Janet Jackson on Dateline - Sunday, Feb.13th

[Roosje]

Why was my post deleted? I didn't say anything about doctor shopping or other nasty rumours whatsoever.

 

[yaazgurl]

So far the coverage I've seen of this interview has focused on Joe.

 

[AngieJ]

On a personal note, I am tired of people assuming that once you are defending Michael you are doing so because you think he was perfect and he could do no wrong. Yes, some fans need Michael to be perfect for their own peculiar reasons. But most of us recognise Michael as a extraordinary HUMAN BEING. He was a HUMAN BEING who was unfairly and consistently maligned for over 20 years. All fans want is for him to be treated fairly and with dignity.

I find those that criticize us to be hilariously hypocritical. If this was their star, they would want the exact same thing as us. I find it crazy that a Janet fan wouldn't get where we're coming from on this.

 

[chanel05]

While some may not agree with lifeismagical (myself included) let us disagree in a constructive and respectful way.

On a personal note, I am tired of people assuming that once you are defending Michael you are doing so because you think he was perfect and he could do no wrong. Yes, some fans need Michael to be perfect for their own peculiar reasons. But most of us recognise Michael as a extraordinary HUMAN BEING. He was a HUMAN BEING who was unfairly and consistently maligned for over 20 years. All fans want is for him to be treated fairly and with dignity.

If the wonderfulness (I know it is not a word) was highlighted and discussed as much as the 'negative' side I, for one, would not be as passionate as I am. Instead, what we get is one story after another that blames Michael for everything. He was not perfect but he was also not the unrelenting villain either. What we are seeking is balance! Plain and simple.

I know it may come off that I say that but I don't think that all fans think he was perfect... But a few come off that way. We all(or at least I hope) want him to be treated fairly. Its just that it seems as if people bash people based off to little or no fact. I agree that we all should disagree in a civil way, but it seems as if you have a different opinion from the norm on here, you get called names and bashed. That's not fair. I never came here and bashed or disrespected anyone but people didn't like my opinion or views or Things and bashed me for it.

I find those that criticize us to be hilariously hypocritical. If this was their star, they would want the exact same thing as us. I find it crazy that a Janet fan wouldn't get where we're coming from on this.

We like MJ also. MJ is and always will be my #1. But a lot of the things like this article gets blown out of proportion and it turns into a bash fest. If you don't like her and hate her( or the family in general) it's fine... But why ruin it for everyone else who may want to hear about what they are doing?? Why do people claim they hate him post 90% of their post about them?? It's okay if you don't like them and state what you dislike but why does EVERY THREAD turn into bashing and the same repetitive stuff???

 

[xthunderx2]

We like MJ also. MJ is and always will be my #1. But a lot of the things like this article gets blown out of proportion and it turns into a bash fest. If you don't like her and hate her( or the family in general) it's fine... But why ruin it for everyone else who may want to hear about what they are doing?? Why do people claim they hate him post 90% of their post about them?? It's okay if you don't like them and state what you dislike but why does EVERY THREAD turn into bashing and the same repetitive stuff???

For me personally....there was a couple of the Jackson's that I didn't like..for obvious reasons that we all know about....however...Janet was NEVER one of those Jacksons. I dont HATE any of them......I dont LIKE the way they have been throwing Michael under the bus since June 25th. And YES I get very offended when people talk badly about him...I get offended even here.....and like I said earlier....I shouldn't have to get offended on an MJ fan board. I know Michael wasn't perfect..I know he was human and made human errors....BUT....for US to sit back and name his faults is just wrong....he got enough of that from everyone else when he was alive. WE HIS FANS.....need not join the crowd......Michael will always be perfect in my eyes......it is to late...he is already in my heart...and I have already excepted him for who he was. There should not be one negative word coming out of the mouth of not one fan on this board about Michael...we should be saying all the good that he did...sitting here picking him apart like some do...really is unnecessary and all it does is cause conflict....so as long as some are criticizing anything at all about Michael...there will ALWAYS be those of us that will come to his defense....each and every time. So if we get that offended when.members of his family have the nerve to say anything negative. Especially when they have never shown any proof of what it is they say has transpired in the past..(.interventions).....and when they try to use his name to gain money for there own pockets.

 

[chanel05]

For me personally....there was a couple of the Jackson's that I didn't like..for obvious reasons that we all know about....however...Janet was NEVER one of those Jacksons. I dont HATE any of them......I dont LIKE the way they have been throwing Michael under the bus since June 25th. And YES I get very offended when people talk badly about him...I get offended even here.....and like I said earlier....I shouldn't have to get offended on an MJ fan board. I know Michael wasn't perfect..I know he was human and made human errors....BUT....for US to sit back and name his faults is just wrong....he got enough of that from everyone else when he was alive. WE HIS FANS.....need not join the crowd......Michael will always be perfect in my eyes......it is to late...he is already in my heart...and I have already excepted him for who he was. There should not be one negative word coming out of the mouth of not one fan on this board about Michael...we should be saying all the good that he did...sitting here picking him apart like some do...really is unnecessary and all it does is cause conflict....so as long as some are criticizing anything at all about Michael...there will ALWAYS be those of us that will come to his defense....each and every time. So if we get that offended when.members of his family have the nerve to say anything negative. Especially when they have never shown any proof of what it is they say has transpired in the past..(.interventions).....and when they try to use his name to gain money for there own pockets.

It's fine that you and others feel the way you feel... But there really arent many people who bad mouth MJ or pick him apart on here... The main thing people on here get into it about is their view on the family. I see where you are coming from though... It's okay to feel that they are wrong for what they say but they don't have to be bashed in every thread

 

[TheChosenOne]

I agree with you chanel05. We cannot let our anger and disappointment spill over into every discussion we have this section or elsewhere. But, I think it would be great if some people did not defend the family at Michael's expense!

Let's shake hands and call a truce!

 

[chanel05]

I agree with you chanel05. We cannot let our anger and disappointment spill over into every discussion we have this section or elsewhere. But, I think it would be great if some people did not defend the family at Michael's expense!

Let's shake hands and call a truce!

That's true... We just have to make sure we don't attack each other for our opinions and have civil dicussions. On here I'm considered a "family supporter" or whatever but I don't mind when people voice their opinions about someone... I just Nate it when people spew hate.... I DON'T CARE WHO IT'S DIRECTED AT!!!! That's just me. I will say that most posters on here don't spew hate. TRUCE!!!!!

 

[marebear]

His family is hard to understand. Sometimes they do something and you feel like they are standing up for Michael and other times you wonder what the heck are they doing? The one thing that the family has been consistent on is the last time they saw Michael they told him they loved him and vice versa. The others have mentioned that as well. That was good because they had no idea what was to come a short time later.

 

[AngieJ]

We like MJ also. MJ is and always will be my #1. But a lot of the things like this article gets blown out of proportion and it turns into a bash fest. If you don't like her and hate her( or the family in general) it's fine... But why ruin it for everyone else who may want to hear about what they are doing?? Why do people claim they hate him post 90% of their post about them?? It's okay if you don't like them and state what you dislike but why does EVERY THREAD turn into bashing and the same repetitive stuff???

Oh, believe me, I totally get where you're coming from with the repetitive hate stuff. Some fans do over do it and don't know how to tone it down.

 

[riviera1992]

Because i trully want to became an enlightened and true MJ fan can you please tell how this interview by Janet Jackson can help me became one because i don't quite understand it.Maybe i am stupid or something

No you're not stupid. If someone is brought up in a somewhat functional family, it's pretty much impossible to understand the dysfunction.

I, on the other hand, was brought up in the same type of dysfunctional family. Being the same age as Michael, I guess in those days it wasn't criminal to beat your kids with a leather belt, daily or weekly or monthly. It doesn't really matter how many times. For the kid getting the beatings from his father it's always extremely traumatic and is always remembered as a regular occurence. And the abuse verbal and/or physical is passed on among sibblings. It becomes a way of life. And it doesn't matter who's getting the most or less beatings in the family because the whole time you or your siblings is being chased around and beaten by the father, the child screams bloody murder and cry and hurled of pain while the rest of the family is hiding and shaking and crying because they don't know who will be next. The trauma is just as severe. My mother to this day says the beatings were few and far between and I remember it to be every other day.

All children of violent parents have low self-esteem and hate their looks. They are plagued at a young age by the curse of perfectionism. The child sub-conscious mind hears that little voice that says "Maybe if I'm perfect, he won't beat me anymore and will love me." From then on, you spend your life questioning everything about yourself and looking for approval in the wrong places because your sub-conciousmind will gravitate you to which is familiar to it's programming from childhood.

I've learned all this during my years of therapy and one can only grow and move on toward better functionality after working through 12 steps programs on co-dependency.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Sorry for the long post. Hope it helps.

 

[chanel05]

No you're not stupid. If someone is brought up in a somewhat functional family, it's pretty much impossible to understand the dysfunction.

I, on the other hand, was brought up in the same type of dysfunctional family. Being the same age as Michael, I guess in those days it wasn't criminal to beat your kids with a leather belt, daily or weekly or monthly. It doesn't really matter how many times. For the kid getting the beatings from his father it's always extremely traumatic and is always remembered as a regular occurence. And the abuse verbal and/or physical is passed on among sibblings. It becomes a way of life. And it doesn't matter who's getting the most or less beatings in the family because the whole time you or your siblings is being chased around and beaten by the father, the child screams bloody murder and cry and hurled of pain while the rest of the family is hiding and shaking and crying because they don't know who will be next. The trauma is just as severe. My mother to this day says the beatings were few and far between and I remember it to be every other day.

All children of violent parents have low self-esteem and hate their looks. They are plagued at a young age by the curse of perfectionism. The child sub-conscious mind hears that little voice that says "Maybe if I'm perfect, he won't beat me anymore and will love me." From then on, you spend your life questioning everything about yourself and looking for approval in the wrong places because your sub-conciousmind will gravitate you to which is familiar to it's programming from childhood.

I've learned all this during my years of therapy and one can only grow and move on toward better functionality after working through 12 steps programs on co-dependency.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Sorry for the long post. Hope it helps.

I agree that they need family therapy.. I think they need to talk about the stuff instead of acting like it never happened(Latoya said that's what they do in an interview)

 

[xthunderx2]

No you're not stupid. If someone is brought up in a somewhat functional family, it's pretty much impossible to understand the dysfunction.

I, on the other hand, was brought up in the same type of dysfunctional family. Being the same age as Michael, I guess in those days it wasn't criminal to beat your kids with a leather belt, daily or weekly or monthly. It doesn't really matter how many times. For the kid getting the beatings from his father it's always extremely traumatic and is always remembered as a regular occurence. And the abuse verbal and/or physical is passed on among sibblings. It becomes a way of life. And it doesn't matter who's getting the most or less beatings in the family because the whole time you or your siblings is being chased around and beaten by the father, the child screams bloody murder and cry and hurled of pain while the rest of the family is hiding and shaking and crying because they don't know who will be next. The trauma is just as severe. My mother to this day says the beatings were few and far between and I remember it to be every other day.

All children of violent parents have low self-esteem and hate their looks. They are plagued at a young age by the curse of perfectionism. The child sub-conscious mind hears that little voice that says "Maybe if I'm perfect, he won't beat me anymore and will love me." From then on, you spend your life questioning everything about yourself and looking for approval in the wrong places because your sub-conciousmind will gravitate you to which is familiar to it's programming from childhood.

I've learned all this during my years of therapy and one can only grow and move on toward better functionality after working through 12 steps programs on co-dependency.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Sorry for the long post. Hope it helps.

Excellent Post!!!...and each and every word of it is true.....and I totally agree with you...IMO..they really DO need therapy...I dont say that to hate on them at all....I think that if they DID go to therapy....they may just heal. .....all it can do is make their lives better...and maybe they would understand a little better WHY it is they are doing what it is they are doing to Michael's memory...and thats all I am saying on this subject. ...thank you for this post.....I am sure alot of us can relate.

 

[chanel05]

Excellent Post!!!...and each and every word of it is true.....and I totally agree with you...IMO..they really DO need therapy...I dont say that to hate on them at all....I think that if they DID go to therapy....they may just heal. .....all it can do is make their lives better...and maybe they would understand a little better WHY it is they are doing what it is they are doing to Michael's memory...and thats all I am saying on this subject. ...thank you for this post.....I am sure alot of us can relate.

I interpeted it a little differently... I think they all need family counseling(if MJ was still here, he included). I'm not saying therapy because they are crazy, but therapy to resolve family issues with one another. I think most of it stems from their childhoods. They all need to sit down and have a true heart to heart to work out their problems. (not throwing anyone under the bus here.. But I'm just stating my opinion) it's sad when you hear mike and Janet talk about their childhoods... It just goes to show that money, wealth and fame doesn't equal happiness. I also hope that whatever peace that MJ didn't find here in life, he finds in heaven.

 

[ginvid]

No you're not stupid. If someone is brought up in a somewhat functional family, it's pretty much impossible to understand the dysfunction.

I, on the other hand, was brought up in the same type of dysfunctional family. Being the same age as Michael, I guess in those days it wasn't criminal to beat your kids with a leather belt, daily or weekly or monthly. It doesn't really matter how many times. For the kid getting the beatings from his father it's always extremely traumatic and is always remembered as a regular occurence. And the abuse verbal and/or physical is passed on among sibblings. It becomes a way of life. And it doesn't matter who's getting the most or less beatings in the family because the whole time you or your siblings is being chased around and beaten by the father, the child screams bloody murder and cry and hurled of pain while the rest of the family is hiding and shaking and crying because they don't know who will be next. The trauma is just as severe. My mother to this day says the beatings were few and far between and I remember it to be every other day.

