Dear Michael,
why is it that i have this urge to speak to you... yet, when i try to voice out my thoughts, i get dazzeled and dumbstruck as if the feelings i have for you need to be expressed in another laugauge that is more expressive than words and closer to the ear than sounds.. and nearer to the heart than heartbeats...
Michael, i am now in phase of cofusion with the best i could produce is questions. i know life is about unanswered questions, but sometime it's just too painful to be walking in a world of utter confusion. you see, somebody pretended it was you and they played it so well and made me endlessly connected to you emotionally. it's useless to discuss what happend, i guess. it doesnt make sense to me why i was chosen to be in such a game since all my feelings for you were real and you were a part of my life... a star that is shining on me, but is too far that i can never reach. but i was fine with that, i thought i had your light touching me in my solitude, comoforting my pain in my agony and re-building my hopes when get broken. and on my part, i thought that even if you don't know me, that something of my heart is reaching out to you and that my caring thoughts are surrounding you somehow.. putting a smile on your face with a gentle spring breeze for example or a bird singing to wake you up.......i thuoght that that is how we will always communicate, never meeting eachother but sharing kindness and care...
but when this person played me and made it real... it became so hard for me now to go a step back...
why you? is it coz you are the greatest star in the world, is it coz you are the kop, the angel with a heavenly voice, the amaizng dancer ....is it coz of this that i feel so strongly about you? i don't think so... coz if that was the case, i would have felt other things, i would have craved to be blinded by your jewelry and stardom status...
i think there is something else... but i know you would ask, "ok, so what is it? when you don't even know me?"...
i am just like you trying to find the answer now.....
Michael, you touch the depth of my heart that noone has ever reached before...
you have my dreams...