Dating Within the MJ Community

[Graynbow]

Interesting topic, I have made bad experiences with dating an MJ fan, but...well

I suspect you experienced what I'm a little nervous about, someone else mentioned earlier in this thread how a lot of MJ fans are selfish (which to me is probably where the term "fanatic" is more directed at? *shrug*)

Agreed, he wasn't actually *that* weird, he was just abnormally extremely comfortable in his own skin (at least on stage, probably more insecure in day-to-day/internally), making his own creative choices, and functioning like almost any human being would if they were born on the stage and lived on it practically their entire existance and treated like a possession to take/keep rather than a person by soooo many people.

But I think it's important not to judge and to accept anyone for what he/she/... is. Or at least tolerate people... I always try to live my life how I want it and I also want everyone else to live their lifes how they want it. Who am I to judge? As long as you don't affect someone else's life in a negative way, you do you. I wish more people would understand that... but I guess it is easier to pick on other people than taking care of their own problems.

I'd say tolerance is just a mask for unprocessed hate tho... like when people say "love the sinner, hate the sin", we all know that's kinda bull most of the time, but its the most "politically correct" way to say "I 'love' you, but I need to section you up into pieces so I don't get your (insert whatever thing they actually don't like you for here) cooties on me."
But yeah if you can't be at least respectful by moving on and just not engaging (unless you actually have to because its your job or something, then you really do have to engage fully), then sure, tolerance is "enough" on an individual level.

 

[someplace_else]

I suspect you experienced what I'm a little nervous about, someone else mentioned earlier in this thread how a lot of MJ fans are selfish (which to me is probably where the term "fanatic" is more directed at? *shrug*)

No, he was extremely jealous of Michael and then basically of everyone and everything in my life who/what made me happy and was important to me. But I am out of there for some years now, so I am back

Agreed, he wasn't actually *that* weird, he was just abnormally extremely comfortable in his own skin (at least on stage, probably more insecure in day-to-day/internally), making his own creative choices, and functioning like almost any human being would if they were born on the stage and lived on it practically their entire existance and treated like a possession to take/keep rather than a person by soooo many people

I think most people wouldn't have been able to live his life...I really admire how he dealt with everything.

I'd say tolerance is just a mask for unprocessed hate tho... like when people say "love the sinner, hate the sin", we all know that's kinda bull most of the time, but its the most "politically correct" way to say "I 'love' you, but I need to section you up into pieces so I don't get your (insert whatever thing they actually don't like you for here) cooties on me."
But yeah if you can't be at least respectful by moving on and just not engaging (unless you actually have to because its your job or something, then you really do have to engage fully), then sure, tolerance is "enough" on an individual level.

Of course, acceptance is the goal. But I also think for some people that is hard to do because then they would have to question their whole attitude and turn their lifes around - and who does that? Very few people. But I hope with future generations the situation will get better and there will be more acceptance. Even if the world is making a turn in the other direction now...hope this is just a short term thing

 

[Graynbow]

No, he was extremely jealous of Michael and then basically of everyone and everything in my life who/what made me happy and was important to me. But I am out of there for some years now, so I am back


I think most people wouldn't have been able to live his life...I really admire how he dealt with everything.


Of course, acceptance is the goal. But I also think for some people that is hard to do because then they would have to question their whole attitude and turn their lifes around - and who does that? Very few people. But I hope with future generations the situation will get better and there will be more acceptance. Even if the world is making a turn in the other direction now...hope this is just a short term thing

sorry about your experience dating an extremely ick fan... that's a lot of narrow-mindedness

I agree, he handled it so much better than most people could even begin to imagine if they were tested the way he was starting at 5 years old.

for sure! I just personally can't argue for tolerance as a stepping stone/meeting in the middle anymore. the more we fight for "luke warm"/half-assed justice, the longer the people affected have to "wait" for justice, and "justice delayed is justice denied" (Dr/Rev MLK Jr).
I mean even all the legal stuff going on for someone who is no longer here is WILD. It should never be possible because they're basing it on "previous wrongful acts" that were not proven and even denied at multiple periods of times and proven through the guy's book's meta-data that the story was wildly changed to fit a specific narrative.

"but its Michael Jackson," and every bigot and their followers/sympathizers want to see him (his Excellence, his non-conformity, his success of beating publishers at their own game, and all the united international love) torn to shreds, but even the kids in the newer generations today see the truth.

 

[someplace_else]

Yes, it's not fair and I totally get your point of view. I just found out for myself that sometimes it's better for me to accept that people are dumb don't want to really find out the truth/question their point of view, because otherwise it's not good for my mental health. I just try to surround myself with people who use their brain and who are empathic.

 

[wendijane]

I married the man of my life ... He adores Michael's music.
But of course he does't understand my love for Michael ... No one in my "real life" does
Thats why i live my internet life (friends) so much!

Although this thread is alive again i just wanna quick bump it

After Michael's death it brought my hub and me in seriuous problems ...

this

He could not understand ( he tried!) and i guess i wasn't able to explain ..
After a battle of 1 year about my

my ...?

ok ...I wish you could come back and continue writing ..