All children of violent parents have low self-esteem and hate their looks. They are plagued at a young age by the curse of perfectionism. The child sub-conscious mind hears that little voice that says "Maybe if I'm perfect, he won't beat me anymore and will love me." From then on, you spend your life questioning everything about yourself and looking for approval in the wrong places because your sub-conciousmind will gravitate you to which is familiar to it's programming from childhood.

I've learned all this during my years of therapy and one can only grow and move on toward better functionality after working through 12 steps programs on co-dependency.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Sorry for the long post. Hope it helps.

Sorry riviera, I think this is a case of how you view things. We were just talking the other day about being spanked with my Mom's leather belts. How when we were hit, it would leave welt marks on our arms/legs/behind that even had the hole indentations of where the buckle goes in the belt. I used to get a spanking all of the time. I remember running too much in the house and having to run in place and being hit with the belt anytime I stopped. (I guarantee I didn't run around like that anymore). I don't think my parents were violent or dysfunctional and I do not think of it in a violent way as do many children who were spanked as well. I don't think that of itself causes low self esteem or make you hate your looks. I don't think for manythat they wish they were more perfect so they would not be spanked anymore. I think for many it was just a way off life. We laugh about it now.

But I do think that it does effect some people more acutely than others.

And, I do think it obviously did effect the members of this family, even though not to the same degree. And I will agree with you that they do seem to have some deep seated issues that would be good for them to professionally work through. But I think that more so comes from their verbal/emotional abuse as opposed to being disciplined by Joe. I think that has had a more lasting detriment to them. They were psychologically abused. And that kind of stuff like never goes away.

 

[xthunderx2]

Sorry riviera, I think this is a case of how you view things. We were just talking the other day about being spanked with my Mom's leather belts. How when we were hit, it would leave welt marks on our arms/legs/behind that even had the hole indentations of where the buckle goes in the belt. I used to get a spanking all of the time. I remember running too much in the house and having to run in place and being hit with the belt anytime I stopped. (I guarantee I didn't run around like that anymore). I don't think my parents were violent or dysfunctional and I do not think of it in a violent way as do many children who were spanked as well. I don't think that of itself causes low self esteem or make you hate your looks. I don't think for manythat they wish they were more perfect so they would not be spanked anymore. I think for many it was just a way off life. We laugh about it now.

But I do think that it does effect some people more acutely than others.

And, I do think it obviously did effect the members of this family, even though not to the same degree. And I will agree with you that they do seem to have some deep seated issues that would be good for them to professionally work through. But I think that more so comes from their verbal/emotional abuse as opposed to being disciplined by Joe. I think that has had a more lasting detriment to them. They were psychologically abused. And that kind of stuff like never goes away.

I agree..when your parent goes around telling you that you are ugly.....that right there sticks with a kid psychologically....and of course it would cause them long term mental health issues. Which is why I agree...counceling can only benefit them. Oh My I wouldn't want to be that counselor.....especially as far as Joe is concerned.....he would find out that he ha ALOT of apologizing to do to his family.

 

[Alayasha]

No you're not stupid. If someone is brought up in a somewhat functional family, it's pretty much impossible to understand the dysfunction.

I, on the other hand, was brought up in the same type of dysfunctional family. Being the same age as Michael, I guess in those days it wasn't criminal to beat your kids with a leather belt, daily or weekly or monthly. It doesn't really matter how many times. For the kid getting the beatings from his father it's always extremely traumatic and is always remembered as a regular occurence. And the abuse verbal and/or physical is passed on among sibblings. It becomes a way of life. And it doesn't matter who's getting the most or less beatings in the family because the whole time you or your siblings is being chased around and beaten by the father, the child screams bloody murder and cry and hurled of pain while the rest of the family is hiding and shaking and crying because they don't know who will be next. The trauma is just as severe. My mother to this day says the beatings were few and far between and I remember it to be every other day.

All children of violent parents have low self-esteem and hate their looks. They are plagued at a young age by the curse of perfectionism. The child sub-conscious mind hears that little voice that says "Maybe if I'm perfect, he won't beat me anymore and will love me." From then on, you spend your life questioning everything about yourself and looking for approval in the wrong places because your sub-conciousmind will gravitate you to which is familiar to it's programming from childhood.

I've learned all this during my years of therapy and one can only grow and move on toward better functionality after working through 12 steps programs on co-dependency.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Sorry for the long post. Hope it helps.

This is a very interesting post, thanks for sharing. In my previous posts (I apologize for the errors, I'm on my cellphone) I tried to show that the emotional and psychological scars Michael, LaToya and Janet talk about goes far deeper than the teasing Janet has discussed. In a way, focusing on the teasing is a way to avoid facing the truly painful experience that caused her problem. I'm trying to be as objective and non-judgemental as possible so I will just say that she should explore her relationship with both of her parents. Like you, I wonder why some of the family members have chosen to be public about certain things. Yes they have the right to go public. However, once you open that door willingly, it's nearly impossible to close it.

Also, I've had a discussion with MANY people over beatings/whippings/spankings. And like Ginvid mentioned, many people were spanked growing up and not only are they fine as adults, they later thank their parents for it. What people forget about Joe's spanking is that some of it, I'm not sure of the percentage, had absolutely nothing to do with discipline his children due to bad behavior. Joe allegedly beat and verbally abused his children, preparing them for a showbusiness career. Similar to trainers beating circus animals while teaching them tricks to perform. In a civilized society, we don't accept animals being mistreated like this. We have laws against this and I'm sorry, there is no justification for a grown man verbally attacking, physically throwing his children against a wall and denying them an emotional bond all because they missed a dance step. Is there any wonder why his children would be afraid of him? Add to that the story of Joe and Leonard Rowe at MJ's house weeks before he was killed and Joe is banging on the door, screaming that his problems were MJ's fault and refusing to leave until MJ signed that contract. Now this isn't little J5 Michael, this is 50 year old Michael, father of 3 in his own home yet his father does this? How many of us would have loved to meet Michael and spend time with him yet you have Michael saying he wanted to get to know and spend time with his dad, whom he was made to call Joseph. I don't want to get too far off into this topic because I readily admit that I wasn't there and I don't know what goes on behind closed doors. I will say that MJ said that he made peace with his father. I believe him and I hope he has the peace and acceptance he truly deserved on Earth and I hope that his siblings who struggled with this are able to make peace with their father as well.

 

[ginvid]

This is a very interesting post, thanks for sharing. In my previous posts (I apologize for the errors, I'm on my cellphone) I tried to show that the emotional and psychological scars Michael, LaToya and Janet talk about goes far deeper than the teasing Janet has discussed. In a way, focusing on the teasing is a way to avoid facing the truly painful experience that caused her problem. I'm trying to be as objective and non-judgemental as possible so I will just say that she should explore her relationship with both of her parents. Like you, I wonder why some of the family members have chosen to be public about certain things. Yes they have the right to go public. However, once you open that door willingly, it's nearly impossible to close it.

Also, I've had a discussion with MANY people over beatings/whippings/spankings. And like Ginvid mentioned, many people were spanked growing up and not only are they fine as adults, they later thank their parents for it. What people forget about Joe's spanking is that some of it, I'm not sure of the percentage, had absolutely nothing to do with discipline his children due to bad behavior. Joe allegedly beat and verbally abused his children, preparing them for a showbusiness career. Similar to trainers beating circus animals while teaching them tricks to perform. In a civilized society, we don't accept animals being mistreated like this. We have laws against this and I'm sorry, there is no justification for a grown man verbally attacking, physically throwing his children against a wall and denying them an emotional bond all because they missed a dance step. Is there any wonder why his children would be afraid of him? Add to that the story of Joe and Leonard Rowe at MJ's house weeks before he was killed and Joe is banging on the door, screaming that his problems were MJ's fault and refusing to leave until MJ signed that contract. Now this isn't little J5 Michael, this is 50 year old Michael, father of 3 in his own home yet his father does this? How many of us would have loved to meet Michael and spend time with him yet you have Michael saying he wanted to get to know and spend time with his dad, whom he was made to call Joseph. I don't want to get too far off into this topic because I readily admit that I wasn't there and I don't know what goes on behind closed doors. I will say that MJ said that he made peace with his father. I believe him and I hope he has the peace and acceptance he truly deserved on Earth and I hope that his siblings who struggled with this are able to make peace with their father as well.

I agree with that. I remember Oprah said when she interviewed Michael and about his father, their was genuine fear in him. Like you said, MJ was able to address his issues with his father (even though it seems his father did not address his own issues) and hopefully came to some kind of closure.

With Janet and the rest of the family, if they too have some of those same feelings as MJ, they will never find the root cause of their distress in life until they face them. I will say though that just the damage from being teased by siblings can be very detrimental and have long lasting effects as well. I can say that whatever Janet, or anyone has to work through, i think it is good for them to do so. But I think it would be better if there are deeper issues, to not use MJ as the scapegoat to represent every ill in her life.

