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Michael's handwritten notes from Jackson - AEG trial motions

There's nothing wrong about dreaming big or huge. Don't mean to be rude Linda but your comment reminded me how people around Michael were mocking him when he said Thriller would be the biggest selling album and after BAD he realized he wouldn't surpass Thriller commercially because he didn't put that goal later on. All geniuses no matter its field set the bars too high, they have/had great minds and creativity for just putting little goals.
 
jaydom7 said:
I agree Linda! MJ was already a legend.. there was no need to put that much pressure on himself. I actually think he should've scaled down his tour without all the glitz and glamour, but that is who he was, so he wanted all the bells, whistles and explosions. He could've sat on a stool singing Human Nature and The Lady in my Life 'live' and I would've been happy.
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^^You see the underline. That is the problem right there. This is all about You, but what about Michael? Did he want to sit on a stool and just sing The Lady in my Life live and make one person happy. How about thinking about what Michael would be happy with. He always said he wanted to extend into other areas. Why is it that he is only doing the right thing and not stressing himself when ones limited wants are satisfied? Why should he scale down his tour without glitz and glamor^^? Again, this is what You want. However, none of that killed him.

What is being dismissed here is that in the construction of ideas and putting them on paper the creator is energized, happy, excited, feels a sense of worth, feels inspired and all this motivates him even more. That is why Randy talks about how excited Micheal was during meetings to discuss ideas. What some want to do is take all those feelings away from him, and have him engage in a strategy that is not motivating, and as a result would hinder his ability to create and get some joy out of it.

If Michael Jackson did not have big ideas and goals, there would be no Thriller album and no Lady in My Life live for him to sit and sing to Jaydom. What people need to understand is that The big goals/ideas came first. They were before the individual products, and they made the individual products possible. For instance, he first set a goal of being the biggest entertainer just like you see he writes down bigger than Fred, etc. After he made the goal/idea of being the biggest and best entertainer, he then worked on the components that will make that happen. Hence, work hard on the album & think Big results, so you have Thriller; work hard on a specific dance, movement and think Big results; work hard on the writing of songs & think Big results; and all these components went into making him the best entertainer.

So the big goal and idea always came first. It is because he wanted to become the big goal/idea, that he worked hard on the albums, etc. Notice too he always tags on a Big result, e.g., 1million. He taped the fingers, not because he wanted to be the best finger taper ever, but partly because all that would add to the image of the best entertainer--Michael Jackson. His clothes all added to the image of Michael the entertainer, and he continued this form of strategic planning throughout. Therefore, you cannot limit him, and no one was able to do that. What if someone said, "Michael stop this you will never become the best entertainer ever; you are just stressing yourself and it will lead to failure." Worse, what if he did listen.
 
It'd be impossible, even inconceivable wanting to tame a huge genius like Michael, his mind and imagination were lager than life. For instance, he looked up to Walt Disney, considered a genius in animation, visionary and savvy in business at his time.

"If you can dream it, you can do it." "All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." ~Walter Elias Disney

Michael had definitely LOTS of courage and unstoppable determination.
 
Thanks for the notes, Ivy :ciao:

Indeed, they show us how driven Michael was. He had so many plans and dreams. He knew how to succeed :angel:
Of course, note 8 and 9 are way too creepy :cry: I do understand from an own perspective that sleep and being pain free is the MOST important thing cause however can you create all these dreams.

Indeed, it's rude scolding Michael like a 5 year old telling him he went too far. :doh:
However, can you achieve all these dreams that we 'live on' if Michael didn't go all the way and beyond.
That's what creative peeps do!

I've been told to quit writing too cause I'm disabled and I should just act like a plant now :blink:
Why is that people always have to 'control' you and 'kill your joy' ?

Thanks Petrarose :D for your 'insightful' posts!

I know, I don't usuallly post here but the notes drew me here.

I understand what Michael drove to greatness. "Whatever you believe, you become" right :cheeky:
 
I seem to be missing something here - why wouldn't AEG want these as evidence?

They show that Michael was dictating to Murray.

