Sorry...But I Have to Get It Out

Lilith

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I don't know where to start :( I don't want to seem like an attention seeker...

I'm feeling very lonely, I normaly write to Michael to get my feelings out but it's not helping any more like it used to. I'm feeling like I'm fully alone and I don't really know who to talk to, I always tell my friends everything but some part of me is scared that they wouldn't understand and just tell me to get over it. For the past few weeks I have been crying myself to sleep and I have had to take sleeping aids to help me sleep and a herble medication my step-grandmother got me to help stop the crying just so I could get to sleep without crying. Every song I have been listening to have started reminding me of MJ no matter what the lyrics are. I have been having really wierd dreams and most of them are not very great, I guess you could say I have been having nightmares, mostly about the most strangest things, last night I had a nightmare where I woke up crying and I was scared to go back to sleep, and I haven't had a nightmare that bad since I was about 7. I haven't got anyone to talk to and I feel like I'm stuck inside a very dark box. Whenever I try to talk to someone about it, it feels like they aren't even listening to me, and I feel ignored, kind of like a b*st*rd child in a family group or something.

Just feels like no-one understands me, I feel so alone
crymore.gif
 
I'm afraid I can't help that much, but just wanted to say you are not alone :huggy:

If there's something I have learned since Michael's passing, it's the fact that you should allow yourself to feel even the weirdest feelings you have about all this. At some point I was asking myself if it was actually right to be still sad and crying, because I don't think I felt so devastated after e.g. my grandmother died though I had actually known her all my life...but then I realized if that is how I feel, that is the way it is. There is no right or wrong way.

Michael Jackson touched our lives in such a deep and profound way, it's not easy to cope with the loss or to explain it to others who don't feel the same way about him. Be true to yourself, give yourself time and opportunity to feel whatever it is you're feeling. If you have someone to talk to, that's great, if not, there's always MJJC and all the great people here. And keep talking/writing to Michael, even if it feels at the moment it's not helping that much, maybe at some point you will find more comfort in that again..

Keep the Faith. And take care of yourself.
 
where are you from? probably you'll be able to find other fans in your area. it really helps to be among fans...

stay strong. hugs!

very song I have been listening to have started reminding me of MJ no matter what the lyrics are.

I can relate to that. That's the reason why I don't listen to anybody else but MJ these days..
 
There are quite a lot of fans from Australia on this board! Perhaps you should start a thread for Australian fans if there isn't such a thread here yet :)
 
You are not alone! You're here with your MJJC family! :group: :heart: We understand how you feel... Sending over lots of love and strength! :heart: :huggy:
Take care!
Diana xx
 
Here is a thread for Australian and NZ fans
http://www.mjjcommunity.com/forum/showthread.php?t=70851
I think we are many who think of Michael every day ,listen to his music and even small details remind us of him.
For me it can be to see white socks in the shop, to see a tree etc
You can always come to MJJC ,here are people from different countries,ages, with different opinions but we are united in our love for Michael and here people understand there is nothing strange about to love a man you never met.
Have you seen this thread
http://www.mjjcommunity.com/forum/showthread.php?t=45942
 
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