 

[Moulin Rouge]

But I think it would be better if there are deeper issues, to not use MJ as the scapegoat to represent every ill in her life.

how did she use Michael as a scapegoat. Michael was one of the most famous people every so when janet says my brothers teased me it includes him and of course the media will specifically say Michael when mentioning her brothers. Michael and janet were very close growing up and till the day he passed he still saw her as "dunk". I think i remember Katherine wrote in her book that Janet did not like the nickname at first but eventually she grew to deal with it and took it as an affectionate nickname. Michael often gave nicknames to people like doodoohead, applehead ans etc. Janet made it clear she knew he didn't mean to harm her so how is she blaming him? This book is about Janet's story and every story has a beginning. Janet has to speak about her childhood to reflect on how she felt the way she did, her mentioning the teasing affected her doesn't mean she holds anything against him now.

 

[gerryevans]

No you're not stupid. If someone is brought up in a somewhat functional family, it's pretty much impossible to understand the dysfunction.

I, on the other hand, was brought up in the same type of dysfunctional family. Being the same age as Michael, I guess in those days it wasn't criminal to beat your kids with a leather belt, daily or weekly or monthly. It doesn't really matter how many times. For the kid getting the beatings from his father it's always extremely traumatic and is always remembered as a regular occurence. And the abuse verbal and/or physical is passed on among sibblings. It becomes a way of life. And it doesn't matter who's getting the most or less beatings in the family because the whole time you or your siblings is being chased around and beaten by the father, the child screams bloody murder and cry and hurled of pain while the rest of the family is hiding and shaking and crying because they don't know who will be next. The trauma is just as severe. My mother to this day says the beatings were few and far between and I remember it to be every other day.

All children of violent parents have low self-esteem and hate their looks. They are plagued at a young age by the curse of perfectionism. The child sub-conscious mind hears that little voice that says "Maybe if I'm perfect, he won't beat me anymore and will love me." From then on, you spend your life questioning everything about yourself and looking for approval in the wrong places because your sub-conciousmind will gravitate you to which is familiar to it's programming from childhood.

I've learned all this during my years of therapy and one can only grow and move on toward better functionality after working through 12 steps programs on co-dependency.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Sorry for the long post. Hope it helps.

An enlightening post. Thank you for posting.

 

[blankyluvdoodoo]

This is a very interesting post, thanks for sharing. In my previous posts (I apologize for the errors, I'm on my cellphone) I tried to show that the emotional and psychological scars Michael, LaToya and Janet talk about goes far deeper than the teasing Janet has discussed. In a way, focusing on the teasing is a way to avoid facing the truly painful experience that caused her problem. I'm trying to be as objective and non-judgemental as possible so I will just say that she should explore her relationship with both of her parents. Like you, I wonder why some of the family members have chosen to be public about certain things. Yes they have the right to go public. However, once you open that door willingly, it's nearly impossible to close it.

Also, I've had a discussion with MANY people over beatings/whippings/spankings. And like Ginvid mentioned, many people were spanked growing up and not only are they fine as adults, they later thank their parents for it. What people forget about Joe's spanking is that some of it, I'm not sure of the percentage, had absolutely nothing to do with discipline his children due to bad behavior. Joe allegedly beat and verbally abused his children, preparing them for a showbusiness career. Similar to trainers beating circus animals while teaching them tricks to perform. In a civilized society, we don't accept animals being mistreated like this. We have laws against this and I'm sorry, there is no justification for a grown man verbally attacking, physically throwing his children against a wall and denying them an emotional bond all because they missed a dance step. Is there any wonder why his children would be afraid of him? Add to that the story of Joe and Leonard Rowe at MJ's house weeks before he was killed and Joe is banging on the door, screaming that his problems were MJ's fault and refusing to leave until MJ signed that contract. Now this isn't little J5 Michael, this is 50 year old Michael, father of 3 in his own home yet his father does this? How many of us would have loved to meet Michael and spend time with him yet you have Michael saying he wanted to get to know and spend time with his dad, whom he was made to call Joseph. I don't want to get too far off into this topic because I readily admit that I wasn't there and I don't know what goes on behind closed doors. I will say that MJ said that he made peace with his father. I believe him and I hope he has the peace and acceptance he truly deserved on Earth and I hope that his siblings who struggled with this are able to make peace with their father as well.

good post ,when i think about beating joe and katherine justify it because they wanted to keep their children out og gang and drugs,but when they moved to cali what was the reason behind beating and at that point Michael really had little contact with normal world and he was really in to his career at that point .

