Those “Crazy Michael Jackson Fans:” Maybe we should listen?

ginvid

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I got this from another site. I wanted to thank Lacienega for posting it. :huggy:

The letters come from all over the world—Canada, Indonesia, Greece, Italy, France, Belgium, Japan, Germany, Africa, Romania, Viet Nam… people everywhere are grieving Michael. Many have had visions, visitations and messages from him after his death. Some are doing work on his behalf and some are reclaiming his legacy. All of them understand on a very deep level that this man was special.

Michael’s death had an impact on fans, admirers and even people on the outer orbits of anything Michael. Many have asked why they have been so impacted by this singular event and this singular individual. The short answer is that Michael awakened many on the planet before his death and his death itself awakened many more. People who have never before been interested are researching him. Many who have not considered themselves talented are now finding their inner artist. And many thousands more are doing humanitarian work around this globe in Michael’s name—“Michaeling” by donating to charities, organizing fund raisers, holding conferences and gifting needy children and vulnerable others. They are taking Michael’s “you can change the world” literally and applying it to their lives and work. They are making Michael proud. While they feel a little better, the personal grief remains intense.

What they often don’t understand is how and why their grief is so gritty and so deep. Some of these Michael people are new advocates never having been fans or listened to his music. Some are long time fans who have followed Michael’s career since the days of the Jackson Five. But all have in common their admiration and affection for Michael Jackson.


Many of them have told me they are surprised by the impact Michael’s passing had on them—equivalent to a magnitude 7 or 8 earthquake on the Richter Scale. The ones who didn’t know Michael, didn’t listen to his music are really puzzled how affected they are by his loss. Some of them have experienced this grief as they would have a close loved one yet they never knew him before. Some didn’t know how deeply they could hurt. Some feel as if his leaving awakened something in them. It did. Many embarked on a personal spiritual journey begun by an emergency that his death triggered. Janet Jackson said “To you Michael was an Icon; to us Michael was family.” While that is technically true if measured by flesh and blood, Michael was the lifeline of many. He was the one voice of sanity in a world gripped by so much insanity. For many, he was their hope, their confidante, their role model, their leader or guru. He represented the way out or the way forward. He was someone who came from nothing and became something larger than life. Michael’s voice soothed. His lyrics put many of their hopes, thoughts and prayers into words. For some, he represented their light in a world that was otherwise hopelessly dark.


When Michael Jackson left this planet he took his immediate light with him. That light was anchored here for 50 years and its sudden withdrawal left people reeling and feeling empty. Their tears were and are spontaneous, their sorrow is suffocating. Many not only did not know him before, but they did not know their own spectrum of feelings before.

The seminal work by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross on Death and Dying identified a roadmap of what the normal grieving process looks like. That first work has been expanded upon since it was first introduced and there are many models. Nobody follows the predicted path exactly, and the layers of grieving can mingle and be revisited at any stage. The progression of grief usually follows the path of: Initial shock, denial, pain, guilt, anger, bargaining, depression, reflection, loneliness, working through, reconstruction, acceptance, and hope. When an individual works through sufficient grief, there may be a reprieve period where feelings are muted and the process is not linear but cyclic.

In the case of Michael Jackson the normal process of grieving is complicated by many factors that do not accompany most losses and the grieving of the lost object of affection. Those who knew Michael personally have had a difficult time but the fans have had the most difficult.

The fans, while they knew Michael intimately, did not actually meet him and weren’t a part of his inner circle. Instead of being involved and included in the provisions of dealing with his preparation, funeral, interment, visitations and so on, they are forced to be mere observers and “outsiders.”The y have had no say in how Michael’s passing was handled. For most, Michael was an intimate part of their lives and being an outsider leaves them with a feeling of helplessness.

Add to that the impossibility of the media and the press coverage of Michael and how he has been, and is now—portrayed so visibly in the world. They know the man’s heart and they have researched the facts and know him to be an innocent. They also know what a consummate humanitarian Michael was and how that part of his life has been overlooked.

The media managed to hypnotize a public into believing a caricature of this man and just continues to spew the party line and each time that happens, the fans who know better wince. Not only do they wince, but they feel that knife go into his back and empathically, theirs each time the lies are repeated. Once again, they feel helpless. There is also the issue of those “unauthorized biographers” whose careers were, and wealth was, built upon the dismemberment of a man who truly was a light unto the world. The man who was the world’s greatest cheerleader, humanitarian and philanthropist was turned into a dark figure in the collective memory of the twentieth century and that hurts. It is especially vile when the realization hits that the dismembering of this gentle man was perpetrated only for profit. The manufactured books and stories about Michael Jackson sold and billions of dollars were made from siphoning the life from the man.

