What are you doing this very second?

Just wondering why these things happen. Why good people are taken? That will be my first question to God someday, why did you take Michael from us like this? A man who has given the world so much even when he got nothing but bad in return, only the love from us, his family and children seemed to be enough for him. He deserved so much more, so much more. So why did you take him?

And now I am thinking, how we go on with this now? How do we accept this and carry on without a light that was present in all of our lives whilst he was here? I feel as though the light has gone.

This aching feeling I have in my chest... it is emptiness. There will never be a sorrow like this I will feel again. We lost more than an entertainer, we lost our earthbound angel. This is too hard...
 
trying 2 make sense of all that has happened in the last few days....
 
Thinking back to last week especially Thursday and things that were said and feeling bothered by it because there were reasons for it, the words all make sense to me, like they were a prophetic vision :mello:..................and I can't seem to process something in my head that I should just let go but it's bothering me.....like how can the last post be after 1pm? :mello:

Just thinking outloud I guess.................
 
Last edited:
Just laying here on my bed and seriously thinking about going downstairs to watch my 1987 Bad Yokohama, Japan concert. All I can think about is wanting to watch my Shake Your Body performance. Especially that one scene in that performance.
 
:better:

Just trying to cope I guess. So hard. The rehearsal pictures... :(

I know which is why I don't even want to think about looking at them right now. Because it is going to make me cry. As for me I am still trying to remember Michael in more happier times. But it is still extremely hard though without wanting to cry. I am going to go downstairs right now and watch that MJ performance that I can't seem to stop thinking about. Because that did make me feel a little bit better by watching that.
 
after all those moments and scesns I wached on tv which I think I'm never gonna believe this is my first time typing..
I cried so bad that right now I dont have the strength to cry...just staring..my mind aint working...I'm startng to hate everything:(
I'm really so much heartbroken and in deep pain I barely can talk
I hate it that I'm alive...:(((((((((((((((((((((((((
I wish I could sleep and never wake up again
today I could pray for him cuz Im still in a big shock I cant i dont wanna belive he's gone!!!!!!!!!! I just cant bear it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel him inside me he's with me I feel it
yesterday I could go to work and my dear friend Gandom whos id is mj'sgaurdianangel went with me I didnt feel goo at all she was with me the whole time
I feel I have no dreams anymore...
 
Just sitting here watching my baby's Denmark HIStory Concert. While thinking that I just might be starting to become obsessed with my baby again. Like I was during the HIStory Era. I was just so obsessed with him back then. And I have been a Michael Jackson fan for over 25 years now.
 
Thinking alot about life, knowing truth, cherishing in my heart forever all the signs that I recognized and was shown...I paid attention :).....God knows all.....and wondering if I have strep throat, I know the feeling and it sure feels like I do. :mello:
 
Typing....

And laughing that I just typed that....

And reading my special Michael Jackson commemorative issues....
 
Just sitting here and really rediscovering my love for Michael. Just to make up for all months and years that I had not felt like watching or listening to him. Right now I am watching the prison version of his They Don't Care About Us video.
 
Re-evaluating and removing myself from alot of meaningless things, channeling positive energies into my art and some other things.....and hoping Neverland is where he will rest, it's so beautiful and peaceful.......
 
I was cleaning earlier and when I was vacuuming my framed Thriller album fell off the wall and the glass cracked on the frame.

I felt horrible but I've decided to go through my Michael clippings and make a new piece of art to display. Now I'm diving into my art supplies. :)
 
Back
Top