he didn't choose to change and had no control over that would, understandably, impact someone's self esteem. But I will never forget in the Oprah interview (you probably heard this, even though you haven't watched it) when he says that he tries not to look in the mirror because he's never happy with what he sees, so he avoids it. That just breaks my heart.

Like you said, the man was an actual work of art. He was stunning. His smile was devastating and yet HE DIDN'T LIKE HIS SMILE!!! It's just crazy how something could be so objectively obvious to everyone else, and so impossible for him to grasp.

Final note on this: I constantly wonder what he actually thought of the way people swooned all over him. He seemed to take so much in stride, but I'm just trying to imagine what it was really like for him. I know I constantly reference him accepting awards and how much I love it. But I love it because he's so adorable and shy and his fans scream for him and he seems so delighted yet bashful about it. But you know he absolutely loves it. And I just... I can't imagine feeling bad about your appearance and then witnessing people literally faint in your presence, or fall obsessively in love with you... like, how did he rationalize in his mind why this was happening? Obviously his sex appeal is not his only appeal, or even his primary appeal. But it's MASSIVE. So what did he think was happening here? lol

That hurts. It probably shouldn't but it does.
It hurts me too. I totally get it.

If I ever find it, you'll all know about it. I'll probably create a freakin' thread for it, lol.
LOL yes please! "Michael blinking" can be another 18+ thread :ROFLMAO:
 
Like you said, the man was an actual work of art. He was stunning. His smile was devastating and yet HE DIDN'T LIKE HIS SMILE!!! It's just crazy how something could be so objectively obvious to everyone else, and so impossible for him to grasp.
I think it's in person's subconscious, and also perfectionists always tend to focus on the flaws. I am a perfectionist, so I can understand that part. Everyone would be gushing about how good you did and all you can think of is that one little thing that was not perfect. And it does not matter if it's 10 people or 100,000. And he also had so much negativity thrown at him. This has taught me to be very careful what I say to kids about their appearance.
 
I think it's in person's subconscious, and also perfectionists always tend to focus on the flaws. I am a perfectionist, so I can understand that part. Everyone would be gushing about how good you did and all you can think of is that one little thing that was not perfect. And it does not matter if it's 10 people or 100,000. And he also had so much negativity thrown at him. This has taught me to be very careful what I say to kids about their appearance.
I agree with all of this and can understand it. I think it's more that I'm not sure if there's any evidence that Michael ever changed his mind on this. Because most people (and Michael wasn't 'most people', obvs) get to a stage in their life where they are able to accept certain things about themselves. If you are insecure about your looks that probably won't change a whole lot. But, often, people can accept that they don't actually look as hideous as they have always thought. Or you can look back at your younger self and see that, actually, you looked just fine.

I accept that it's a lot more difficult for Michael than your average person and I don't want to oversimplify this but I wonder if he was ever able to arrive at a place of calm acceptance regarding his looks.

All of that said, I think it's freakin' marvellous that, given the level of insecurity he had seemed to have over his looks, he was still able to perform, still able to create so many iconic looks, still able to perform in front of a camera, still able to place himself in front of an audience of millions. He changed his image, created different characters, explored so many aspects of the human psyche. Whatever insecurities he had, he did not let them hold him back.
 
I think it's in person's subconscious, and also perfectionists always tend to focus on the flaws. I am a perfectionist, so I can understand that part. Everyone would be gushing about how good you did and all you can think of is that one little thing that was not perfect. And it does not matter if it's 10 people or 100,000. And he also had so much negativity thrown at him. This has taught me to be very careful what I say to kids about their appearance.
No, I completely agree with you on this. I am also a perfectionist, myself. It is one of the many things that makes me relate to Michael. But I guess what I was trying to say is that even though I understand his insecurities and whey they were so prevalent, it explodes my brain to try to fathom how someone SO excessively beautiful and attractive could be the person feeling that way. Like, I know these kinds of deeply embedded insecurities have no logic to them and that he was not capable of seeing what we saw. But his attractiveness is so blindingly objective, you know?

