Latest on MJJC

Needing help with a bully?

Tamou

Proud Member
Joined
Jul 25, 2011
Messages
154
Points
0
Location
Ontario, Canada
Okay, so a "friend" (not so much anymore) is bullying me because he knows I love Michael.
I'm a girl, he's a boy, if that makes any difference.
I need help on handling it, because I'm scared to go back to school. He knew I was going to see Michael in concert in London, and he'd always make jokes, but I kind of just shrugged them off. Whenever he'd insult him I'd stand up for Michael but remain respectful, but since his passing he's been worse then ever... He'll call me a freak, call me lame, send me cold hearted messages over facebook, and threaten me.
Threaten, as in, "I'll kill you if you like that freak".
It makes me SO mad, but "Beat it, just beat it".
He's way bigger then me so I'm too scared to stand up.
As fans, we have gone through so much as it is. Everything Michael went through, we went through with him. The media made me very angry as well, but now I'm just scared.

I mean, I think he just wants to scare me out of being a fan, but anyone who knows me knows that would never happen. Even if I WANTED to stop being a fan, I couldn't. It's like I'm stuck, I just love Michael so much. :)
But the fact that I'm getting attacked for it is really sad. I'm in high school, and it's just the one person. A few others have comments, but they're just fooling around and I can handle that, but I'm actually afraid of this guy. I mean, I can't even wear a shirt that says Michael Jackson without him cornering me.
Like most ignorant people, he believes the media and tabloids. I've showed him so many lyrics to Michael's songs (which is pretty much proof alone), yet he just doesn't want to see.
How do I handle this? I'm not one to start screaming and fighting back, I normally just shy away, but I definitely stand up for Michael if anything. I have no problem with that, but how do I stand up for /myself/?
As Michael said, "I'm a lover, not a fighter". Well I'm the same way, and I have a hard time being mean to people as I actually have morals, unlike this guy. :/
Oh and, he has a history of doing this to other people (but I don't think teachers know this). He gets thrills from hurting people in seems, and he's just cruel about everything. I don't understand how someone can live like that and feel good about themselves.

It feels like Michael's with me giving me strength, so thank you Mike. :) :wub:
But I need a little more help from you guys, please. :/
 
I need you to go to your parents or a teacher and tell them that this boy is threatening you!! "I'll kill you" ??? That's just WRONG, very wrong and should be addressed immediately! His parents need to know that he is bullying you and saying things like that to you! Can you block him on facebook? Or if you need to, print out those messages on facebook that he left for you as your proof then take them to a teacher as soon as possible!
 
Yes, but that's just like him... I mean, I don't know if I should take it literally or not, and if I tell my parents they'll get REALLY mad and tell the principal, then he'll really get me.

As for the printing, that would be a great idea, except that I deleted them because they were on my status and it was embarrasing what he was saying to me.
But if he does post anything else, I'll be sure to keep them.:)
 
Last edited:
I'm so sorry you are going through this.. is there a way you can avoid him maybe? Just don't speak to him.. about Michael or anything else.. I know you want to defend Michael and stand up to this bully but if it's only going to make things worse, maybe you shouldn't.
 
But that's the thing. I DON'T speak about Michael to him because I know how he feels about him.
He's in almost all my classes and before school ended he would always talk to me, and whenever I say something to anyone (outside of school, well for now) he always has a rude comment.
If I wear anything supporting Michael, a necklace, a shirt, it attracts him over.
I'll try to stay away from him, but I don't think it's going to work as he's always the one to come to me... I could stop wearing my necklace and stuff, but I really love them. :(
It's good advice, and thank you, but this guy is really tough to deal with. :/
 
you should talk to someone about this..... i am sorry you have to deal with this. but you should talk to someone. at my school we had counselors we could talk to...
is there a mutual friend that can tell the bully to leave you alone? but if someone is saying they are going to "kill you" that is pretty strong.
even if he doesn't mean it literally... the kids sounds like he Needs help. talk to someone. please.
 
mjjfan4ever said:
you should talk to someone about this..... i am sorry you have to deal with this. but you should talk to someone. at my school we had counselors we could talk to...
is there a mutual friend that can tell the bully to leave you alone? but if someone is saying they are going to "kill you" that is pretty strong.
even if he doesn't mean it literally... the kids sounds like he Needs help. talk to someone. please.
Click to expand...
The kid sounds like he needs a punch on the nose as far as I'm concerned.
 
