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Finding meaning in tragedy. Please read. Hope it helps

Thank you, Victoria, for saying that. It was very beautiful and so true. I'm glad to read some of the things I've been feeling myself and to know that others feel the same way. It isn't enough for me either to try to tell myself he's in a better place - even if I believe that he is. I just still keep asking but why now? I guess I'm being selfish, but I think that he just had so much more to give and to teach everyone. Although, we can still learn from him, even after he's gone.

Actually it seems to me that after he's passed, a lot more people are realizing just how good he was, what we all really saw in him, and they are trying to change their own lives. It also helped people to realize that it doesn't matter who you are, you could be gone tomorrow. Don't waste time being angry and upset with everyone. I've read so many things lately from people who saw Michael not long before he died, and almost all of them said the last thing Michael said to them was, "I love you." Now I'm crying again. How great is that? Their last memories of him were good ones because those are the only ones he gave people. That can teach us something.

I've felt so upset about him passing that it's hard for even me to understand. I've cried more over him than some family members, which makes me feel kind of bad. I've had people tell me they understand because their favorite singer had also passed, and I think, "NO, you don't really understand then." Michael was my favorite singer, but he wasn't just that. As you said, Victoria, we all felt that we knew him on a personal level. That is because he gave so much of himself to us. He didn't just sing some words from a page. When Michael said, "I love you, I really do, I love each and every one of my fans," I believed him. I felt it. I don't think he loved us collectively, but he loved us individually. I don't understand how, and I know that doesn't make sense, but I believe it. Somehow he knew how to do that and make each one of us feel special and that he was speaking right to us. That is love!

I am lucky though. I have felt so much pain over the last almost 2 weeks, but it wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't care so much. I was blessed by many years of caring about and loving Michael. I truly believe that, as much as I'm hurting now, that I have been blessed beyond words. Michael has helped all of us, and we do need to learn from him and try to be kind to others, even when they make it hard to do. When something bad happened to me in my life, I heard him singing "You are not alone" in my head, and I thought of all he'd been through in his life. He never gave up, and he certainly went through more than I could ever imagine. He never lost his huge capacity to love and to see the good in people and to try to make the world a better place. If he didn't give up, then we sure can't. Even though we feel broken-hearted right now, we know it's because of how much he loved us and we loved/love him. We have to keep that love going and share it with others. :wub:
 
Victoria, you spoke the words I'm certain we've all been wanting to express. Thank you for reaching out and helping us to connect.

I still break down now and again; the lose and pain are very real. Yet I know true thing, that I am so honored to have been and contineu to be, a Michael Jackson supporter. And you're right, there are no words or antidotes that can sooth our pain, yet simply moving forward...and yes, keep dreaming, no one can take that ability away from you. Michael would want you to keep reaching out.

My heart goes out to each and every one of you.
 
Tomorrow will be the funeral of my boyfriend and I'll take your words in my heart with me Victoria! Thank you!
 
Wow. Just.. wow. That was amazing to read and it was helpful to me. I look at his passing in a completly different light now..

Thankyou!

Edit: Would I be able to post this onto another forum I go on to? I think it will help an awful lot of people on there.. Of course I'll provide links etc to this thread and your name.
 
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Joanne said:
Wow. Just.. wow. That was amazing to read and it was helpful to me. I look at his passing in a completly different light now..

Thankyou!

Edit: Would I be able to post this onto another forum I go on to? I think it will help an awful lot of people on there.. Of course I'll provide links etc to this thread and your name.
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Yes, you can post on another board. I'm glad it helped. Please don't give my name, though. (It's not about me. . . just about the concept.) Just post the words. Links not necessary. Maybe just say originally posted on MJJC?

And Mechi, I'm glad it helped you, too. . . . . . .

love,

Victoria
 
Beautiful message, and I believe you really nailed the essence on what Michael wanted.

What we can do is to strive to be as good and loving as we can be.
 
Victoria83 said:
Our grief is overwhelming, but that is because of the extent of our love. We are lucky, to have had that in our lives. Most people live safe and careful lives, but WE are the ones who gave our hearts away. And now, we bear the pain of the loss. That was always the risk? But, that is better than not to have loved at all? We were not careful. We dared to live and love deeply. How can we bear this loss? I think we can bear it by being proud of ourselves, by applauding ourselves, as complete, and emotional, human-beings who have learned how to love. . . . We have learned something important from Michael. We have learned how to risk to love, that much, and THAT is incredible. It fuels our pain, but can also fuel our survival. Such a love is universal.

So here is what we must do. We must recognize and honor that capacity in ourselves, and then, when we are ready, we must share our gift of knowing how to love that much. We must love our families that much; we must love our friends that much; we must love people across the globe from us whom we have never met, that much; we must LOVE people as we loved Michael, and as much as he loved us. Because, we have already learned how to do it, and we already accepted the risk of giving our hearts away.

We are the ones who love the most. Michael taught us that. And now, it is our responsibility, when we are ready, to share it. Love is profoundly healing, for the world. Your responsibility now, and mine, is to preserve ourselves, to take care of ourselves, and to understand that our great capacity for love is unusual in this modern, media-driven world. When you are ready, your responsibility, and the meaning to be found in this loss, is to share your gift of the capacity to love, that you learned from Michael. I challenge you to do that. I can, and I think you can, too.

peace, and Keep the Faith,

Victoria
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Thank you Victoria _ so much _ i was having a rough time today
That is so beautiful, encouraging and the truth as I see it
I hope it helps many who want to find meaning to all this

He loved us so much _ I truly belive that and his love
lifted my spirit so high and gave me hope _ I so want
to do that for others and keep his message and love alive

myself I have my faith in God and understand
the bigger plan in life death and suffering
we learn and grow stronger and more loving
when we understand and can find purpose in
all of this _ Michaels life and his death - will
help others .. learn to rely on something greater
outside themselves as MJ did for his support and
inspiration even in the most difficult times he continued

I hope this helps us to love stronger and harder and
really make a difference and change in this world that
Michael lived for .. This has only made our love stronger
for Mj and we shoudl also love others as he taught us
that is why he is so honered and great in this world
not becuase he could sing and dance _ His love was
even far GREATER than that and thats what touched
peoples hearts ALL over the world _

I think his death even touched the world in a sugnificant way
to make people see the error of thier ways ..
many who didnt pay him any mind are now greiving his loss
and they are seeing how evil this world can be _ even in death
Michael changed hearts _That was how great and powerful
his love was _ he wanted us to love as he did .. to change
the world _ he asked for our help .. in his song cry

"I cant do it by myself Im gonna need some kind of help"

Michael's GREAT Love is his true Legacy even beyond his
great God given talents. The whole pupose of his talent was
to bring Love and unity in this world and thats what he believed
and he did suceed in doin that _ look at all whom he touched ..
mor than anyone else in this world _ even inspite of all the lies
and accusation _ his love touched MILLIONS .. maybe billions
through his whole life

I weep everyday becuase I miss his presence
Only by sharing him with others and trying to love
as he did _ helps ease my lonelyness for his love

I wish someone else in this world could love me
and light up my heart like he did unconditionaly ..

God is the only other I know who has that capacity
for me ... Michael was Gods shining light in this world
and he is being honored in heaven for being a good and
faithful servant


now its our purpose to continue it by exeling in our
talents and use it for the greater cause _ Love
Michael didnt live or die in vain .. always remember that
Hi Legacy will touch hearts through us forever
I truly belive that _

but each of us has to find their own meaning
and what Love means to them _ to me God is love
and the author of Love ...

remember it is LOVE that Michael brought to this world through his life and death
no matter what your faith or belief is beyond that ..
 
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Thank you to Victoria, eternitys child, and butterflies for your moving and powerful words in this thread. I have been having a difficult time these past two weeks and came to this forum hoping to find something like this to help me find meaning. There are so many deep souls on this forum and I appreciate everything everyone is saying. I can see that the fans here love so deeply, and I have the utmost admiration for everyone who is expressing themselves and reaching out to help others in this painful time.

Thank you so much for posting. I will certainly re-read and re-read and strive to spread MJ's brand of unconditional love.
 
Victoria reading this helped! You have giving our grief the right words. I'll keep this in mind wherever I go.
You are blessed with such an incredible writing (translating feelings into words) gift!
 
Numbness is my friend right now,
It's slowly taking hold,
Michael I miss you so much,
Why does the world have to be so cold?!!!!!
 
Victoria83 said:
Our grief is overwhelming, but that is because of the extent of our love. We are lucky, to have had that in our lives. Most people live safe and careful lives, but WE are the ones who gave our hearts away. And now, we bear the pain of the loss. That was always the risk? But, that is better than not to have loved at all? We were not careful. We dared to live and love deeply. How can we bear this loss? I think we can bear it by being proud of ourselves, by applauding ourselves, as complete, and emotional, human-beings who have learned how to love. . . . We have learned something important from Michael. We have learned how to risk to love, that much, and THAT is incredible. It fuels our pain, but can also fuel our survival. Such a love is universal.

So here is what we must do. We must recognize and honor that capacity in ourselves, and then, when we are ready, we must share our gift of knowing how to love that much. We must love our families that much; we must love our friends that much; we must love people across the globe from us whom we have never met, that much; we must LOVE people as we loved Michael, and as much as he loved us. Because, we have already learned how to do it, and we already accepted the risk of giving our hearts away.

We are the ones who love the most. Michael taught us that. And now, it is our responsibility, when we are ready, to share it. Love is profoundly healing, for the world. Your responsibility now, and mine, is to preserve ourselves, to take care of ourselves, and to understand that our great capacity for love is unusual in this modern, media-driven world. When you are ready, your responsibility, and the meaning to be found in this loss, is to share your gift of the capacity to love, that you learned from Michael. I challenge you to do that. I can, and I think you can, too.

peace, and Keep the Faith,

Victoria
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Thanks for your post, that is really, really beautiful.
 
Mechi said:
Tomorrow will be the funeral of my boyfriend and I'll take your words in my heart with me Victoria! Thank you!
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ive just found this thread and read your entry, im so sorry for your loss (everyone says that when u lose someone and even though they genuinely mean it, it never takes away your pain)

Can i ask what happened?

If you had to sum MJ up in key words i would choose : Kind,caring,talented,gentle,dignified,shy, etc - at no point would key words that apply to modern life ever apply to him like - selfish,mean,rude,egotistical. but thats how the modern world is - were taught by the media / pop stars / even politicians its ok to say or do anything if it gets you what u want .. MJ got where he was by hard work and being humble, maybe because those qualities that MJ had are so rare (not including natural talent) its those qualities that made him loved by so many.
 
E-smooth said:
i need help now i dont know what to do my life is falling apart!!
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We are here to listen and help -- if you don't mind, maybe you'd like to start a thread so more people see it and can help support you? I'm not sure people always check back on these sticky posts -- I saw this because I subscribed to this thread a while ago.
 
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