I agree with all of this and can understand it. I think it's more that I'm not sure if there's any evidence that Michael ever changed his mind on this. Because most people (and Michael wasn't 'most people', obvs) get to a stage in their life where they are able to accept certain things about themselves.
This is such a great point. This is what makes it so sad to me. It never got better. I watched this little documentary he did in the early 2000s that followed him as he visited Gary, Indiana again for the first time in forever. He was doing all these meet and greets and events, etc. And it was in that documentary that there was a voice over of him saying that he HATES his smile, but he does it for other people. And even though I understand, it's also so gut-wrenching because his smile is probably the most beautiful smile I've ever seen in my life. Shockingly so.

All of that said, I think it's freakin' marvellous that, given the level of insecurity he had seemed to have over his looks, he was still able to perform, still able to create so many iconic looks, still able to perform in front of a camera, still able to place himself in front of an audience of millions. He changed his image, created different characters, explored so many aspects of the human psyche. Whatever insecurities he had, he did not let them hold him back.

Absolutely! When you consider the fact that his artistry is so visual and how much he embraced the visual elements of it, as well as becoming a fashion icon, it's just incredible. He didn't let anything hold him back. It's just another example of how brilliant he was and how strong he was.

For example, I have thought before about doing a reaction channel on YouTube specifically to react to Michael because I love reaction videos, in theory, but I am constantly disappointed in people being so effing calm when they watch him lol. You have seen my reactions on here in writing -- just imagine how insane I am in person! lol So I thought, "wow, that would be a great channel and so much fun!" but then what always stops me is insecurity about my appearance and knowing that I am too sensitive at this point in my life to really take criticism in stride. And I'm not sure if that insecurity is based in reality, but it holds me back. And this is on the smallest scale where literally no one would probably even watch the videos. It amazes me that he did what he did when I truly think he struggles with his appearance probably twice as much as I struggle with mine.
 
I can imagine what it was like to be that close to him, which is not something that I can typically fathom with other photos. This might sound crazy, but something about this photo makes me think he probably smelled really, really good that night lol.
This is all FYI ...

Over the years I've read various bits and bobs about how Michael always smelled beautiful. It's gone midnight over here so is officially the 25th. Don't know if posting stuff about Michael's perfume preferences seems out of order. Hope not, this is where I seem to be, atm.

Here is a conversation I found here on the board:

1 - and to know that he also smells so good !!! it's tortue !
2 - Would you PLEASE tell me more??? PLEEEAAASSSEEEE.....
3 - Apparently, his dancers on TII said he smelled incredible
4 - I've heard the same.I have some Bav,and Black Orchid...both of which he wore...and they are incredible.I can only imagine what they smell like mixed in with his natural scent.Both are intoxicating and feminine but masculine..Bav smells strong at first,but changes as the day goes on,and smells very nice.A lot of people don't care for it,well I've run across a lot,and I think it's because they might not be buying the real one..there are a lot of knockoffs out there,and they don't smell the same at all.I love both,but Black Orchid is incredible,very heady,and sexy,and my favorite out of the two.It's feminine as well but then changes to just pure,exotic,sexy manliness once you wear it for a bit...it's quite an experience.I have to look for my link,but like I said,I'd watch what site you order off of...it can be expensive but worth it knowing it's the real deal.I spray mine around my room and on my pillow at night...very sweet dreams.:wub:

Here is some stuff from Isabelle Petitjean's blog:

I had learned of Michael's passion for perfume, and expensive perfumes in particular. I had never been interested in them myself, not having the budget and not seeing the point of paying for expensive perfumes when standard eaux de toilette were just fine. So I wrote down a list of the perfumes he used to soak his clothes, rinse his clothes, perfume the rooms he was in or simply soak himself in, because, by dint of putting them on, he didn't smell anymore, like everyone else in this situation, and he used them in large doses. He had been wearing it for 30 years. A good old French perfume that smelled, I think, "old bourgeoisie", another one, more spicy, that he had worn during the rehearsals of This Is It in particular, another one, which was used for his laundry, others more occasional... I learned, thanks to him, what perfume represented... An extension of oneself. A form of aura, made sensitive... A presence which survives you when you are not there anymore... A fragment of your soul, which says a lot about you, through its fragrances, spicy or sweet, heady or light...