It sounds like talking to a counselor is best. I'm sorry this is happening to you, but the last thing I want to hear is something bad happening because you'd hope he just get over it...Sometimes teens are really emotional. Please talk to someone in charge about this and if they don't give you the support you need, go higher up.
 
You should get with another MJ fan at school or a friend u know that likes MJ and both talk about MJ and praise MJ in front of him.....and then see his reaction. Because with 2 or 3 of you there talking about MJ it wont seem so wierd to him and he'll prob just feel stupid and then u lot can just laugh at him if he says anything!!!!!
 
Last edited:
you need too put a stop to it ..talk to your dad or talk to your head master or get a mate to punch his lights out.but you need too get it sorted because it will just get worse.
1223.gif
 
Hun, first things first, If he's threatening you, you need to tell someone! Whether he's being serious or not he's still harassing you with threats. This kid sounds like the type of kid who needs his ass beat by his parents for some discipline. It's ridiculously immature and just down right mean of him to tease you about something like this.
But really, I suggest you tell your parents. If that were me, the second I got that threat, I'd go straight to my parents. Tell someone before it gets worse. Does he do this to you at school? If so, go to your teachers or principal.
 
People here are right, sweetie. I understand that you are afraid that if you tell someone that it will only get worse, but that will happen anyway if you do nothing - so tell your parents and/or your teachers. And if you have a male friend who's stronger than that loser ask him to defend you. School bullys are basically all the same - they are cowards who always pick on someone who they think is weaker than them. They can dish it out, but they can't take it.
 
Yeah, I would talk to someone about it, principal or teacher. Even if he's not being serious, maybe it will scare him enough to get him to stop. That's not cool. :(
 
I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. :( I wish I lived nearby so I could help you out.
I agree that you should tell someone about this. What do your friends have to say? Maybe they could help you out by standing in solidarity with you. He probably won't feel so clever if there's more than one person he has to confront. Sadly, that's how lame this type of person is. You shouldn't be afraid to go to school, you should be young and carefree and enjoying it. Makes me so mad and upset that someone thinks it's ok to do this! Eugh. Please do tell someone though, it might be the only way you can get this jerk to stop! And please, know that I or anyone here is always here to talk should you need to! *hugs*
 
Delete him and his friends (if you share any) from your facebook.

Talk to the principal of your school and your parents. If they don't react say that you'll contact higher authorities too. He has threated to kill you, even if it's just a joke on his part it's no laughing matter. He has no right to stop you from loving Michael.

I went through years of verbal bullying at school. I just tried to ignore it. If I could go back to those years I'd fight like hell. There was a couple of times when my school mates would contact the principal on my belhaf and tell him that 'raingirl' gets bullied by the boys all the time. It stopped for a while but then a month or so later it was going on like always.
Tell the bully that you are not goint to take his abuse anymore. Tell him that he has no right to say those things to you. Even if your fighting back causes troubles to you, do it.

Power to you. :punk:
Remeber he is the one who is insecure about himself.
 
Thanks a lot guys.
And yes, the threats go on at school as well. As for the friends, to be honest I don't have many real friends. I have about two, maybe three true ones. The others are fun to be around, but I'm not really sure they would want me to drag them into this situation. They may try to stand up for me, but I wouldn't count on them.
In fact, one of my real friends has gotten bullied by the boy too. Not for the same reasons, but we both try to stick together. We stand up in the sense that we say 'Go away' or 'Leave us alone' but as you can tell, it doesn't really work. :p
Ignoring is not an option, and I'm not lying when I say this, but he will hit you. Whether he's trying to hit hard or just trying to get your attention I don't know, but it DOES hurt. Not like a punch in the face, but usually on the shoulder. I don't think he realises how strong he is, or maybe I'm just weak. And I know I should have told teachers or my parents, but I figured if I just stayed on his good side then I wouldn't have to stir things up. Apparently, he doesn't HAVE a good side. :unsure:
The guy's insane, I really think something is wrong with him...
If I ask him why he does these things, he acts as if what he's doing isn't wrong at all and I'M the one that's doing wrong. I'm wrong for liking Michael, and so I deserve that? What a joke...
You guys were right about telling my parents. I did (well, my mom, I'm not that close with my dad) and she told me that if he ever says anything like that again to inform her and she's going to give he** to the school. Not sure if that's a good thing. :unsure:
Hopefully when school starts he'll stop following me, although he doesn't seem to be afraid of anything. :(
Thanks a lot guys, I really poured my feelings and thoughts out and you listened. :)
You were the first people I told, it's a lot easier then telling your family or teachers. Being bullied makes you feel incompetent and weak, but you all made it sound better then that. :D
Sorry for the long post, just trying to answer what everyone was asking or saying!
 
No one deserves what he is doing to you. People like him are cowards and usually covering up insecurities. If the teachers find out what he is really like, they should start keeping an eye on him. You do need to tell people who can make it stop though. Good luck, I really hope he leaves you alone.

By the way I love your siggy!
 
Tamou said:
Thanks a lot guys.
And yes, the threats go on at school as well. As for the friends, to be honest I don't have many real friends. I have about two, maybe three true ones. The others are fun to be around, but I'm not really sure they would want me to drag them into this situation. They may try to stand up for me, but I wouldn't count on them.
In fact, one of my real friends has gotten bullied by the boy too. Not for the same reasons, but we both try to stick together. We stand up in the sense that we say 'Go away' or 'Leave us alone' but as you can tell, it doesn't really work. :p
Ignoring is not an option, and I'm not lying when I say this, but he will hit you. Whether he's trying to hit hard or just trying to get your attention I don't know, but it DOES hurt. Not like a punch in the face, but usually on the shoulder. I don't think he realises how strong he is, or maybe I'm just weak. And I know I should have told teachers or my parents, but I figured if I just stayed on his good side then I wouldn't have to stir things up. Apparently, he doesn't HAVE a good side. :unsure:
The guy's insane, I really think something is wrong with him...
If I ask him why he does these things, he acts as if what he's doing isn't wrong at all and I'M the one that's doing wrong. I'm wrong for liking Michael, and so I deserve that? What a joke...
You guys were right about telling my parents. I did (well, my mom, I'm not that close with my dad) and she told me that if he ever says anything like that again to inform her and she's going to give he** to the school. Not sure if that's a good thing. :unsure:
Hopefully when school starts he'll stop following me, although he doesn't seem to be afraid of anything. :(
Thanks a lot guys, I really poured my feelings and thoughts out and you listened. :)
You were the first people I told, it's a lot easier then telling your family or teachers. Being bullied makes you feel incompetent and weak, but you all made it sound better then that. :D
Sorry for the long post, just trying to answer what everyone was asking or saying!
Click to expand...

Actually, from your posts I'd say you're incredibly strong! He is the one with the problem, not you, and it actually sounds like he needs help. What he is doing isn't normal. =/ You just do what you've gotta do, and stay strong! :D
 
Everyone here is absolutely right.

There is no reason why you should have to "stay on his good side." There is something seriously wrong with this guy/kid(?), and the proper people/authorities need to be notified. Otherwise, you'll constantly live in fear of him. This is not what one "friend" does to another.
 
if this kis is bullying you, fight. I was teased and bullied like crazy when I was in school and I am still suffering from the aftereffects.

Tell him off, tell him to leave you alone, and TELL PEOPLE that he is threatening you. Put a message on your facebook; something like: "Stop threatening me [his name]...are you insane or something?" as your status...and then after a few hours just delete the guy. Also, when he comes up to you, just walk away or tell him LOUD and CLEAR that you don't want to talk to him because he hurts your feelings. Make sure people hear that he's bothering you.
 