 

[ExoticPrincess]

The problem isn't that Janet wrote a book. It seems like everybody does. The problem is that she says her brothers teased her (all of them) yet she is asked about what MICHAEL did.

The problem is again the media take something negative about Michael and say that Janet was verbally abused by her brother Michael. Even though that is not what she is saying right? The public reads this and adds to the negative opinion they have of Michael. Who gives the media the opening to do this but someone in his family again. They should know better or watch how they say things. Michael is dead and the negativity in the media keeps going. I am just tired of it.

For me it's not about Janet writing a book or Michael not being perfect. Nobody is perfect. The media want to make Michael look bad that hasn't changed now that he is gone. His family, friends and fans should all be sick and tired of it. Leave him alone and let him have peace.

.

Agreed!

They might not care what we think...but they still want our money. All of them.

Janet hasn't been relevant in years...but with MJ's passing, she's been giving high profile interviews to discuss MJ's death in exchange for extra publicity for her own projects.

Money talks.

A few years back, she would be caught dead answering MJ-related questions, remember the Oprah interview??

If she agrees to do it now, that is clearly because it suits her purpose. Bring her extra press...like ONLY MJ can. Dead or alive.

I can't say i have'nt said these very same things myself

One very telling statement she made to Oprah is that she had lost Michael as a brother around the time of Thriller. I know there are some who will interpret her words based on what they believe she meant or what they want her to mean; however, I will take Janet at her word. She chose her words deliberately. She didn't say they lost closeness or couldn't spend as much time together, she said she lost him as a brother. If he ceased being like a brother, emotionally, what was he to her at point? Maybe this could explain why she isn't responding like many expect a sister to do. Also, as Michael's body lay in thee freezer at FL for weeks, a family friend/relative gave an interview to a paper and the person seemed livid. He/she said that the Jackson's were fighting over where to bury him, etc... and they treated Michael more like a celebrity than a brother. I will try to find this article when I get home because it can explain a lot about what we are seeing now.

The pics of Michael that she told Oprah that she loves to look at all come from the period that she says he called her those names so there is something much deeper than the name calling going on.

It always struck me as odd when she said that to Oprah, 'cause after that I then started to think, well thats why she seemed so cold talking about him, thats why she's been acting so indifferent towards him.

Maybe Janet isn't grieving or doesn't feel sad because she no longer looked at MJ as her brother.. Didn't she say on Oprah last year that she 'lost Michael as a brother around the Thriller era'.. If she no longer saw him as a brother she was close to maybe that's why she doesn't feel any sorrow over his death. This is the only thing that I can come up with as far as her attitude towards MJ.

As agreed above

I don't think MJ needs a whole lot of defending. His legacy speaks for itsself - his immortalized. Sometimes all that defending cauld actually be worse PR for him actually.

Nope, no worse PR than that of the words and actions coming from his family.

On a personal note, I am tired of people assuming that once you are defending Michael you are doing so because you think he was perfect and he could do no wrong. Yes, some fans need Michael to be perfect for their own peculiar reasons. But most of us recognise Michael as a extraordinary HUMAN BEING. He was a HUMAN BEING who was unfairly and consistently maligned for over 20 years. All fans want is for him to be treated fairly and with dignity.

If the wonderfulness (I know it is not a word) was highlighted and discussed as much as the 'negative' side I, for one, would not be as passionate as I am. Instead, what we get is one story after another that blames Michael for everything. He was not perfect but he was also not the unrelenting villain either. What we are seeking is balance! Plain and simple.

And ain't that the truth!

I find those that criticize us to be hilariously hypocritical. If this was their star, they would want the exact same thing as us. I find it crazy that a Janet fan wouldn't get where we're coming from on this.

Hypocritical to the highest level! for some reason MJ fans are viewed as delusional, while they are level headed, you see it from some posters here acting as though they are here in the best interest of MJ.

And I'm REALLY sick of the Jacksons washing their dirty laundry in public for the vultures to feed on instead of seeking their own private therapy. They keep destroying what's left of their family unit. Very sad.

Bottomline!:yes:

 

[chanel05]

how did she use Michael as a scapegoat. Michael was one of the most famous people every so when janet says my brothers teased me it includes him and of course the media will specifically say Michael when mentioning her brothers. Michael and janet were very close growing up and till the day he passed he still saw her as "dunk". I think i remember Katherine wrote in her book that Janet did not like the nickname at first but eventually she grew to deal with it and took it as an affectionate nickname. Michael often gave nicknames to people like doodoohead, applehead ans etc. Janet made it clear she knew he didn't mean to harm her so how is she blaming him? This book is about Janet's story and every story has a beginning. Janet has to speak about her childhood to reflect on how she felt the way she did, her mentioning the teasing affected her doesn't mean she holds anything against him now.