I went into a famous shop in Nice to ask about their mythical fragrances…

I thought I would pass it off as a gift for my husband, who was accompanying me... It was bad luck, it was only women's perfumes! Holy Michael, should we be surprised? Again, this will not to compartmentalize anything... During my visit of this store, my ear was suddenly challenged by a familiar music... The loudspeakers of the store began to play a cover version of "Man in the Mirror" that I had never heard before, in a salsa mode. Already there, I was seized... It was funny!

As I couldn't find the old French perfume that he had supposedly been using for over 30 years, I asked a saleswoman if she had any. She explained to me that this perfume had not been manufactured for 10 years but that she was going to see if she had any left in stock. So I waited for a few long minutes, listening with a smile to this musical cover that seemed to beckon me... But what was my surprise when the saleswoman came back to me and said: "Did you order it from us some time ago? I told her no, it wasn't me. She explained to me that she had one bottle left in stock, which had been ordered a few months ago by a person who had never come to pick it up... She was about to return it to the supplier. So she was going to sell it to me. Unbelievable! I was stunned...

OK, so from Isabelle Petitjean's blog I learned that two of the perfumes Michael used were:

1 - Bal a Versailles (sp?)
2 - Black Orchid by Tom Ford
 
@zinniabooklover Dear that was so lovely! And yes, those were the two fragrances he did use, the most familiar ones. No joke, I went to Sephora and bought the travel bottle of Tom Ford's Black Orchid, the black decorative bottles were women's and the gold toned was the men's. To my knowledge, Michael wore the women's one, I must say the women's smells so much better compared to the men's, and I definitely envisioned Michael wearing it! 🥰 And end of my driveling lol 🤣
 
@zinniabooklover Dear that was so lovely! And yes, those were the two fragrances he did use, the most familiar ones. No joke, I went to Sephora and bought the travel bottle of Tom Ford's Black Orchid, the black decorative bottles were women's and the gold toned was the men's. To my knowledge, Michael wore the women's one, I must say the women's smells so much better compared to the men's, and I definitely envisioned Michael wearing it! 🥰 And end of my driveling lol 🤣
I saw photos of two bottles but couldn't post them for some reason. Gotta say I enjoyed those descriptions of the fragrances, it kinda brought Michael to life. Not that he isn't ... oh, you know what I mean. Still very humid over here, still can't sleep or think straight or anything!

I think it's cool that you have some of the Black Orchid. A different way to connect to him. ❤️
 
This is all FYI ...

Over the years I've read various bits and bobs about how Michael always smelled beautiful. It's gone midnight over here so is officially the 25th. Don't know if posting stuff about Michael's perfume preferences seems out of order. Hope not, this is where I seem to be, atm.
Wait...how is it the 25th there? It's still the 23rd here!

Either way, tbh, I am dreading the 25th. I feel so emotional about it already. I have a family event I have to go to during the day, but a big part of me wants to just be home on my computer all day feeling sad and talking to other fans, thinking about Michael, etc. Sounds kinda pathetic, but I just want to feel fully present in realizing the loss, but I also feel like that's not good for me. Hard to explain.

Needless to say, this post is absolutely amazing!

Here is a conversation I found here on the board:

1 - and to know that he also smells so good !!! it's tortue !
I thoroughly agree with this! This is going to sound kind of obvious, probably, but despite being really into sweat (Michael's lol) I am also really, really into people being clean lol. I think everyone is, but according to my friends and husband, I am A LOT more into it than other people. I just love the smell of soap on people and the freshness of it. I also love when people naturally smell good, but I'm a big fan of perfume/cologne also, so long as it's tasteful. I guess what I'm saying is that I am VERY sensory and super effected by scent. Extremely so.

