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When you MISS Michael THE MOST

Daryll748

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Sending you lots of :better:to all the MJ fam...
I thought this 'deserved' another topic :yes:

When I miss Michael the most...

I listen to his voice, his music, I watched his vids, I browse through piccies and then my heart is 'fooled' he's still with us... ONLY his body is 'gone' but he still lives in our :heart:

My friend and I 'browse' through sites and still 'shop' for Michael stuff... We even still talk about Michael in 'present' tense...
We fantasize how we would have saved him or treated him :tease:
All 'tricks' that sooths the :heart:

HUGS,

Daryll :tease:
 
It varies for me. There are times that I feel at a loss, more sad...when I search for him while browsing forums, looking at pictures, playing his music...and other times I'm not as sad while doing those things...it's very comforting knowing that MJ fans can meet here and...remember the time, feel the love, support each other and...hope with all our hearts that he knows how much we love him.
 
aw Severus dear :better:

Well, msdeweydiva :better:I get that 'sting' in my heart too...
Yesterday, we went browsing into stores and yep, we hit the CD's/DVD's/ books and for WHO are we searching?
Michael of course...
I found this awesome book with piccies I never seen before... Our hearts jumped of joy and we forgot our 'worry' for a moment browsing through the book of course I bought it :wild:
Its funny and sometimes really HURTS that we can still 'browse' for stuff although we all have what they sell but the STUFF is still sold but the man is MURDERED :boohoo
 
Looking for pictures and listening to his music makes me even more sad :cry:
And when I try to sleep I start crying sometimes because all these thoughts come to my mind.
Or sometimes it just hits me and I start crying when Im sitting at the computer or when I read a book or when Im eating :cry: It just comes over me :(

*hugs* to everyone
 
Misayko;3515407 said:
Looking for pictures and listening to his music makes me even more sad :cry:
And when I try to sleep I start crying sometimes because all these thoughts come to my mind.
Or sometimes it just hits me and I start crying when Im sitting at the computer or when I read a book or when Im eating :cry: It just comes over me :(

*hugs* to everyone
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Ah :better: to you, Misayko...
Hard to believe now but that will get better... Been there done that... My :boohoocomes in waves... but I realize the more I watch, listen, talk about Michael the MORE I feel him ALIVE...
Just REMEMBER... We're HERE for you... This is your HOME where we understand yé... :D
 
Daryll748;3515459 said:
Ah :better: to you, Misayko...
Hard to believe now but that will get better... Been there done that... My :boohoocomes in waves... but I realize the more I watch, listen, talk about Michael the MORE I feel him ALIVE...
Just REMEMBER... We're HERE for you... This is your HOME where we understand yé... :D
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Thank you and Im so happy to have you guys here :flowers:
You.re the only people I can talk to about this and who understand my feelings, because you.re feeling the same :)
 
I miss him the most when I lay in bed at night. I have always ever since I remember listened to his music in the dark quite often before I go to sleep but now I just can't. If I do, the feeling of missing him is overwhelming and it really lasts through the following days as well so I have really just given up with that for now. It's just too intense the feelings it brings.

I also miss him the most when I think back to the old days of when Michael was here and all the fans I used to know that aren't really active in the fan community anymore. Those days that we took for granted, but I'm glad we did because we could just enjoy things without this overwhelming feeling of grief that is always there just ready to take you under from time to time. I miss him, more than I could ever express. I'm still learning how to cope, but I hope one day I will be able to deal with this to a point that when I think of Michael I smile. I know that's what he would want us to do, but that isn't easy!

I love you guys, I'm so glad for every single one of you that make up this community that offers so much understanding!
 
:better: to StaceyMJ
Yep, I do MISS Michael too and it was such :puke: night yesterday but its FUTILE to run as if you do... You gotta run forever right...
Anyway, feel like a "zombie" right now... Didn't sleep through the 'short' night and to stop the nightmare I just popped in my life saver aka MP3 player... That did make sleep for at least 3 hours so... :tease:
I'm so glad we have this place here where you can say what you feel...
Thanks for the :wub: lovelies...
 
I unforunately associate a lot of my interests with Michael :( Whenever I'm out and look up at the sky I think "Michael would love how that looks.". When I see a beautiful sunset I think "*sigh* Michael loved changes in the colour of the sky and how it reflected upon the trees and leaves around us." :( Even writing that now brings tears to my eyes :cry: I took my fiancee to Disney On Ice at the o2 Arena on Thursday and I kept thinking to myself Michael would just love this show :cry:

I listen to him at night. I have a little thing I have done. There is always a very bright star in the sky around my area. It's the brightest star in the sky. I've named it Michael. I just stare at it and get lost in my thoughts about how much I miss Michael and just have long long conversations in my head with him. He was pure innocence and...hell...I just love him to pieces!

:weeping:
 
Thats beautiful :better:Thrillerchild

I've got myself a NEW TOY... A PSP with the game "Michael Jackson, the Experience" :clap:
Its such a COOL and SOOTHING game and yep... It crossed my mind... did Michael KNEW about this game? :(

Then again, when you have to concentrate on the game, you see Michael dance and hear his wonderful voice... I seem to forget the BAD stuff for a moment :dancin:
and I just enjoy the game... its COOL for your concentration and your fine motoric skills as the games at Ergo are boring :tease:
 
I escape whenever I can't handle it. Thanks to Twitter's #TeamParody making the trial easier to bear, I've found less of a need to do that, but as soon as the trial is wrapped up and they all abandon Twitter, it'll be back to those days where I don't know where one day ended and the other one begun...