Fans are angry not just because that is a phase of the journey of grief; they are a disenfranchised voice of reason. They are the whistleblowers who are trying to tell the hypnotized public that they are under the influence of an illusion and that this practice is not only dangerous but inhumane. They also have to deal with the disdain that has developed about “those crazy Michael Jackson fans.” The frenzy among the fans is somewhat an acting out of their anger, grief and helplessness. It’s true that some of it appears crazy and doesn’t help Michael’s legacy and is a lashing out from frustration. They don’t know how else to do it. They are flailing in grief and aiming at anything that moves. They are in the throes of it, their backs to the wall in order to hold themselves up. It’s not pretty sometimes but grief is not lovely. And senseless loss is the worst kind. They know Michael did not have to die.

Michael Jackson fans are grieving in a way that is not normal in an atmosphere that is not normal. Normally the deceased is eulogized in a reverent way, their contributions to others and the world highlighted. Their lives are celebrated and revered. Normally, they have some closure. There is no closure with the death of Michael Jackson. It is not a normal grieving process because the hype, reaction, media slant and opinions of those who didn’t know Michael taint the process. If the real Michael Jackson were globally exposed tomorrow and people would actually see how they have been duped and led by the nose into believing the tabloid version of the man, the fans could take a deep breath. If the real story were actually released into the culture and people started to understand this one they have believed an enigma, the fans would have some hope. If the whole sorry mess were exposed for what it was and the world was truly informed about the truth of this story, and an acknowledgement was made of the damage, the fans could begin normal grieving. And eventually they would heal.

So it is important to understand that those “crazy Michael Jackson fans” may be up to something important. While some are hostile and misguided and they act out their anguish in ways that are sometimes destructive and not always helpful or pretty, they really are trying… They are trying to save Michael and save themselves from a cruel world that mistreats really, really badly—its greatest treasures. They are trying to save the world from its delusions. They are trying to resurrect the truth. They are trying to construct an honest humanity because they are deconstructing tolerance for untruths and reconstructing humanity’s compassion. They are trying to prevent another human being from dismemberment for sport and for profit. They are trying to live Michael’s legacy—to heal the world and make it a better place. They are holding up a mirror to the world and saying: “look here: look what happened, look what was done to this human being; do you like what you see?” They do that for Michael because that is what Michael did. And he was crucified for it. They are trying to bring back humanity and are bringing salvation back. Maybe we should take into consideration what it is that they are actually grieving and maybe, if we can get past our judgment, we should listen.

By Rev. Barbara Kaufmann

http://www.innermichael.com/2010/10/those-crazy-mj-fans-maybe-we-should-listen/
 
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so it is important to understand that those “crazy michael jackson fans” may be up to something important. While some are hostile and misguided and they act out their anguish in ways that are sometimes destructive and not always helpful or pretty, they really are trying… they are trying to save michael and save themselves from a cruel world that mistreats really, really badly—its greatest treasures. They are trying to save the world from its delusions. They are trying to resurrect the truth. They are trying to construct an honest humanity because they are deconstructing tolerance for untruths and reconstructing humanity’s compassion. They are trying to prevent another human being from dismemberment for sport and for profit. They are trying to live michael’s legacy—to heal the world and make it a better place. They are holding up a mirror to the world and saying: “look here: Look what happened, look what was done to this human being; do you like what you see?” they do that for michael because that is what michael did. And he was crucified for it. They are trying to bring back humanity and are bringing salvation back. Maybe we should take into consideration what it is that they are actually grieving and maybe, if we can get past our judgment, we should listen

by rev. Barbara kaufmann

http://www.innermichael.com/2010/10/...should-listen/
I thank you for sharing this truth.
angel3r.gif
 
Great article! Read it before but it's good to read it again, feel a little less "crazy"
 
Thank-you so much for posting this article...I feel an almost sigh of relief, that yes someone gets it. Besides that is probably one of the most complimentary articles on fans that I have seen lol
 
Thanks for posting it.

"Maybe we should take into consideration what it is that they are actually grieving and maybe, if we can get past our judgment, we should listen." :clapping:
 
GREAT article! Thank you for posting!

I didn't feel crazy to begin with though because I'm apart of this community with a bunch of people who feel the exact same way I do. We fans are so lucky, I think.
 
