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[FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]It's 25 years since Thriller moonwalked to the top of the charts, and still no one can beat it. Peter Robinson counts the ways it changed our world...[/FONT]
[FONT=Geneva,Arial,sans-serif] Saturday January 26, 2008[/FONT]
[FONT=Geneva,Arial,sans-serif]The Guardian [/FONT]
1. Use of the word tenderoni in pop songs
PYT (Pretty Young Thing) features the first recorded use of the word "tenderoni" in pop songs. It was most recently revived by Chromeo (pictured) for their notas- good-as-Fancy Footwork song Tenderoni, hence the name etc.
2. Songs which sound like Billie Jean
If it wasn't for Billie Jean, songs which sound like Billie Jean would not exist, or if they did, they wouldn't be accused of ripping off Billie Jean. Take a step forward, S Club 7's legendary Don't Stop Moving.
[FONT=Geneva,Arial,sans-serif] Saturday January 26, 2008[/FONT]
[FONT=Geneva,Arial,sans-serif]The Guardian [/FONT]
1. Use of the word tenderoni in pop songs
PYT (Pretty Young Thing) features the first recorded use of the word "tenderoni" in pop songs. It was most recently revived by Chromeo (pictured) for their notas- good-as-Fancy Footwork song Tenderoni, hence the name etc.
2. Songs which sound like Billie Jean
If it wasn't for Billie Jean, songs which sound like Billie Jean would not exist, or if they did, they wouldn't be accused of ripping off Billie Jean. Take a step forward, S Club 7's legendary Don't Stop Moving.
3. The Girl Is Mine 2008 by Michael Jackson with will.i.am
This is the single being released to plug the 25th anniversary reissue of Thriller, which also features new remixes as bonus tracks. "Much more than a classic remix," notes fansite MJ News Online. "Will and Michael have made it a song in its own right." This positive feedback is easily one of the Top 10 Most Outlandish Claims In The History Of Michael Jackson, because the new version is complete rubbish.
4. Gloves
During the Thriller campaign, Michael Jackson appeared with one hand wearing a five fingered "hat" - he called it a glove. Nowadays gloves are commonplace in most households and are worn by heads of state. They are also worn by serial killers.
5. Beat It 2008 by Michael Jackson with Fergie
Christ alive, if you think The Girl Is Mine 2008 sounds bad you should try this one for size.
6. Backwards walking
Jackson debuted the Moonwalk during the Thriller period, directly inspiring Coldplay's The Scientist video, and Time's Arrow.
7. The breaking of records
Claims that Thriller is a record breaker are in fact record-breakingly frequent themselves. It did quite well, though; Thriller was in the US Top 10 for 80 consecutive weeks, spent 37 at Number One and has gone 27 times platinum in the US alone. It is the best-selling studio album of all time. Basically, it did a bit better than the last Athlete album.
8. Rihanna's current single
Don't Stop The Music turns Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' into a sort of filter house track. ***** should have put stuff like this on the 25th anniversary re-release rather than just phoning ex-members of the Black Eyed Peas. LAZY.
9. Famous guitarists on pop records
If Eddie Van Halen hadn't played on Beat It, famous rock guitarists would never have guested on other people's pop records. Such instances include Slash playing on the intro to Black Or White by - hurrah! - Michael Jackson.
10. The career of Weird Al Yankovic
The non-hilarious American pop parodist scored his first big hit with Eat It. It was to the tune of Beat It but it was about eating. Later moments of genius included Fat - Bad, but about, erm, eating.
11. Expensive music videos
Billie Jean and Thriller's title track popularised the notion of expensive music videos being good, thus sending marketing budgets spiraling out of all control and killing music forever. Boo hoo.
12. Right Here by SWV
- The song sampled Human Nature. It was highly listenable. The end.
13. Thriller Live
This is a UK tour taking place in March. It celebrates the album and contains music, dancing and lights. Woo!
14. Slightly wordy academic deconstructions
Kobena Mercer's 1991 study Monster Metaphors: Notes on Michael Jackson's Thriller banged on about all sorts of things. Lord only knows what it would have contained had Mercer put pen to paper after that Jordy Chandler funnybusiness.
15. Completely milking an album to total death
Seven of the album's nine tracks were Top 10 hits in the States. Seven!!!
16. Paul McCartney
In 1982 Michael Jackson spotted the talents of unknown singer songwriter Paul McCartney and gave him a guest spot on The Girl Is Mine. In 2008 McCartney is still a household name thanks to that song's amazing talky bit.
17. Ricky Gervais
His Live - Animals DVD recreated the Thriller sleeve. It was funny because it was Ricky Gervais not Michael Jackson and it was clever because it involved a tiger and a tiger is an animal, making it and the content of the DVD thematically cohesive.
18. Zombies in music videos
Backstreet Boys' Everybody (Backstreet's Back) video was billed as a 1990s answer to Thriller. It had dancing zombies in it so this was not entirely misleading.
19. Billie Jean 2008 by Michael Jackson with Kanye West
This is alright though. Goes on a bit.