And now that my doctor has prescribed me suicide pills (generally called antidepressants but it is well-known what they really do is encourage you to kill yourself), well, I don't really want to take them. I'm handling myself pretty well right about now, but as soon as everything is over, maybe I should take them and let them do what they will, right?
 
Severus Snape said:
I escape whenever I can't handle it. Thanks to Twitter's #TeamParody making the trial easier to bear, I've found less of a need to do that, but as soon as the trial is wrapped up and they all abandon Twitter, it'll be back to those days where I don't know where one day ended and the other one begun...

And now that my doctor has prescribed me suicide pills (generally called antidepressants but it is well-known what they really do is encourage you to kill yourself), well, I don't really want to take them. I'm handling myself pretty well right about now, but as soon as everything is over, maybe I should take them and let them do what they will, right?
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I wanted to go on antidepressants myself. But my mother wouldn't allow it. Because of what they could do. Especially since a friend of my mother's from work was on them and then later she jumped off a bridge. So I am glad that you are handling yourself pretty well. I am trying to myself but I do have days that are better than some. Since my mother wouldn't allow me to go on antidepressants. I was forced to find something else that might help my depression. Video and computer games were helping me for awhile. Until I had heard something about Dr. Death in late January of this year. And it just put me right back in to my depression. And they haven't helped since. In fact nothing really has for me. So any more I am just existing and just plain hating my life now. I just found things like video and computer games, reading, and my Bollywood movies something just to drown my constant misery in now.:sad: :boohoo: Especially when I have an unloving and uncaring people in my life that just tends to make my misery more worst for me. Which is what I should have expected from MJ haters. You know the last time I had actually felt happy was back when we still had him. I haven't felt a single ounce of happiness since. I don't even know what that is anymore. Since I totally had forgotten what it is like to be happy. :sad: :boohoo:
 
I know I miss Michael when I have stop listening to his music or stop watching him on youtube. I use to not like watching TII as it gave me the empty feeling. I stop watching after while then started watching it again, it wasn't so bad up until a few weeks ago when we found out the Earth Song MJ ever sang I have stop watching TII altogether. I still have the odd moment or 2
 
MJsBollywoodGirl7 said:
I wanted to go on antidepressants myself. But my mother wouldn't allow it. Because of what they could do. Especially since a friend of my mother's from work was on them and then later she jumped off a bridge. So I am glad that you are handling yourself pretty well. I am trying to myself but I do have days that are better than some. Since my mother wouldn't allow me to go on antidepressants. I was forced to find something else that might help my depression. Video and computer games were helping me for awhile. Until I had heard something about Dr. Death in late January of this year. And it just put me right back in to my depression. And they haven't helped since. In fact nothing really has for me. So any more I am just existing and just plain hating my life now. I just found things like video and computer games, reading, and my Bollywood movies something just to drown my constant misery in now.:sad: :boohoo: Especially when I have an unloving and uncaring people in my life that just tends to make my misery more worst for me. Which is what I should have expected from MJ haters. You know the last time I had actually felt happy was back when we still had him. I haven't felt a single ounce of happiness since. I don't even know what that is anymore. Since I totally had forgotten what it is like to be happy. :sad: :boohoo:
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Your mother is right. Antidepressants are dangerous and have no benefits whatsoever, either in the short or long term. "Doctors" give them to their patients when they no longer want to deal with them and are hoping they go jump off a bridge. I'm on to them. That's why I won't take them until the moment I am ready to do just that. Until then, I'll keep on keeping on. What I actually went to the doctor's for was anxiety, not depression, so I have no idea why she is giving me antidepressants as I am not depressed. But, like I said, I know it is because she wants me to kill myself, but I will not do that.

The only person you can really count on to make you feel better is (aside from those few who actually do genuinely care about you, assuming these people exist in the first place) is YOU. No government drugs (well, that's a lie, some of them will...but those are strongly regulated and seldom given out) will make you feel good, or solve your problems. Life sucks. It always has. It always will. This is Uncle Vanya syndrome, as I call it, we just have to keep on keeping on for the sake of keeping on, as stupid as that may sound, and hope that someday this Hell will lift itself, as if evanesced by a great veil, and something much better will take its place.

But, in this fickle and perpetually changing yet seemingly sterile world, the only thing we have to keep us from drowning in an ocean of a thousand sorrows is the illusory hope each of us holds on to.
 
When I see certain R & B/Hip Hop stars who can't put two words together, or who beat their girlfriends or when I hear sexually explicit lyrics or sexually explicit music videos or see some celebrity behaving recklessly or when some singers are famous and really can't sing a note. That's when I miss Michael. I miss his brand of REAL entertainment. I like that he was decent and gentle. I like that he was intelligent and articulate. I like that he was just nice and unpretentious. And endlessly talented and a true showman. Tough to find all these qualities in many of today's so-called entertainers.
 
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