Anyway, Michael is someone who always looks like he's just super fresh and delicious smelling lol. I don't know why. He just always appears so great. Probably the fact that he was such an impeccable dresser and had such a fresh, exciting style. So when it gets confirmed that he did in fact smell so good, it DOES feel like torture lol. I can just imagine how it would feel to hug him, and feel him, and take in his scent, etc... god. This is borderline embarrassing.

(yes...I can say I want to light myself on fire when I look at him, but THIS I am embarrassed by 🤷‍♀️ )

2 - Would you PLEASE tell me more??? PLEEEAAASSSEEEE.....
3 - Apparently, his dancers on TII said he smelled incredible
4 - I've heard the same.I have some Bav,and Black Orchid...both of which he wore...and they are incredible.I can only imagine what they smell like mixed in with his natural scent.Both are intoxicating and feminine but masculine..Bav smells strong at first,but changes as the day goes on,and smells very nice.A lot of people don't care for it,well I've run across a lot,and I think it's because they might not be buying the real one..there are a lot of knockoffs out there,and they don't smell the same at all.I love both,but Black Orchid is incredible,very heady,and sexy,and my favorite out of the two.It's feminine as well but then changes to just pure,exotic,sexy manliness once you wear it for a bit...it's quite an experience.I have to look for my link,but like I said,I'd watch what site you order off of...it can be expensive but worth it knowing it's the real deal.I spray mine around my room and on my pillow at night...very sweet dreams.:wub:
God, I love all of this so much. So so much.

OK, so from Isabelle Petitjean's blog I learned that two of the perfumes Michael used were:

1 - Bal a Versailles (sp?)
2 - Black Orchid by Tom Ford
This is amazing and it absolutely gives me something to look for! And can I say how much I love that he was never someone who was limited by the gender binaries. He liked what he liked and that's what he went for. It didn't matter to him how it was labeled. He was seemingly that way with everything. That alone is so sexy to me.
 
@zinniabooklover Dear that was so lovely! And yes, those were the two fragrances he did use, the most familiar ones. No joke, I went to Sephora and bought the travel bottle of Tom Ford's Black Orchid, the black decorative bottles were women's and the gold toned was the men's. To my knowledge, Michael wore the women's one, I must say the women's smells so much better compared to the men's, and I definitely envisioned Michael wearing it! 🥰 And end of my driveling lol 🤣
I LOVE THIS. Do you ever wear it just to feel close to him? Or do you mostly just have it as a keepsake?
 
Anyway, Michael is someone who always looks like he's just super fresh and delicious smelling lol. I don't know why. He just always appears so great. Probably the fact that he was such an impeccable dresser and had such a fresh, exciting style. So when it gets confirmed that he did in fact smell so good, it DOES feel like torture lol. I can just imagine how it would feel to hug him, and feel him, and take in his scent, etc... god. This is borderline embarrassing.
No, it makes sense. The whole thing about Michael smelling so lovely can get me going more than almost anything else. I'm rubbish at fantasies so I can't really imagine being in the same space as Michael but the aroma thing makes it just a little bit easier to imagine, makes it more tangible, iyswim.

Also, the idea that his own personal loveliness was somehow echoed in his choice of perfume. I really like that.
 
I saw photos of two bottles but couldn't post them for some reason. Gotta say I enjoyed those descriptions of the fragrances, it kinda brought Michael to life. Not that he isn't ... oh, you know what I mean. Still very humid over here, still can't sleep or think straight or anything!

I think it's cool that you have some of the Black Orchid. A different way to connect to him. ❤️
Here are the bottles lol
bal-a-versailles.jpg

black-orchid.webp

I loved the descriptions of them as well, not only unique, but very special it does bring him to life ❤️

We just got hit with some rain here finally, and by god it's humid, wet and windy lol!

