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I feel trapped, please help

Jenny_MJforever

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Jul 25, 2011
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Skellefteå, Sweden
Hi everybody. i need to get this off my chest beacuse its been bugging me for a very long time now. I live in northern sweden in a town called Skellefteå (try to pronounce that lol) and it has about 35.000 inhabitants. sweden is a pretty big country, but with only nine million people living here.ever since i became an mj fan at around 11 years of age, i've felt so trapped living here. its to far away from everything, i mean its like 9 hours time difference to L.A and even London is soo far away from me. and i really dont know what to do. i wanted to be a part of the trial, but i was to little and lived too far away. i wanted to be a part of the concerts, but again, i live too far away.

i want to be close to michael, i want to be in L.A or london with other fans, both to help myself in my healing process but also meeting other fans and be supportive. it kills me that i'm trapped in this little town, since i feel like i have noone to talk to about michael. i know one girl here that is as mj fanatic as me, but she's in london right now, supporting michael and meeting fans. that is the kind of thing i want to do, but i have school and stuff here so i really cant to anything about it, and it HURTS so bad, and it feels in a way that i'm letting michael down with not following my dreams and not supporting him and his family in L.A during these times. i want to be near him in every way i can, and by living here, i'm no where near to being close to him.

i am so grateful that i have mjjc and all wonderful fans i've met here, beacuse they are the ONLY ones who understands what i'm going through. i dont know what to do anymore, i just want to go away from this horrible town and meet mj fans, and see the world. i feel like this is the thing i really want to do now, beacuse i know that here i'm in no way of feeling better about this damn nightmare and i will never heal when i'm here.

i'm in my final year in school, but i know that this year will be so hard, and i really dont know how to get through it. i feel that i'm close to an emotional breakdown and i'm no where near of getting better. please help me, what should i do?
 
I feel trapped too :(
I sent you a message please read it
 
Jenny_MJforever said:
i am so grateful that i have mjjc and all wonderful fans i've met here, beacuse they are the ONLY ones who understands what i'm going through. i dont know what to do anymore, i just want to go away from this horrible town and meet mj fans, and see the world. i feel like this is the thing i really want to do now, beacuse i know that here i'm in no way of feeling better about this damn nightmare and i will never heal when i'm here.
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I so 100% understand what you feel here. Living in Québec city where you're been called stupid, crazy or suicidal when you say you're a MJ fan, so far from the others, no way to take part of gaterings, special MJ events or anything like that. I so want to live somewhere else to be around many fans. Feel so totally isolated from 'the world', the 'MJ world' here. By chance I have MJJC, but it's not the same. Feels so good to hang aroung with other MJ fans. Need that.
 
Yea, I feel the same. I mean I live in Florida, and I'm pretty sure there are many MJ fans here, I just don't know any.
 
noha said:
I feel trapped too :(
I sent you a message please read it
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yeah i read it, and i really want to say that i didnt mean it that i'm having it much worse than everyone else, i just ment that i hate the feeling of being helpless, of not being able to do what i want. i love my coutry and i am so proud of where i come from, and i know that people have it much worse in other countries.

Carinemjj said:
I so 100% understand what you feel here. Living in Québec city where you're been called stupid, crazy or suicidal when you say you're a MJ fan, so far from the others, no way to take part of gaterings, special MJ events or anything like that. I so want to live somewhere else to be around many fans. Feel so totally isolated from 'the world', the 'MJ world' here. By chance I have MJJC, but it's not the same. Feels so good to hang aroung with other MJ fans. Need that.
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yeah thats exacly how i feel. if i say that i'm a member of a mj forum people see me as weird, and its really not accepted to be 'fanatic' about someone. if i told someone that i love mj and that i've been crying like every night since he died people would think that i was so crazy and weird... i hate that i cant be accepted for what i love and for what i do :(
 
Guys *group hugs*. Listen, I know it must be hard for those of us who feel quite isolated from the rest, or if there are no other MJ fans around your area to talk to. I hope the MJJC forum is helping you all express how you feel cos its not good to bottle all these emotions up.

Find comfort in the knowledge that Michael's spirit and energy is all around, you don't need to be in London or LA to feel him. That kind of energy can be found in the wind, the stars, the sea, flowers, everything that encapsulates energy and nature, it will never die.

If any of you want to PM me just for a chat about how you're feeling, I'd love to hear from you. Just remember you are not alone in this, there are many people here you can talk to. Talk to Michael as well, I do. It helps, honestly. Go outside with some of his music and just feel him all around you.

Hope this helps you all feel a little better, I know it must be hard for you all but we are like a big family here going through the same thing, so we can all help each other through it.

Some day you will visit Neverland and the O2 but know that Michael is never far from you, if you call on him.
 
i feel exactly this way.
and it's so hurtful...
here are no fan-clubs and no fan meetings...
i always wished just to breath with the same air, michael did.

i feel i'm isolated, like i'm in prison
here even is not michaels original CD..

my country is so small and so far away from active world...
but i'm so thankful i have this forum... i feel i'm near you.

how lucky you are, who live in USA or England. i'm really happy for you....
:)
 
SUSIE.Q said:
Guys *group hugs*. Listen, I know it must be hard for those of us who feel quite isolated from the rest, or if there are no other MJ fans around your area to talk to. I hope the MJJC forum is helping you all express how you feel cos its not good to bottle all these emotions up.

Find comfort in the knowledge that Michael's spirit and energy is all around, you don't need to be in London or LA to feel him. That kind of energy can be found in the wind, the stars, the sea, flowers, everything that encapsulates energy and nature, it will never die.

If any of you want to PM me just for a chat about how you're feeling, I'd love to hear from you. Just remember you are not alone in this, there are many people here you can talk to. Talk to Michael as well, I do. It helps, honestly. Go outside with some of his music and just feel him all around you.

Hope this helps you all feel a little better, I know it must be hard for you all but we are like a big family here going through the same thing, so we can all help each other through it.

Some day you will visit Neverland and the O2 but know that Michael is never far from you, if you call on him.
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I love the gif in your siggy :wub:
 
Awww my Jenny :hug:

I know that you still have one year left of high school, and it will be a very long year, but have you ever thought of studying abroad for college/university?? You could come to California or you could go to London if you still felt like you really needed to get out and break away from Sweden. Just a thought!

But besides that, you always have all of us here :) Some of us are writing letters back and forth, pen pals lol. Maybe you should consider that! Whenever you are sad just write a letter to someone and stick it in the mail. It is a small thing but it always makes me feel better. Plus most people love getting mail that is not a bill! :)

I am always here to talk to!! Keep on writing too, it makes you feel better (as you already know) I promsie! :)
 
Really sorry you're feeling trapped Jenny :( :huggy:

I tried pronouncing that and failed :p But it made me laugh trying to do it in the process :D If you wanna keep in contact just add me to any of the below or PM and we could write :)
 
strawberrypie999 said:
Awww my Jenny :hug:

I know that you still have one year left of high school, and it will be a very long year, but have you ever thought of studying abroad for college/university?? You could come to California or you could go to London if you still felt like you really needed to get out and break away from Sweden. Just a thought!

But besides that, you always have all of us here :) Some of us are writing letters back and forth, pen pals lol. Maybe you should consider that! Whenever you are sad just write a letter to someone and stick it in the mail. It is a small thing but it always makes me feel better. Plus most people love getting mail that is not a bill! :)

I am always here to talk to!! Keep on writing too, it makes you feel better (as you already know) I promsie! :)
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always so kind words casey :hug: but yeah, i've been planning both going to london and the us after school, but i have no idea of how to finance it :lol: I really wanna work/study in america beacuse english is my fav subject, so yeah maybe i'll end up there later. i have no idea where, but thats a later problem hehe.

good idea with the pen pal thing. i love writing and i think it would be great to have someone to write to.

thrillerchild said:
Really sorry you're feeling trapped Jenny :( :huggy:

I tried pronouncing that and failed :p But it made me laugh trying to do it in the process :D If you wanna keep in contact just add me to any of the below or PM and we could write :)
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lol yeah most fails at that, but its like schee-le-fteå lmao :lol:
 
A lot of times if you are going to study abroad you enroll in a University in your country and then you enroll in a study abroad program. You finance it just like you would finance going to University where you live. Loans, Grants, Scholarships. There are some students who do just one semester or several years in America. Some students plan to only do a year and end up living here. So, it's not impossible! It just takes a lot of planning! So if it's something you are actually seriously interested in start planning accordingly :) Stuff in the US is kind of pricey!
 
i just wanted to say thank you to all of you. i've gotten to know some really wonderful fans over here, and it really made me feel less trapped here in sweden. i know i will have the opportunity to go out into the world soon and meet up with mj fans. but i wish i could have done that a few years ago. its all so frustrating. i'm going to london in june, beacuse i know i wont be able to get through the 25th on my own. i hope to meet some of you over there.

thank you for being so supportive, members of mjjc.
 
Honey I can't read your post right now because I have to go, I'm in a hurry but you can send me a PM if you like.

I'll read this thread and reply when I get back.

L.O.V.E.
 
Look forward to meeting you next year Jen ;) Maybe you could tell me more about your local Ice Hockey team ;)
 
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