I've had this on my mind tonight while praying for children... children that are gone. I've had some of these on my mind, who had to be taken away from their parents and family due to another type of abuse, and oftentimes, the most traumatic, and in this case...deadly: neglect.
A few days ago, one of the most tragic - if not, the most tragic and unfortunate event involving children happened here in my country. 5 infants perished at a maternity from the country's capital, because most likely a very ancient air-conditioning system blew up, melting an entire room, if not more. The babies were left unsupervised, because the nurse responsible with their supervision (there should have been more, but the medical system here can easily be likened to one in, say, Somalia) was partying, celebrating, oddly enough, Saint Mary - the Assumption of the Virgin, a Christian Orthodox and Catholic day - with other doctors and nurses. So, I believe, most of those poor babies passed on that sacred day... Very odd, like it was a true sign... or rather a simply ominous thing. So 5 babies had to die, some partly burned in a hell of 200 degrees, others being intoxicated from the gas, literally, the temperatures were so high, that all the plastic in that maternity room melted. In addition, 6 more infants are now struggling to stay alive, they are intubated, having suffered burns on 40 to 60 percent of their already fragile body, some having been delivered ahead of time. It wasn't enough the previous state of the... system, of the human nature, or the poverty state here, with so many children's homes, some kids being sheltered in inhumane contexts years ago, now so many had to die, and the whole staff, the mothers, the rest of the babies in the maternity had to be moved to others hospitals. Well, at least they were fortunate enough to carry their babies alive.
This is making me speechless now, I can't really add anything more to this. Just that I was just thinking about them tonight, and suddenly Michael pops up in my thoughts, not thinking what he would think of this tragedy, but thinking that those innocent angels must be with him now. They must all be with God now, and that's the only solace there is, 'cause there isn't another one here on Earth, lots upon lots of things don't make sense in here and one can't take solace in. And immediately this juxtaposition between Michael and the babies led me to remember his words from those tapes fraudulently released by that Rabbi, because they were fraudulently released. I had to check the Jetzi site again for the exact quotes, which bear a totally unexpected and eerie resonance now that he isn't here anymore as well. When asked by the Rabbi if he was scared of death, he says: "Yes.", before that saying "Life is very beautiful and precious". Then adds, on being asked if he thinks there are children playing in Heaven: "Oh, God, I pray that that is what it is like. [...]", he says. "I would think so [that there are adults in there too], and I would think that they are very childlike. [...] Just a happy garden, a happy peaceful garden. I pray that it is like that.", after which he adds: "I always said I want to be buried right where there are children. I want them next to me. I would feel safer that way. I want them next to me. I need their spirit protecting me. I always see that in my mind and I see myself and I hate to see it. I see myself and I see children lying there to protect me."
Let's not think about being buried, let's remove that thought, but try to see through beyond that, beyond this existence. I want to see and I try to imagine him up there being surrounded by child angels, the very essence of innocence people here always tried to rob him of one way or the other. Most adults. Some women go 'Oh, but he had his share of fun, his women' and everything, 'Enough with the Peter Pan crap, we all know what Michael really was like'. No, those that said that and still say it, especially those posting either fan fictions or embellished juicy stories on other boards on his sex life (I mean really juicy stories, some turning downright disgusting that you can feel really bad vibes), those betraying his trust and anulling his privacy don't know a thing, don't respect him and they're just those that seek to bury all trace of innocence existing in him, declining it like it wasn't ever there, and want to make other people suffer and think there is no such thing as innocence in a grown-a** male. But it is not because of "normal" people like that that Michael survived in this life for so long, but because of children, his children and everything innocent. And because of his own innocence which he always had fought to maintain. And because of the sheer godlike goodness in his heart. That is the truth. And he said so himself, but a lot believe he was lying. Well, when was he ever truly taken seriously by most here? He was only human, but no, he wasn't like the other humans or men out there, not by a long shot. And so many will always refuse to see that and are too blind to see that, no matter what.
I diverted more or less from the topic, because some things really need to be said when virtually nobody does it.
But I just wanted to type all this and share this terrible account regarding those poor burned babies. And the hope that they are indeed in a better place now. The chances the other 6 surviving ones have are slimmer by the minute, and some are burned so badly, that one doesn't even know what they personally wish for them. How could one ever survive like that? You cannot undo what happened. I just say I wish them no suffering. No matter what. Innocence will never die.