MJsBollywoodGirl7
Proud Member
Listening to my beloved Michael and getting ready to go to bed. I just wish I could sleep forever. Because I miss Michael so much when I am awake. :weeping:
I know it really is hard. :hug: I have depression, and my depression was so bad today that I took a lot of Xanax. My grief is so intense and it is only getting worse everyday. I feel more empty and lost everyday. I thought I was getting better and then something snapped and I am a mess again. :boohoo: It is like I take 2 steps forward in this game and then draw a go back to the beginning card.
That is how it is with me. I truly thought I was slowly getting over my depression over Michael. Until I had that really sad MJ dream last week which cause my depression to become worst. And I really did thought I stop having those sad MJ dreams. And I too still wish I could sleep forever. I just tend to miss and think about Michael too much when I am awake.
Right now I am just going up to bed to get a couple of hours of good comforting sleep. Hopefully maybe a little bit more than that. Which that is all the sleep I can really get anymore. My depression is just not letting me get the amount of sleep that I used to get. And I so miss that.