Thanks for posting this. I see myself in this article. I often try to analyze why this particular death has impacted me the way it has, unlike any other. Also, it's rare when the fans are acknowledged for the loss they are suffering.
 
I appreciate that article so much, it pin points so well what we as MJ fans have been going through.
 
Yes. It is a great read. If Rev.Kaufmann gets it then I'm sure there are many more
who NOW "get it". Gets us, as fans. Actually we are more than fans, we are Michael's
extended family who love him and miss him deeply.

Thank you for posting.
 
Thank you Ginvid. I love this article and glad to see it posted again today
I dont think many fans are even aware of the deeper reasons MJs death effected them so profoundly.
Rev Kaufman is so intune with what Michael fans are going through and that our actions and reactions
over Michael death carry a much deeper meaning. Besides the loss of Michael we are grieving injustice,
the loss of innocense in this world. That many of US only had or knew though Michael.
 
That is a powerful article indeed. It is so freeing! A gazillion thanks to the author!
 
It's a relief to hear from someone who understands it all so well, and who explained not only the significance Michael had to the world and the disservice and great evil the Media and those who support it have done to him, but the grieving process fans are going through and why some act the way they do. I think it's important to understand, and some people are doubtlessly insensitive and cruel, but if even one person who isn't a Michael Jackson fan reads this and understands what we are going through, it will have changed the world a bit.
 
im speechless... The grieve part is soo true. for days i couldnt cry and now i teared up really.. Its all soo true i cant get my arms around it. Its true that grieving being an outsider is very difficult. fam dont understand you have to be another fan to understand the grieve the pain the anger about how michael was portrayed and what he had to deal with when he was alive.

And most of all he should not have died! It wasnt his time!

that makes grieving much more difficult. Also being so many miles and countrys away you just cant visit him and pay your respect..

:(
 
Thank you for posting this great article. I found myself in it and there is so much truth in it so that it gives hope for the future.:)
 
Thank you for sharing. These words describe exactly how (and probably most of us) I feel. We're trying to set straight an injustice that has been done to Michael. Not only when he was alive, but now also when he's gone. Now he can't speak out anymore, we have to do it for him. Hopefully one day we willr each our destination of getting Michael justice on what he was about as a human being and not what the press made everyone to believe was him.
 
^Indeed. Even being in the same country as him, if you find yourself at the opposite end [East Coast] and without the means and resources to travel even to an adjacent state, [much less all the way to California!], the isolation exists in iron curtain-esque magnitudes. Knowing no other MJ fans in my area, you guys are my sole lifeline when it comes to Michael. The grieving process is harder to process when you can't freely talk about the person in question to a sympathetic/understanding audience, so the dialogue and external coping which should ideally take place during the process from shock to acceptance/renewed hope for the future is stunted, a deviation which is further accentuated by the fact that we are indeed "inside outsiders", the paradoxical state of being where one is so emotionally attached to the deceased so as to consider him/her to be a part of one's inner world, but in the external reality of things, one doesn't even personally know the deceased, so that one is left hanging on the fringes, the outskirts of it all, as an outsider. The lack of recognition [which can't be helped] in the grieving for the deceased also contributes to the unusual factor of the circumstance. We get addressed with the conglomerate term "fans" as if we were some sort of legion [i.e. the fans are grieving...], whereas someone in the inner/personal circle in Michael's life is given adequate recognition [i.e. Elizabeth Taylor is grieving...]. The two grieving experiences are incredibly different due to such uncontrollable factors, so the only way fans can compensate for grieving in such unusual circumstances is by sharing the bizarre experience with each other as a source of comfort, as only we would be able to understand our emotions and reactions, even if we do not fully understand what we are going through, or why.

The lack of physical closure [going to visit the grave, having cherished possessions of his to remember him by, etc]. also plays a factor in the uniqueness of our circumstance. Undoubtedly, this causes some fans to become "obsessive" in hoarding anything and everything which reminds them of Michael, a seemingly "crazy" thing to do which, upon further analysis, actually is a fairly normal coping mechanism under the above mentioned circumstances. For example, the year Michael died, I wore Michael Jackson shirts/inspired outfits every day of the school year, and I listened to nothing but his music/watched nothing but things having to do with him in some way or other for that entire summer. To someone else, my actions would seem crazy, perhaps even obsessive, but taking into account the fact that the death was 1. a sudden and unexpected death which shook the world at large, no doubt fans and 2. people like myself received no physical closure at all, no personal involvement in the funeral, etc. of the deceased--to want to be surrounded by physical things which have his image or trigger fond memories of him makes perfect sense.