They also show that Michael wants Phillips to hire a set of people for him.
 
Petrarose;3901198 said:
Lindavg I don't want to argue, but that first paragraph sounds so ^^ wrong, almost dismissive of his potential. It is almost as though you are trying to colonize his consciousness. It seems that Michael is supposed to go this high because that is most comfortable for you and these other people over there.

He set the bar of what he wants very very high so that his results are high. We spoke about this in threads before about how this is the way Michael works due to books he read about how the billionaires made it. People do not understand that Michael is who he is. He will not be satisfied with thinking small, thinking ordinary, thinking the average. Let him be who and what he wants to be, and let's not belittle his efforts & plans.
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I'm sure Linda didn't mean her post to come across as dismissive towards MJ's potential. Sometimes I think that MJ would had easier life if he had let/ allowed himself to be less demanding to himself.

Then again, I think MJ was born with the drive and he just couldn't stop and let himself be.
Michael was concentrating making himself immortal, from one of his notes
the next movies if I don't concentrate film no immortalization
and other one
"Who wants mortality? Everybody wants immortality. You want what you create to live! Be it sculpting, painting, music, composition. That is why to escape death I attempt to bind my soul to my work because I just want it to live forever and just give all that I have."
Michael Jackson

Your last paragraph reminded me of one article that I read few years ago, and it perfectly discribes as what kind of companion Michael is in:
The human race has quite often owed its scientific or artistic progress to the “weird” and the “eccentric.” Let us consider, for example, Galileo Galilei, who was charged for openly discussing Copernican theory, a concept seen as sinful and roundly condemned at that time; later, of course, this theory went on to become the accepted standard of scientific understanding of the universe. We might also stop to consider how treasonable the very idea of democracy once was, how dangerous the aristocracy felt it to be; later, democracy became the world’s prevailing political philosophy. We can also remember that the concept of equality between : women and men, among different ethnicities, or diverse religions, was derided when it first emerged. Had she not thought differently from others, might Mother Teresa not have been a stay-at-home mom instead of traveling to the slums of India and risking her life for humanity?

Keeping the history of these exceptional ideas and people in mind, I can almost guarantee that if one had killed all the “freaks” among our Australopithecine ancestors 3.5 million years ago, our species might not have made it to the 21st century. We might very well have remained a much more primitive species, one without the use of fire and the wheel, let alone an orchestra, or democracy, or computers. Is it not, after all, diversity that allows for evolution?

http://foreverlandis.hubpages.com/hub/Does-American-Dream-Have-to-Die-With-Michael-Jackson
 
ivy said:
Note 9
Conrad must practice now I can't be tired after procedure to important Rim sleep
for plane also with bed
Hire Conrad exclusive
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This is bad:( If this is what I think it is, then MJ was aware of CM wasn't experienced and allowed CM to "practice" on himself.
There are some notes that can work against AEG, but this note definately works for AEG.


ivy said:
Note 10
Cirque Du Soleil 10,000,000
AEG 250,000,000
Nike Deal
Blue City
al NOOR
prince FADIA
Hire accountant I trust now and lawyer I want to meet him
Click to expand...
 
even though mj was aware that he needed to be cautious, did he know aeg would screw him as well???

judging by these notes posted it seems as mj thought he was gonna get big loads of money from his deal with aeg and all other projects he was hoping to do (with them). little did he know aeg was gonna screw him out of any profit. the productions costs were already going higher what was determined and aeg has admitted on stand that mj was not gonna make those numbers they first presented to him.

look he writes "weekly income $20 million/week" and he has written "Aeg 250,000"


oh boy was he fooled.

im sorry for you michael... you described it best; the entertainment industry is full of sharks, charlatans and impostors.
 
I could be very wrong here but when Michael said he wanted Murray to practise he may not have meant it like -until he gets it right - I understood it more like he wanted him there to start practising medicine.
God bless Michael, he never stopped thinking ahead and being innovative. What we might have witnessed had he lived.
 
morinen said:
And I remember someone was bitching that MJ never wanted a Cirque du Soleil show...
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and many fans and family members said that MJ didn't hire Dileo or Branca :scratch:

If we take that these notes and few others that were shown earlier are written by MJ, then he must have hired Branca and Dileo:)
 
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It's sad Michael's notes are not even kept private ....so sorry for him
Note 3 breaks my heart but shows us how much he loved his mum
 
LastTear said:
I seem to be missing something here - why wouldn't AEG want these as evidence?

They show that Michael was dictating to Murray.

They also show that Michael wants Phillips to hire a set of people for him.
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No they want to stop the plaintiffs from using them for the concluding arguments because they feel they are hearsay. I think the real reason is because some of them show he had some money deals planned. This goes against AeG's expert who claimed Michael would not make much in the future or to figure out future earnings is speculative.

However some of the notes are good for AEG like the ones about Muarry to practice, Randy is conflict, and hire Muarry. I am still trying to figure out that need rem sleep note, because here he is claiming rem sleep is necessary. He shows he knows it is vital, so why have Muarry practice? This is what I do not get. Did he intend to use something else to sleep that would give rem sleep? Questions, questions, questions....

We also have no dates on these notes, which would be great. I would like to know when the Muarry notes were made, and how close they were to Michael contractual agreement with AEG. Did he write the note about Muarry before he signed with AEG or After.

Bubs I get you; I understand, but notice you wrote that sometimes I think he... That is what I am saying. It is I think/feel, you think/feel, they think/feel, ect., but that is not what Michael thinks/feels. It will never happen, and he died not changing it.

I like the quote you posted: That is why to escape death I attempt to bind my soul to my work because I just want it to live forever and just give all that I have."
Michael Jackson. Look at the underlined part. That tells you right there he is going to do this 100%. No halfway plans, no thinking little, no stopping & give up, no saying I had enough. He is going all the way and giving ALL that he has. This is big thinking there.

Treasure I agree. Nothing from his death or life is private, if it can be used to make money. After Michael died we say the trucks that came to take away his belongings, and we saw some of the family and Latoya's boyfriend. No one mentioned they saw a 3T going there. Yet we see he had a lot of documents in his possession which came from Michael's house. Why did he take this man's notes and keep for himself? I don't believe that silly story about guarding them for his children. Just give the kids the notes and let them put it in their treasure box. Also the kids have an estate. Then, he claimed he did not know about the case, and he is the children's guardian. We are to believe that it was during the trial that he found out about the lawsuit and then gave these notes to the plaintiffs to use for the case.
 
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I wish Michael could see the Cirque shows. I always thought he would have loved them and now we see he wanted to do something with them. You know what amazes me? That despite everything that happened to Michael he stayed true to himself to the very end. He always thought big and maybe he did put a lot of pressure on himself but that's who he was. He just needed the proper rest and the right support system to get it done. I also think that after everything that happened to him he probably felt he had something to prove even more to everybody and himself. I like these notes too because it shows that Michael had a mind of his own and he knew what he wanted to do. He wasn't a baby that needed to be told what to do. He had goals and dreams and looking forward to the future.
 
Michael always said he was looking forward to the future, he was very focused on the future, he didn't live in the past.
 
marebear said:
I wish Michael could see the Cirque shows. I always thought he would have loved them and now we see he wanted to do something with them. You know what amazes me? That despite everything that happened to Michael he stayed true to himself to the very end. He always thought big and maybe he did put a lot of pressure on himself but that's who he was. He just needed the proper rest and the right support system to get it done. I also think that after everything that happened to him he probably felt he had something to prove even more to everybody and himself. I like these notes too because it shows that Michael had a mind of his own and he knew what he wanted to do. He wasn't a baby that needed to be told what to do. He had goals and dreams and looking forward to the future.
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I feel so too. Most of the notes show he had taken stock of his whole situation with people and past experiences and he was going to get back his team &move forward. In fact those notes really gave me a sense of peace, that he left us motivated and with plans for the future. It is like going to bed at night with the idea tomorrow you have to go to work, and you go to sleep and never make it. So I see his situation as something that will happen to a lot of people.

Thrill about AEG was going to screw Michael, we don't know when the notes were written. We don't know exactly what the money amount was for. Michel would know in the contract how much he would basically get per week. We don't know if the amount involves money from different sources related to the AEG tour. Further, knowing Michael, he could have made a range that he would get from 150,000 to 250,000 per week , but he would think & write the 250,000. These deals usually involve comments like "you could make about."

That is why it is not a good idea for the plaintiffs to look at Michael's scribbles on a piece of paper and use it as 100% proof of anything. We don't know which scribbles were only ideas, and would not happen until 2014. I was wondering if the plaintiffs expert used the notes to make his calculations for future earnings?
 
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AEG has said on the stand that they were fooling MJ and saying 'big numbers' knowing good and well he wouldn't make it. They are liars and sharks. Their intention was to make money but for MJ not to make any.
 
^^Of course they will say that. They are in a court being sued for billions!!! They will say he would make little, little money. Both sides lie to help their case. The plaintiffs lie/inflate what Michael would make. The defense lie/deflate what Michel would make in the future. It is all a courtroom game although a sick one. How do you mean they knew he would not make it. You mean they went in partnership with him and knew he would not make it?

Anyone trying to figure out the rem thing vs propofol?
 
Petrarose said:
^^Of course they will say that. They are in a court being sued for billions!!! They will say he would make little, little money. Both sides lie to help their case. The plaintiffs lie/inflate what Michael would make. The defense lie/deflate what Michel would make in the future. It is all a courtroom game although a sick one. How do you mean they knew he would not make it. You mean they went in partnership with him and knew he would not make it?

Anyone trying to figure out the rem thing vs propofol?
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Not sure but I think Murray was probably giving him small amounts, Michael thought he needed to sleep for much longer for REM sleep. :(
 
LastTear said:
Not sure but I think Murray was probably giving him small amounts, Michael thought he needed to sleep for much longer for REM sleep. :(
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So you think a small amount of prof would give you rem sleep. Didn't the expert say prof does not give you rem sleep? If he gives him a small amount, when it wears off, Michael would wake up, so how will small amounts make him sleep longer? I also think that with an anesthetic, a specific amount put the patient to sleep. So if .05 puts Michael to sleep, reducing it to .10 will not put him to sleep. You know in 09 Soundmind had a theory that Muarry was giving an initial drip to put him under, then give Michael those crazy benzos to continue the sleep. Could it be that this is really what happened, and that it was the benzos that caused all those off effects that Kenny and others saw. I must ask soundmind what she thinks now in light of this rem sleep scribble. I just can't get this thing out of my mind, because Michael knows that prof does not give rem sleep. He was told so by the doctors. Therefore, there must be a plan for this rem sleep.
 
I think it was the multiple benzos that was giving MJ those symptons. Like I stated Murray had no clue what he was doing and he was treating MJ like an experiment
 
Petrarose said:
So you think a small amount of prof would give you rem sleep. Didn't the expert say prof does not give you rem sleep? If he gives him a small amount, when it wears off, Michael would wake up, so how will small amounts make him sleep longer? I also think that with an anesthetic, a specific amount put the patient to sleep. So if .05 puts Michael to sleep, reducing it to .10 will not put him to sleep. You know in 09 Soundmind had a theory that Muarry was giving an initial drip to put him under, then give Michael those crazy benzos to continue the sleep. Could it be that this is really what happened, and that it was the benzos that caused all those off effects that Kenny and others saw. I must ask soundmind what she thinks now in light of this rem sleep scribble. I just can't get this thing out of my mind, because Michael knows that prof does not give rem sleep. He was told so by the doctors. Therefore, there must be a plan for this rem sleep.
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No I meant the opposite. I think in Michael's head he needed to sleep longer to get REM, Michael seemed to think he could get REM sleep under propofol. So I am wondering if in fact Murray was using small amounts as he said, but when Michael kept waking then put him in a drip and the rest is history. :(

Note 9

Conrad must practice now I can't be tired after procedure to important Rim sleep
for plane also with bed
Hire Conrad exclusive
Click to expand...