20. Victoria Beckham's eponymously entitled solo album...
... Featured a big cat on the sleeve. Surely no coincidence.
21. Prisoners having a dance
Several hundred prisoners at a detention centre in the Philippines recreated the Thriller video and became a YouTube hit last Autumn, pulling in such plaudits as LOL and WTF.
22. Positive public perception of indie artists claiming the first album they bought was Thriller.
It was actually Slippery When Wet.
23. Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' 2008' by Michael Jackson with Akon
Another rubbish new version on the Thriller re-release. The worst thing Akon has ever done.
24. Magic FM / Westlife / Radiohead
In the first ever review of the album, Rolling Stone noted that lead single The Girl Is Mine was a "wimpoid MOR ballad". As if that is a bad thing. Wimpoid MOR ballads RULE.
This is the single being released to plug the 25th anniversary reissue of Thriller, which also features new remixes as bonus tracks. "Much more than a classic remix," notes fansite MJ News Online. "Will and Michael have made it a song in its own right." This positive feedback is easily one of the Top 10 Most Outlandish Claims In The History Of Michael Jackson, because the new version is complete rubbish.
4. Gloves
During the Thriller campaign, Michael Jackson appeared with one hand wearing a five fingered "hat" - he called it a glove. Nowadays gloves are commonplace in most households and are worn by heads of state. They are also worn by serial killers.
5. Beat It 2008 by Michael Jackson with Fergie
Christ alive, if you think The Girl Is Mine 2008 sounds bad you should try this one for size.
6. Backwards walking
Jackson debuted the Moonwalk during the Thriller period, directly inspiring Coldplay's The Scientist video, and Time's Arrow.
7. The breaking of records
Claims that Thriller is a record breaker are in fact record-breakingly frequent themselves. It did quite well, though; Thriller was in the US Top 10 for 80 consecutive weeks, spent 37 at Number One and has gone 27 times platinum in the US alone. It is the best-selling studio album of all time. Basically, it did a bit better than the last Athlete album.
8. Rihanna's current single
Don't Stop The Music turns Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' into a sort of filter house track. ***** should have put stuff like this on the 25th anniversary re-release rather than just phoning ex-members of the Black Eyed Peas. LAZY.
9. Famous guitarists on pop records
If Eddie Van Halen hadn't played on Beat It, famous rock guitarists would never have guested on other people's pop records. Such instances include Slash playing on the intro to Black Or White by - hurrah! - Michael Jackson.
10. The career of Weird Al Yankovic
The non-hilarious American pop parodist scored his first big hit with Eat It. It was to the tune of Beat It but it was about eating. Later moments of genius included Fat - Bad, but about, erm, eating.
11. Expensive music videos
Billie Jean and Thriller's title track popularised the notion of expensive music videos being good, thus sending marketing budgets spiraling out of all control and killing music forever. Boo hoo.
12. Right Here by SWV
- The song sampled Human Nature. It was highly listenable. The end.
13. Thriller Live
This is a UK tour taking place in March. It celebrates the album and contains music, dancing and lights. Woo!
14. Slightly wordy academic deconstructions
Kobena Mercer's 1991 study Monster Metaphors: Notes on Michael Jackson's Thriller banged on about all sorts of things. Lord only knows what it would have contained had Mercer put pen to paper after that Jordy Chandler funnybusiness.
15. Completely milking an album to total death
Seven of the album's nine tracks were Top 10 hits in the States. Seven!!!
16. Paul McCartney
In 1982 Michael Jackson spotted the talents of unknown singer songwriter Paul McCartney and gave him a guest spot on The Girl Is Mine. In 2008 McCartney is still a household name thanks to that song's amazing talky bit.
17. Ricky Gervais
His Live - Animals DVD recreated the Thriller sleeve. It was funny because it was Ricky Gervais not Michael Jackson and it was clever because it involved a tiger and a tiger is an animal, making it and the content of the DVD thematically cohesive.
18. Zombies in music videos
Backstreet Boys' Everybody (Backstreet's Back) video was billed as a 1990s answer to Thriller. It had dancing zombies in it so this was not entirely misleading.
19. Billie Jean 2008 by Michael Jackson with Kanye West
This is alright though. Goes on a bit.
20. Victoria Beckham's eponymously entitled solo album...
... Featured a big cat on the sleeve. Surely no coincidence.
21. Prisoners having a dance
Several hundred prisoners at a detention centre in the Philippines recreated the Thriller video and became a YouTube hit last Autumn, pulling in such plaudits as LOL and WTF.
22. Positive public perception of indie artists claiming the first album they bought was Thriller.
It was actually Slippery When Wet.
23. Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' 2008' by Michael Jackson with Akon
Another rubbish new version on the Thriller re-release. The worst thing Akon has ever done.
24. Magic FM / Westlife / Radiohead
In the first ever review of the album, Rolling Stone noted that lead single The Girl Is Mine was a "wimpoid MOR ballad". As if that is a bad thing. Wimpoid MOR ballads RULE.
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opcorn:
