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I would have seen him by now...

WeAreTheWorld

WeAreTheWorld

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I got home from London yesterday. Somehow I managed to make it a Michael-trip after all, even though... you know. I bought SO much Michael-stuff, listened to his music, wore my Michael necklace all day long, took pics in Madame Tussauds, wore t-shirts and bla bla...

Whatever.... my point is, it became a MJ trip.
And, of course, I went to the o2 on the 26th. Luckily I met some wonderful fans there who I could talk to and distract myself from the fact that right at that moment, I would not have been standing outside in the rain, putting up some pictures of Michael on the wall, but actually seeing him, alive, singing and dancing.
I did pretty well. I felt sick all through but I managed to laugh a bit, and even do some really bad dancing to Smooth Criminal and Billie Jean.

And then, on the bus to the airport, I broke down again. I cried my eyes out, and I still can't make it stop.
I thought I was fine. At o2 I thought I was feeling better for the first time in a month. But now... It's all just crashing down on me again...
I would have seen him by now. I would have been at the concert.
I would have seen him dance, smile, heard him sing, talk, say "I love you!" and that voice, that wonderful angelic voice being all out of breath. I would have seen him bite his lip, you know the way he always does that? Oh, and the moonwalking... and the crying, the laughing....

I just can't take this. I though the trip would make it all easier. But I can't handle this anymore then I could before. It's getting worse, and I don't understand how that's even possible. I feel like I'm cut off from the whole world. I don't feel like doing anything anymore.
I can't live without hearing his voice, but when I do put on his music I break down all over again.

It's been over a month. A month?! I can't believe it. It feels like I'm still at that first day. I don't know what to do, I feel like I'm losing my mind. I'm sorry. I just needed to get this off my chest.

How are you all doing?
 
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Awww, sweetie, your post just tore my heart to shreds...
I really don't know what to say to make this better, all I can tell you is that I'm feeling your pain, I really do...
This bit: "...It's getting worse, and I don't understand how that's even possible. I feel like I'm cut off from the whole world. I don't feel like doing anything anymore.
I can't live without hearing his voice, but when I do put on his music I break down all over again..." - this is me, I feel exactly like that.
I'm just sending lots and lots of warm hugs your way.
Hope we can all make peace with this one day, although it seems so impossible to me now... :cry:
 
Fluffy_Oz said:
Awww, sweetie, your post just tore my heart to shreds...
I really don't know what to say to make this better, all I can tell you is that I'm feeling your pain, I really do...
This bit: "...It's getting worse, and I don't understand how that's even possible. I feel like I'm cut off from the whole world. I don't feel like doing anything anymore.
I can't live without hearing his voice, but when I do put on his music I break down all over again..." - this is me, I feel exactly like that.
I'm just sending lots and lots of warm hugs your way.
Hope we can all make peace with this one day, although it seems so impossible to me now... :cry:
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I can't imagine a time when I actually will have accepted this and learned to live with it. But thank you for your words, really. And I hope that you too will find some way to feel better, I do.
I just hate this. It's not fair. We shouldn't have to go through this. None of this should have happened. I don't understand it.
How can life be so unfair? This is just too much.
 
No, it shouldn't have happened.
When I get to thinking of things unfair, this - this is number one.
We need him so much...

I'm all torn up again today...:depressed:
 
Fluffy_Oz said:
No, it shouldn't have happened.
When I get to thinking of things unfair, this - this is number one.
We need him so much...

I'm all torn up again today...:depressed:
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I'm all torn up now... again. Jeez. Yes, we do need him. So much.
I still can't believe that he's gone. It's too much.
 
I keep trying to avoid the topics where people talk about the days they were supposed to see Michael. I read one on the day his first concert was supposed to be and I couldn't stop crying.

Oh gosh, I wish I hadn't read this. :( Made me really sad. I wish we all could go back in time to prevent it.
 
Court.ney.x said:
I keep trying to avoid the topics where people talk about the days they were supposed to see Michael. I read one on the day his first concert was supposed to be and I couldn't stop crying.

Oh gosh, I wish I hadn't read this. :( Made me really sad. I wish we all could go back in time to prevent it.
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I'm sorry if this post made you sad... I just needed to get this off my chest. Yeah, I wish it could be that simple. It feels like it's all just a bad-dream, too surreal and impossible to be true. Not Michael.
Of all people... why him?
 
WeAreTheWorld said:
I'm sorry if this post made you sad... I just needed to get this off my chest. Yeah, I wish it could be that simple. It feels like it's all just a bad-dream, too surreal and impossible to be true. Not Michael.
Of all people... why him?
Click to expand...

Don't be sorry, it's good you're sharing that with us. Most of us can relate.
I know what you mean. It still doesn't feel real at all and still feels like last week.

 
I don,t know what to say, but even if I didn't have tickets and haven,t been to London, I do share your pain and I feel as bad.

Love and Peace to you sweety.
Hugs
 
WeAreTheWorld said:
I got home from London yesterday. Somehow I managed to make it a Michael-trip after all, even though... you know. I bought SO much Michael-stuff, listened to his music, wore my Michael necklace all day long, took pics in Madame Tussauds, wore t-shirts and bla bla...

Whatever.... my point is, it became a MJ trip.
And, of course, I went to the o2 on the 26th. Luckily I met some wonderful fans there who I could talk to and distract myself from the fact that right at that moment, I would not have been standing outside in the rain, putting up some pictures of Michael on the wall, but actually seeing him, alive, singing and dancing.
I did pretty well. I felt sick all through but I managed to laugh a bit, and even do some really bad dancing to Smooth Criminal and Billie Jean.

And then, on the bus to the airport, I broke down again. I cried my eyes out, and I still can't make it stop.
I thought I was fine. At o2 I thought I was feeling better for the first time in a month. But now... It's all just crashing down on me again...
I would have seen him by now. I would have been at the concert.
I would have seen him dance, smile, heard him sing, talk, say "I love you!" and that voice, that wonderful angelic voice being all out of breath. I would have seen him bite his lip, you know the way he always does that? Oh, and the moonwalking... and the crying, the laughing....

I just can't take this. I though the trip would make it all easier. But I can't handle this anymore then I could before. It's getting worse, and I don't understand how that's even possible. I feel like I'm cut off from the whole world. I don't feel like doing anything anymore.
I can't live without hearing his voice, but when I do put on his music I break down all over again.

It's been over a month. A month?! I can't believe it. It feels like I'm still at that first day. I don't know what to do, I feel like I'm losing my mind. I'm sorry. I just needed to get this off my chest.

How are you all doing?
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:cry: that broke my heart :cry: It is great that you had a 'Michael' trip. I know that feeling when reality comes crashing in, it is so hard.

I think we are all pining for what could have been :hug:
 
Miss_star said:
:cry: that broke my heart :cry: It is great that you had a 'Michael' trip. I know that feeling when reality comes crashing in, it is so hard.

I think we are all pining for what could have been :hug:
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Yeah. I hate it... I mean all the "what if"s... it's driving me crazy.
I love this place. How everybody understands each other you know... I mean, I don't know what I would have done without it...
I just hope we all will get better.... in time. Somehow. It seems pretty impossible..
 
There's just so many things going through our minds right now its scary :( You are definitely NOT alone and being on here does have its own theraputic qualities.
 
*hugs* This made me cry :cry: :( I can't believe it!!! It really does feel like the first day. These past weeks have all been blurred into one horrible, horrible day. :( I'm torn up. I'm so glad you still had a MJ day though. :hug:
 
MJJ Lover xOX said:
*hugs* This made me cry :cry: :( I can't believe it!!! It really does feel like the first day. These past weeks have all been blurred into one horrible, horrible day. :( I'm torn up. I'm so glad you still had a MJ day though. :hug:
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Oh don't cry :(
 
same here, still can't believe it, although it has sunk in more this week cos of monday being my concert date. you're right that the past weeks are blurred into one horrible day..........feel like time has stood still in the moment we heard the news
 
ameliajayne said:
same here, still can't believe it, although it has sunk in more this week cos of monday being my concert date. you're right that the past weeks are blurred into one horrible day..........feel like time has stood still in the moment we heard the news
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Oh I'm so sorry to hear that. I know how you feel, I really do... I just can't believe so many of us got our dreams ripped away like that... and that he just... no. No. No.
He had so much more to do. To give. They took that from him. From his family. From us, his fans. It's not fair. I can't take it.
 
aaaaw thanks. its the unfairness of it all thats so hard. at any age and any time and circumstance it would have been hard to lose Michael but like this......just terrible
 
ameliajayne said:
same here, still can't believe it, although it has sunk in more this week cos of monday being my concert date. you're right that the past weeks are blurred into one horrible day..........feel like time has stood still in the moment we heard the news
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I will never forget that day as long as I live :cry:

WeAreTheWorld said:
Oh I'm so sorry to hear that. I know how you feel, I really do... I just can't believe so many of us got our dreams ripped away like that... and that he just... no. No. No.
He had so much more to do. To give. They took that from him. From his family. From us, his fans. It's not fair. I can't take it.
Click to expand...

yeah.....it's not fair :cry:
 
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