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My heart is broken...

TheDangerousFan

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Jul 25, 2011
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I don't know what happened!
I'm feeling so bad and it's becaming worse and worse.
It's all about Michael's passing.
I feel so empty now.
Part of me died!
He was the only thing in my life that I loved.
He was my idol, my God, my second father...
I was excited about the concerts so much...
I was telling everybody - He will show it to you.He is the best.He is going to make the greatest comeback ever!
Now I'm walking by the streets and some haters are looking at me so happy and they say - How is Michael doin?Not good ?He is dead!
God I felt so bad and my heart was broken again...
My soul is cold and I don't know what is going to happen.
I'm scared of thinking about the future.
My Michael is gone and the future is NO future to me!
Everything that happens is like a dream.
I can't realize that I'm not going to see another picture of him... I'm not going to see his smile again...
Little things make me agony...
When I heared that some band made a "unforgettable" concert I start crying...
It was 13th of July.
I had so many dreams about this day.
In that single moment... my heart, my soul, my whole world felt used... empty...
I can't beliеve that he is not the one who made"the unforgettable" concert!
I can't believe I saw a memorial service and not the greatest concert ever made!
I want him back so much and it's becaming painfull to me... I think I'm losing my mind
I'm not happy anymore... I have problems with my parents too.
They think that my love for Michael is some kind of madness and I can't take all of that...
 
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Your love for Michael is NOT "madness." For so many, he was like a cherished family member and the loss, and the grief, are that great. We, here, DO understand. If your grief is becoming worse, it's because reality is sinking in. We will all have to work through this, together, somehow.

Try not to discuss Michael with the haters if you possibly can avoid it. Keep talking to us here, because people here DO understand and support.

love,

Victoria
 
Victoria83 said:
Your love for Michael is NOT "madness." For so many, he was like a cherished family member and the loss, and the grief, are that great. We, here, DO understand. If your grief is becoming worse, it's because reality is sinking in. We will all have to work through this, together, somehow.

Try not to discuss Michael with the haters if you possibly can avoid it. Keep talking to us here, because people here DO understand and support.

love,

Victoria
Click to expand...

Thank you very much.
I know that it's not madness but they are not understanding me.I lost my inspiration for life, even the "life" for me is not the same.Thank you very much for the support!
 
I know what it's like. I feel so bad about what happened that I was thinking about taking my own life recently. My life is so messed up and without Michael in it, it's a whole lot worse.
 
I know, friend :( I have been to some pretty dark places in my head the last few days...first I was so sad my heart hurt, then I was sort of ok, then I was REALLY angry...now the last couple of days it's a mixture of all of it again....I know how you are hurting :(

it is so hard to accept we won't see him again :cry:
 
Miss_star said:
I know, friend :( I have been to some pretty dark places in my head the last few days...first I was so sad my heart hurt, then I was sort of ok, then I was REALLY angry...now the last couple of days it's a mixture of all of it again....I know how you are hurting :(

it is so hard to accept we won't see him again :cry:
Click to expand...

Yeah... I don't have power to live anymore! Thank you all for your support.
 
You pretty much describe the love that I have for Michael. When I heard about Michael's death a huge part of me died with him. Even though I was still in very much in denial. But my reality didn't come until the memorial service. Thats when I had felt my heart broke in to millions of tiny little pieces. Michael has been a huge part of my life for over 25 years now. I am 29 now so he has been a huge part of my life almost my entire life. I had always consider Michael like a father to me. Because he was always there when I needed him the most. And he always had a way of making me feel better when I am not well. I remember I once had streph throat and he help got rid of it for me. I still cry over him I was just doing that again today not that long ago. I am still in so much pain over losing him. Michael was the only person that I had ever truely love the most in the world. And I remember this promise I had made to myself back in December of 1995 when Michael was sick in the hospital. I remember how upset I was then but I told myself that if anything horrible should happen to Michael I was going to kill myself. Because I just couldn't imagine living in a world without my beloved Michael in it. And I really was going to go through with it. Then I realize Michael wouldn't want his fans killing themselves over him. Even though some already have. But it is still just so extremely hard to live in a world without him in it. I still so badly wish I was with him though. Thank god I still have his music and all of my videos of him. So watching him and listening to him has helped alot. I am listening to him now. But I still want Michael back so very badly.
 
Some ppl are just unbelievable why do the haters still have fun shouting stuff like that?
Don't they ever stop?

Whenever you wanna talk everyone is here for you.
I could talk about Michael alot with my mother but i get the feeling she is getting annoyed by it now
 
ivan_tasev said:
I don't know what happened!
I'm feeling so bad and it's becaming worse and worse.
It's all about Michael's passing.
I feel so empty now.
Part of me died!
He was the only thing in my life that I loved.
He was my idol, my God, my second father...
I was excited about the concerts so much...
I was telling everybody - He will show it to you.He is the best.He is going to make the greatest comeback ever!
Now I'm walking by the streets and some haters are looking at me so happy and they say - How is Michael doin?Not good ?He is dead!
God I felt so bad and my heart was broken again...
My soul is cold and I don't know what is going to happen.
I'm scared of thinking about the future.
My Michael is gone and the future is NO future to me!
Everything that happens is like a dream.
I can't realize that I'm not going to see another picture of him... I'm not going to see his smile again...
Little things make me agony...
When I heared that some band made a "unforgettable" concert I start crying...
It was 13th of July.
I had so many dreams about this day.
In that single moment... my heart, my soul, my whole world felt used... empty...
I can't beliеve that he is not the one who made"the unforgettable" concert!
I can't believe I saw a memorial service and not the greatest concert ever made!
I want him back so much and it's becaming painfull to me... I think I'm losing my mind
I'm not happy anymore... I have problems with my parents too.
They think that my love for Michael is some kind of madness and I can't take all of that...
Click to expand...

I know it doesnt seem like it right now, but things will get better I promise. It is all still too new for us all. I have lost a loved one before. An older sister, she was 40 is was 38 this was only 3 years ago. It will get easier, you will never get over the loss of Michael, after a while you will just learn to except it. I hope this will give you hope to carry on, you do have the strength you just don't know it yet. So please just get through each day one at a time. This is how you must deal with a loss like this, one day at a time.
 
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