It really does feel like a connection to him, I was just so bogglingly curious that I just had to take a chance lol and to me a little goes such a long way but it's definitely Michael 🥰

I LOVE THIS. Do you ever wear it just to feel close to him? Or do you mostly just have it as a keepsake?
Honestly both! I literally feel that ambiance about his spirit, I know that may sound funky but I'm a believer in those things, it's like as if being there. Also like the way it reminds you of something or someone, like mom's signature perfume scent or grandma's cookies kind of thing lol
 
Honestly both! I literally feel that ambiance about his spirit, I know that may sound funky but I'm a believer in those things, it's like as if being there. Also like the way it reminds you of something or someone, like mom's signature perfume scent or grandma's cookies kind of thing lol
That's kinda what I was just trying to say to sw23 about the idea of fragrances making it easier for me to imagine Michael in any meaningful way.
 
Honestly both! I literally feel that ambiance about his spirit, I know that may sound funky but I'm a believer in those things, it's like as if being there. Also like the way it reminds you of something or someone, like mom's signature perfume scent or grandma's cookies kind of thing lol
Thank you for sharing the photos of the bottles! Also, I don't think any of this sounds funky lol. I completely understand and feel that way too. I feel like a person's scent is so much of their essence of aliveness. It's one of the things you ache for when you no longer have someone. So being able to actually access that scent is amazing. I am definitely going to seek these out. I might even go to Ulta tomorrow lol
 
Thank you for sharing the photos of the bottles! Also, I don't think any of this sounds funky lol. I completely understand and feel that way too. I feel like a person's scent is so much of their essence of aliveness. It's one of the things you ache for when you no longer have someone. So being able to actually access that scent is amazing. I am definitely going to seek these out. I might even go to Ulta tomorrow lol
Exactly! 🥰

Ulta has very limited selection on Tom Ford, but I know Sephora carries it in store and online lol!
 
1 - Thank you! I can imagine how he smells... When he was in munich and I met him he smelt like vanilla. So sexy! My little Vanilla bean.... *lol*
2 - Last time I met him it was a mix between cinnamon and Black Orchid. The vanilla scent I´ve felt too, not sure it came from a perfume though.
3 - I've read so many times that he smelled like a mix between vanilla and baby powder :wub:

OK, so this is the rest of the conversation that I didn't include last night cos it might trigger industrial amounts of envy since these peeps presumably did actually meet Michael. Otoh, interesting info. Useful and interesting.

Cinnamon and vanilla? Love both of those aromas and so easy to imagine. Looked up Black Orchid and can see it contains almost all of my fave essential oil fragrances - patchouli, sandalwood, vetiver, vanilla, ylang ylang, jasmine. There's loads of others in there as well but these are the ones for me. I used to use all of these all the time. With the base notes you have to be careful cos they are heavy and they are tree resins so a very small amount goes a very long way. Vetiver and patchouli, in particular, you have to be very careful with. If you get the patchouli wrong you'll end up smelling like some rank old hippie from the 60's (trust me, you don't want that, lol).

Getting conflicting stories from the web as to whether Black Orchid is - or possibly is not - available to purchase. But at least I now have in my 'aroma mind' the key fragrances that I can focus on.

Also looked up the Bal a Versailles perfume. Similar list of essential oils which is what I expected:

sandalwood, vetiver, ylang ylang, patchouli, jasmine, vanilla.

But, and here's the kicker, it also contains neroli. OMG!!!! Neroli is beyond. Expensive but worth every penny. It's better, imho, than the most expensive rose essential oil.

@staywild23 you said this:
I also love when people naturally smell good, but I'm a big fan of perfume/cologne also, so long as it's tasteful. I guess what I'm saying is that I am VERY sensory and super effected by scent. Extremely so.

I've never been big on perfume, as such. Maybe because I couldn't afford super expensive ones and wasn't really into the cheaper stuff. But used to be into my essential oils big time. Sometimes combining them but often using them as single fragrances. I can relate to your statement here so much.

Anyway. Apologies for endless rambling. This whole perfume thing has kicked off all sorts of stuff in my mind.
 
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"And did you know it was purportedly (so his personal makeup artist says) the signature scent of none other than Michael Jackson…? Yes, really!"

Just found this on the Perfume Society webpage. I was looking for more info on Bal a Versailles.

Sorry, girls. Really sorry! I am obsessed with this whole perfume thing. It's going to take some doing getting it out of my system. Don't really do the essential oils thing anymore so am like a starving woman suddenly introduced to glorious feast.
 
"And did you know it was purportedly (so his personal makeup artist says) the signature scent of none other than Michael Jackson…? Yes, really!"

Just found this on the Perfume Society webpage. I was looking for more info on Bal a Versailles.

Sorry, girls. Really sorry! I am obsessed with this whole perfume thing. It's going to take some doing getting it out of my system. Don't really do the essential oils thing anymore so am like a starving woman suddenly introduced to glorious feast.
Oh dear don't be sorry! This is all so intriguing and interesting, I literally went through rabbit holes with that and still do lol
 
Oh dear don't be sorry! This is all so intriguing and interesting, I literally went through rabbit holes with that and still do lol
I got to smell Black Orchid today. Tbh, I'm not sure about it. Started off smelling glorious. Then it went through a phase where I wasn't so keen. Then it calmed down and was easier to live with. Now I'm undecided but leaning towards, 'I don't think this is me'. I'm really glad I have had an experience with it and it's fascinating thinking about Michael using it. But I'm not sure it works on my skin. It's pretty expensive so I'd need to like it a lot more if I was going to splash out.

That said, it's certainly interesting finding out what proper expensive perfume is like. It's a whole other world, lol.

I really want to try the BaV cos it has neroli in it. It must be super-posh and super expensive because the saleswoman helping me with the Black Orchid thing (I didn't buy any, just tested it) had never heard of BaV.
 
I got to smell Black Orchid today. Tbh, I'm not sure about it. Started off smelling glorious. Then it went through a phase where I wasn't so keen. Then it calmed down and was easier to live with. Now I'm undecided but leaning towards, 'I don't think this is me'. I'm really glad I have had an experience with it and it's fascinating thinking about Michael using it. But I'm not sure it works on my skin. It's pretty expensive so I'd need to like it a lot more if I was going to splash out.

That said, it's certainly interesting finding out what proper expensive perfume is like. It's a whole other world, lol.

I really want to try the BaV cos it has neroli in it. It must be super-posh and super expensive because the saleswoman helping me with the Black Orchid thing (I didn't buy any, just tested it) had never heard of BaV.
Oh I know, I was the exact same way about it too, but I felt so intrigued by it. That's why I got the small travel spray to be smart but reasonable we know it's not cheap lol but like I said a little goes a long way. Definitely more suitable for the fall/winter for sure due to it's potency.

It's just crazy how many forms of perfume/cologne there are lol it is another world.

BaV should be very interesting!
 
Oh I know, I was the exact same way about it too, but I felt so intrigued by it. That's why I got the small travel spray to be smart but reasonable we know it's not cheap lol but like I said a little goes a long way. Definitely more suitable for the fall/winter for sure due to it's potency.

It's just crazy how many forms of perfume/cologne there are lol it is another world.

BaV should be very interesting!
Sadly, over here there is no small spray version. At least, not in the shop I was in. I was really hoping for a small bottle of eau de toilette because it's cheaper and less potent but they don't do it. And, yeah, def an autumn winter scent. We actually had some rain today and the air was a bit fresher but still totally the wrong time of year and wrong weather for that type of perfume. Just not a good match. But it made me think of Michael so it's all good.
 
Sadly, over here there is no small spray version. At least, not in the shop I was in. I was really hoping for a small bottle of eau de toilette because it's cheaper and less potent but they don't do it. And, yeah, def an autumn winter scent. We actually had some rain today and the air was a bit fresher but still totally the wrong time of year and wrong weather for that type of perfume. Just not a good match. But it made me think of Michael so it's all good.
Awe what the deuce lol I wonder if over there you have Sephora? I know they have the different sizes and the travel sprays, I don't believe I've seen the Tom Ford line do eau de toilette, mostly parfums. But yes definitely Michael. :love:
 
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