Couldn't have said it any better

 

[pilinlim]

Here we go again.
My mother also used beat me. However, she did that out of love, out of wanting the best for me and, mainly, to discipline/teach me. Joe, however, beat the life out of his kids out of pure hatred/frustration. He didn't beat them because he wanted to discipline them (remember: you're talking about a person who would spend nights having sex with women in front of his chidlren). He didn't beat them out of love, out of wanting the best for them, to disciple them. Beating your kids in order to teach/discipline them is not abuse. My mother did it with me. BUT, beating the life out of your kids, in the sadistic, with-all-your-strength manner for no reason besides jealousy and pure hatred IS abuse.

Michael would finish an exhausting tour. As soon as he arrived home, Michael would go to bed as he was exhausted. Joe would arrive later as he had been spending the money Michael earned with mistresses. As soon as he would arrive home, he'd go to Michael's room, start kicking the door while yelling at the top of his lungs: "If you don't open the door in five seconds [knowing full well Michael was exhausted], I'm going to kill you, you ugly motherfucker.". Then Michael would open the door and Joe would storm inside the room, yelling for him to sign a contract which only benefited him, never his son, while pushing his son around the room, harrassing and mistreating him. And if Michael didn't sign the contract, we know what would happen: Joe would force him to get naked, oil him down, hit him with ALL his strenght with an iron cord while yelling insults at him. Then he'd put salt in Michael's wounds.

You know what's so shameful about this? It's that this is just the top of top of the iceberg. Joe was NOT old school. My mother was. Joe was AN ABUSIVE, MOSNTRUOUS PSYCOPATH. I'm sorry if I burst some bubbles.

 

[Alma]

Thank you for your wonderful, true posts full of sense, Alayasha and Riviera. ...

 

[StacyJ]

Now Janet is putting Joe on blast.. can I ask why in the hell did Katherine stay married to him? This fool told all of his kids to don't call him Dad/ Daddy call him Joe.. Yet Katherine kept having kids with a man who who didn't want his own kids to call him Dad.. That's strange. Joe had some serious issues and it sounds like he took out his anger and frustrations on his kids.. what a shame.. If Katherine would've left him her kids would've been ok instead of being terrified of their own father..

I wonder if Katherine feels any guilt whatsoever?

 

[Moulin Rouge]

Now Janet is putting Joe on blast.. can I ask why in the hell did Katherine stay married to him? This fool told all of his kids to don't call him Dad/ Daddy call him Joe.. Yet Katherine kept having kids with a man who who didn't want his own kids to call him Dad.. That's strange. Joe had some serious issues and it sounds like he took out his anger and frustrations on his kids.. what a shame.. If Katherine would've left him her kids would've been ok instead of being terrified of their own father..

I wonder if Katherine feels any guilt whatsoever?

Are you just now realizing janet mentioned her father? Janet didn't put him on blast, she didn't reveal anything we didn't know. Michael said the same exact things about 8 years ago.

 

[StacyJ]

Are you just now realizing janet mentioned her father? Janet didn't put him on blast, she didn't reveal anything we didn't know. Michael said the same exact things about 8 years ago.

First time I heard her ever mention being whipped by Joe as she was naked and getting out of the bathtub. Janet was always one to poo poo the abuse MJ had alleged. She basically said a couple of years ago that she was never abused and basically calling MJ a liar like her other brothers and sisters.

 

[Moulin Rouge]

First time I heard her ever mention being whipped by Joe as she was naked and getting out of the bathtub. Janet was always one to poo poo the abuse MJ had alleged. She basically said a couple of years ago that she was never abused and basically calling MJ a liar like her other brothers and sisters.

Stop putting words in people's mouths. No one ever called Michael a liar, they said they didn't feel abused and janet still hasn't said she felt physically abused. Everyone has different experiences. People have their own opinions and they felt their father was more old skool than a big bad abuser and i've realized alot of older people agree. Michael felt abused and he had a right too, it's his body and those are his feelings but if someone sees it differently it doesn't always mean either is lying.

 

[StacyJ]

Stop putting words in people's mouths. No one ever called Michael a liar, they said they didn't feel abused and janet still hasn't said she felt physically abused. Everyone has different experiences. People have their own opinions and they felt their father was more old skool than a big bad abuser and i've realized alot of older people agree. Michael felt abused and he had a right too, it's his body and those are his feelings but if someone sees it differently it doesn't always mean either is lying.

They called MJ a liar, that is what it all boils down too