'I can't be tired after procedure' - after Murray has treated him?

It could just be that Michael didn't believe the others who said he would not get REM and that he felt rested after a long 'sleep' on propofol.
 
ivy said:
Here are the pictures of the note


Note 10

Cirque Du Soleil 10,000,000
AEG 250,000,000
Nike Deal
Blue City
al NOOR
prince FADIA
Hire accountant I trust now and lawyer I want to meet him
Click to expand...
 
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LastTear said:
'I can't be tired after procedure' - after Murray has treated him?
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I read it as after Murray treated him. I read that note like Michael saying "I can't be tired , it's too important, I need to get a good sleep and Murray needs to practice to achieve this."

But the specifics I don't know. Was Murray giving him benzos and he woke up tired? Did Michael thought if he got Propofol from a drip he would get REM sleep and/or wake up rested? I don't know.

and that's the hearsay or speculative part of these notes. Can we tell exactly what he meant?
 
ivy said:
I read it as after Murray treated him. I read that note like Michael saying "I can't be tired , it's too important, I need to get a good sleep and Murray needs to practice to achieve this."

But the specifics I don't know. Was Murray giving him benzos and he woke up tired? Did Michael thought if he got Propofol from a drip he would get REM sleep and/or wake up rested? I don't know.

and that's the hearsay or speculative part of these notes. Can we tell exactly what he meant?
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No of course we can't. They are of course very open to interpretation. It just reminded me of Murray stating how he was giving MJ very small amounts (propofol) and of course we had the testimony from experts that with those small amounts Michael would keep waking up. Murray needs to practice might indicate that Murray was nervous about propofol and was tentatively administering it to Michael.

I honestly don't know and perhaps it doesn't matter, it's not going to change the outcome unfortunately.
 
Murray should not have been administering it period. I don't care how small the amounts were.. he was mixing all kinds of meds. Had no clue what he was doing
 
Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.
Harriet Tubman
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Aim for the sky and you'll reach the ceiling. Aim for the ceiling and you'll stay on the floor Bill Shankly
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Aim for the stars and you reach the treetops. Aim for the treetops and you stay on the ground
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I´m glad that Michael still had dreams for his future. He kept himself busy with good things instead of thinking all the time about bad things that happened to him.
 
I really would have loved to see what MJ had in store for us all.

I've got to wonder why he didn't think his legacy was already cemented, but then again I have to remember he was the epitome of a perfectionist. I think movies became one of his dream aspiration even more after he stopped releasing music.
 
ivy said:
I read it as after Murray treated him. I read that note like Michael saying "I can't be tired , it's too important, I need to get a good sleep and Murray needs to practice to achieve this."

But the specifics I don't know. Was Murray giving him benzos and he woke up tired? Did Michael thought if he got Propofol from a drip he would get REM sleep and/or wake up rested? I don't know.

and that's the hearsay or speculative part of these notes. Can we tell exactly what he meant?
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Yeah that's the way I read it too, and yes these notes are speculative. You can't really tell with some what exactly he meant. For instance, we don't even know if he wrote some of them after a particular heated discussion with someone, and then went and scribble down some quick notes. Later, he might rethink and write a different note. Oh dear. Anyway it still just have me thinking. He believed the docs when they said prof was safe if monitored, so he will believe them if they say it is not rem.

How were you going to get rem Michael?

This trial is so maddening!! I swear I have come out of it with more questions than I had before. I wish it never took place!!!

Lasttear don't forget that Muarry was saying small amounts to stress that he gave Michel a Little, so if Michel had more it was Michael who had taken the extra amounts. Remember Muarry went hiding and came back with a story and gave that cocktail outline. He also claimed he was weaning him off, but the experts said he did not have to give him less or skip days, all he had to do was NOT give Micheal the drug and that would be it. You don't wean him off in the way you wean those babies born addicted to drugs. Of course, Muarry does not know that so he said the wrong thing. We really don't know if there is any truth in what this man said.

Keep remembering: There was nothing I gave him that would harm him.
 
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