Dutchie said:
Also, when he comes up to you, just walk away or tell him LOUD and CLEAR that you don't want to talk to him because he hurts your feelings. Make sure people hear that he's bothering you.
Click to expand...
That's excellent advice.
 
i was brought up to never harm a girl and to if anything help out if a girl asked me i would.
to bully a girl would be admitting your gay because you would be bullying boys instead.
this boy needs a lesson on manners and i am pretty sure he will meet his match before long.
dont feel bad in yourself because of him,thats part of his trick to wear you down.
but please tell your mom and dad or headmaster about it if he carrys on.
he needs to be stopped
1223.gif
 
Dutchie said:
if this kis is bullying you, fight. I was teased and bullied like crazy when I was in school and I am still suffering from the aftereffects.

Tell him off, tell him to leave you alone, and TELL PEOPLE that he is threatening you. Put a message on your facebook; something like: "Stop threatening me [his name]...are you insane or something?" as your status...and then after a few hours just delete the guy. Also, when he comes up to you, just walk away or tell him LOUD and CLEAR that you don't want to talk to him because he hurts your feelings. Make sure people hear that he's bothering you.
Click to expand...


I'll start to do that, I'm just afraid it won't scare him off and he'll get physical or something. It's so dumb how all of this is happening because I love Michael.
It's amazing how the media, all grown ups, got away with bullying Michael, and how his fans also have to deal with it? The world is pretty sick, and it's sad that I'm learning this at my age, I'm not even out of school yet and in the open. I'm not excited. :unsure:
 
in book if the word kill comes up so should the word cops.
 
It's great that you've told your mum, well done :) Does your school have an anti bullying policy? I know it's hard, but I think it's best if you spoke to a teacher about this kid. By the sounds of it there's something really wrong with him?! Hitting a girl? And you're not the only one he's bullying? If he sends you anymore nasty things on facebook, save them all, and print them out. Keep a diary of all the bullying incidents too. Every time he says anything horrible, nasty or is physically violent to you ensure you write it all down. And show it to a teacher (or even the police if it's bad) you'll then have proof, and he can get dealt with accordingly.

You sound incredibly strong. Don't let anyone ever put you down. Bully's are incredibly weak creatures, who are no doubt bullied themselves at home etc and are acting out. But he needs to be dealt woth, so please tell a trusted teacher. Never accept anyone treating you like this. You are human, and have the right to be treated with respect by everyone. This kid needs to be taught that, and he never will if his issues aren't addressed.

Hold on, be strong, you are incredible. Never forget that. Keep fighting, and don't allow anyone to make you ashamed of who you are. Michael is a part of you (just like a part of alot of us, we feel your pain, as I'm sure a fair few of us have come across the haters in our time) Don't be embarrassed about that. He taught us love, and to hope and fight for a better world. We can do that together. We're all here for you sweetheart xx
 
I suggest you take advice from MJs "bad" video. I got picked on in school a lot and my mom always told me to stand up for myself. I didn't say anything to the people and kept it in. I don't do that anymore and I verbally let people know how I feel. I realized people try to take advantage of nice people and you just have to set them straight. Stand up to him if he doesn't stop bothering you, apparently he has nothing going on for him to always be picking on you. If he hits on you again tell on him to your mother and the school.
 
raingirl said:
I went through years of verbal bullying at school. I just tried to ignore it. If I could go back to those years I'd fight like hell. There was a couple of times when my school mates would contact the principal on my belhaf and tell him that 'raingirl' gets bullied by the boys all the time. It stopped for a while but then a month or so later it was going on like always.
Tell the bully that you are not goint to take his abuse anymore. Tell him that he has no right to say those things to you. Even if your fighting back causes troubles to you, do it.
Click to expand...

I have to agree with this. All through school I was told by authority figures to whom I reported my bullying to "just ignore it and they'll stop." They never stop, in fact when they see someone meek and passive who won't fight back, it just encourages them to bully more because they've found an easy target. I think principals, teachers, etc. who say "just ignore it and they'll go away" mean that they don't want to be bothered dealing with the situation.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top