So, really, we are not "crazy." The situation we are being forced to acknowledge, the sudden death of a man we all loved, is crazy. We only cope in the ways we can, and these are many and varied depending upon the personality [i.e. some's personalities are more extroverted, so they rally other fans in events, others are more introverted so they write blogs and articles in the solitary safety of their home] and psychological state [i.e. some embark upon "normal" grieving, accept the fact he's dead, are angry at those who wronged him, etc. while others are unable to accept the death and think he's alive, etc.] of each fan.

The distance between us and Michael, and the distance between each other, make places like this online forum crucial in the healthy grieving process, especially for those of us who cannot comfortably discuss personal matters such as feelings towards Michael with people in our non-Internet lives without being subject to ridicule or plain insensitivity.
 
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^Indeed. Even being in the same country as him, if you find yourself at the opposite end [East Coast] and without the means and resources to travel even to an adjacent state, [much less all the way to California!], the isolation exists in iron curtain-esque magnitudes. Knowing no other MJ fans in my area, you guys are my sole lifeline when it comes to Michael. The grieving process is harder to process when you can't freely talk about the person in question to a sympathetic/understanding audience, so the dialogue and external coping which should ideally take place during the process from shock to acceptance/renewed hope for the future is stunted, a deviation which is further accentuated by the fact that we are indeed "inside outsiders", the paradoxical state of being where one is so emotionally attached to the deceased so as to consider him/her to be a part of one's inner world, but in the external reality of things, one doesn't even personally know the deceased, so that one is left hanging on the fringes, the outskirts of it all, as an outsider. The lack of recognition [which can't be helped] in the grieving for the deceased also contributes to the unusual factor of the circumstance. We get addressed with the conglomerate term "fans" as if we were some sort of legion [i.e. the fans are grieving...], whereas someone in the inner/personal circle in Michael's life is given adequate recognition [i.e. Elizabeth Taylor is grieving...]. The two grieving experiences are incredibly different due to such uncontrollable factors, so the only way fans can compensate for grieving in such unusual circumstances is by sharing the bizarre experience with each other as a source of comfort, as only we would be able to understand our emotions and reactions, even if we do not fully understand what we are going through, or why.

The lack of physical closure [going to visit the grave, having cherished possessions of his to remember him by, etc]. also plays a factor in the uniqueness of our circumstance. Undoubtedly, this causes some fans to become "obsessive" in hoarding anything and everything which reminds them of Michael, a seemingly "crazy" thing to do which, upon further analysis, actually is a fairly normal coping mechanism under the above mentioned circumstances. For example, the year Michael died, I wore Michael Jackson shirts/inspired outfits every day of the school year, and I listened to nothing but his music/watched nothing but things having to do with him in some way or other for that entire summer. To someone else, my actions would seem crazy, perhaps even obsessive, but taking into account the fact that the death was 1. a sudden and unexpected death which shook the world at large, no doubt fans and 2. people like myself received no physical closure at all, no personal involvement in the funeral, etc. of the deceased--to want to be surrounded by physical things which have his image or trigger fond memories of him makes perfect sense.

So, really, we are not "crazy." The situation we are being forced to acknowledge, the sudden death of a man we all loved, is crazy. We only cope in the ways we can, and these are many and varied depending upon the personality [i.e. some's personalities are more extroverted, so they rally other fans in events, others are more introverted so they write blogs and articles in the solitary safety of their home] and psychological state [i.e. some embark upon "normal" grieving, accept the fact he's dead, are angry at those who wronged him, etc. while others are unable to accept the death and think he's alive, etc.] of each fan.

The distance between us and Michael, and the distance between each other, make places like this online forum crucial in the healthy grieving process, especially for those of us who cannot comfortably discuss personal matters such as feelings towards Michael with people in our non-Internet lives without being subject to ridicule or plain insensitivity.
I love your post
 
Wow. Just an utterly incredible article.

It's so sad that despite its depth and truth.. that sadly there will be no end to this :cry: I'd love for there to be a mass portrayal in the public eye about the TRUTH of Michael Jackson.. but as we all know.. The media have picked their side. It makes me sick typing that, but it's true.

I wish there was some turning back for them.. In 50 years time I really hope that Michael is remembered amongst that new generation of people for the way he really was. Not for all this pathetic disgusting tabloid junk that literally day by day, with every article.. is destroying the legacy of our hero. One of the greatest human beings to have lived and the world treats his memory like shit.

:cry:
 
^Indeed. Even being in the same country as him, if you find yourself at the opposite end [East Coast] and without the means and resources to travel even to an adjacent state, [much less all the way to California!], the isolation exists in iron curtain-esque magnitudes. Knowing no other MJ fans in my area, you guys are my sole lifeline when it comes to Michael. The grieving process is harder to process when you can't freely talk about the person in question to a sympathetic/understanding audience, so the dialogue and external coping which should ideally take place during the process from shock to acceptance/renewed hope for the future is stunted, a deviation which is further accentuated by the fact that we are indeed "inside outsiders", the paradoxical state of being where one is so emotionally attached to the deceased so as to consider him/her to be a part of one's inner world, but in the external reality of things, one doesn't even personally know the deceased, so that one is left hanging on the fringes, the outskirts of it all, as an outsider. The lack of recognition [which can't be helped] in the grieving for the deceased also contributes to the unusual factor of the circumstance. We get addressed with the conglomerate term "fans" as if we were some sort of legion [i.e. the fans are grieving...], whereas someone in the inner/personal circle in Michael's life is given adequate recognition [i.e. Elizabeth Taylor is grieving...]. The two grieving experiences are incredibly different due to such uncontrollable factors, so the only way fans can compensate for grieving in such unusual circumstances is by sharing the bizarre experience with each other as a source of comfort, as only we would be able to understand our emotions and reactions, even if we do not fully understand what we are going through, or why.

The lack of physical closure [going to visit the grave, having cherished possessions of his to remember him by, etc]. also plays a factor in the uniqueness of our circumstance. Undoubtedly, this causes some fans to become "obsessive" in hoarding anything and everything which reminds them of Michael, a seemingly "crazy" thing to do which, upon further analysis, actually is a fairly normal coping mechanism under the above mentioned circumstances. For example, the year Michael died, I wore Michael Jackson shirts/inspired outfits every day of the school year, and I listened to nothing but his music/watched nothing but things having to do with him in some way or other for that entire summer. To someone else, my actions would seem crazy, perhaps even obsessive, but taking into account the fact that the death was 1. a sudden and unexpected death which shook the world at large, no doubt fans and 2. people like myself received no physical closure at all, no personal involvement in the funeral, etc. of the deceased--to want to be surrounded by physical things which have his image or trigger fond memories of him makes perfect sense.

So, really, we are not "crazy." The situation we are being forced to acknowledge, the sudden death of a man we all loved, is crazy. We only cope in the ways we can, and these are many and varied depending upon the personality [i.e. some's personalities are more extroverted, so they rally other fans in events, others are more introverted so they write blogs and articles in the solitary safety of their home] and psychological state [i.e. some embark upon "normal" grieving, accept the fact he's dead, are angry at those who wronged him, etc. while others are unable to accept the death and think he's alive, etc.] of each fan.

The distance between us and Michael, and the distance between each other, make places like this online forum crucial in the healthy grieving process, especially for those of us who cannot comfortably discuss personal matters such as feelings towards Michael with people in our non-Internet lives without being subject to ridicule or plain insensitivity.

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! This post beautifully says it all. It's another post I've print and will read repeatedly to help me.

An "outsider" grieving to the extent I have and still do no longer bothers me because this community has made me realize it's normal as another facet of the phenom effect of Michael. He truly was a gift to us. I feel so fortunate now I connected to him to the extent I didn't even know I had until he passed, and I've always been an ardent fan. It really has been like losing a close family member and I now know that doesn't make me crazy because of expressive fans like you. Again, thank you for this exquisite post.
 
:cry: forget acceptance... I'm still in denial! :no:

I have this hope that one day, the truth will be heard by the world about this wonderful man...and when it does, I wanna look at every Miserable douche bags that have been spreading lies about him and still are, AND ask, What the H*ll was wrong with you to do this to a man that did Nothin' to you?


Thankyou for sharing this lovely post!


L.o.v.e.
Romi
 
Great post Mikage Souji.

People don't understand the level of pain and grief Michael fans went through/are going through because they don't understand just how special Michael was. Michael impacted so many of his fans' lives in such a beautiful way; made us care more about the things around us and be better people. Most celebrities don't have that kind of affect on their fans, and that's why we're grieving more about his death.
 
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