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It's Just Hit Me

He's always been there and now he's .....not there.

I used to try to dance like him,wanted so much to be him,wore the clothes,tried the moves,but it wasn't quite Mike. ma mans gone.
I'm a grown man but I'm holding back tears here.

He's gone.
 
thats how i have felt this last week since my concert date passed
 
He is here in my heart
and he want to be in yours also
although I miss his physical presence
I can still feel him _he is a bright light
that can not be extinquished ...

their is nothing they can do to stop
his legacy and life power from continuing

keep putting him in thier face
The world will never be able to
get rid of Michael EVER even in death
he lives on stronger than those who are alive

The world is so full of hate
I dont want us fans to be part of it

but we need to vent and let our anger out
and let them know how their actions contributed
to Michaels death ..
 
It's .... starting to get to me, little by little.. like a dam. it'll be one crack, then a pebble, then another until suddenly it's a flood when it finally breaks, and so do I.
 
I only feel I can try and put some of this behind me tonight. Whilst at the o2...just me, a candle, thoughts of Michael and his music to keep me company.
 
thats what i thought .................that i might be able to move forward after the date passed but it just sank in so much on that day that i have felt sadder ever since
 
I know, it hits me too, i think i'm ok but then it hits me again out of nowhere.... I don't think I've ever 'been ok' since his death... only distracted by other things. When I have nothing to distract me, it hits again.

*hugs* to you, we're all in this together.
 
Some days I manage to smile and I feel so thankful that Michael was in my life and that I was able to learn from him, see him, meet him and most of all experience the amazing genius that Michael was.

But on days like today, I sit and feel completely empty inside. It's like there's a hole in my heart and nothing matters. I watch videos of Michael traveling the world and helping the sick, and the dying. And I realise: DAMN. All he wanted was to spread love, to heal and unite and to be loved in return. He was pure, genuine and unselfish.

I don't like the world now that he's gone. The only times I feel slightly better is when I am surrounded by Michael's fans, because they KNOW. They know how special he was, they understand, and they feel the way I do.

When I am not with fans, to me, every single day I'm doing nothing more than surviving.
 
Sending everyone on here a gentle hug. I feel your pain because we all loved him, and we all understand. Nobody has to explain here. I'm so glad we have this forum.
 
aaaaaw you're right. everyone is missing him and we all need each other
 
I know just how you feel. Just like this morning I am really crying now cause I miss him so much. I so badly wish that this was just a really bad nightmare that I can just wake up from. But it is not my heart is still completely shattered in to millions of tiny little pieces. So I will never be completely over his death.
 
This has affetced me so much, i can't stop thinking about him, and it really hurts. I just hope one day I will be able to enjoy Michael without sadness.
 
same here, can't stop thinking about him and really wishing one day i can watch and listen to him again without the tears
 
I've fully accepted it now, but it's taken like 2 months i've realized to get over it fully. I'll always be sad, and the pain is always there. But now i can finally listen and appreciate him instead of intensely lamenting like i did at first.
We love you forever MJ.
 
I've started praying to him and like feeling him being always with me. I feel like he's watching over me and there to give me strength. That's just how I feel, and somehow knowing that makes me think he's not really dead to me, he's alive in my heart... I won't ever let him leave my heart.
 
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